Art About Town... Pacific Grove, California

"Art is contemplation. It is the pleasure of the mind which searches into nature and which there divines the spirit of which nature herself is animated."

-Auguste Rodin

Yesterday, it was an absolutely beautiful day along the Monterey Bay peninsula, especially in the town of Pacific Grove. I had forgotten how amazing that place is in the spring, when all the wildflowers are in bloom, and the cliffs become alive with the colors of the season, the most striking of which is the purple, it is planted all along the cliffs and waterfront. My favorite park in Pacific Grove is, Lovers Point. It offers a gorgeous view of the peninsula, and although not too big as parks go, it is more than just lovely... it's stunning! It truly lives up to it's name. :) The park has two prominent sculptures on display, my favorite being the above, "Butterfly," by Petaluma born sculptor, Gordon Newell. Engraved on the base of the sculpture are the words...

Gift of Hilda Van Sicklen
1964
Sculptor George Newell

Pacific Grove is "Butterfly Town USA," after all. Every year, in the autumn, I look forward to visiting the Monarch sanctuary, where thousands of monarchs can be seen settling in the eucalyptus grove, during their annual migration. According to a one volunteer I spoke with last October, there can be as many as 15,000 clustered high in the Monterey Pines, Eucalyptus and cypress trees within the sanctuary. :) It is a place of peace and comfort for me, I guess that's why I love this sculpture so very much, and yesterday, I finally got the opportunity to photograph it. :)There really isn't a bad time to visit the Monterey peninsula, even on a rainy day it portrays a romantic atmosphere, and there is natural beauty to be found everywhere.


-OndineMonet
"Butterfly"
Lover's Point Park
Pacific Grove, California
April 12th, 2007
Early Afternoon

A Jackass Walks Into The Presidency With A Duck On His Head...

"The only real diplomacy ever performed by a diplomat, is in deceiving their own people after their dumbness has got them into a war."

-Will Rogers

Anyone else remember when the Commander-in -Chief was the one who actually ran the war? I have got to stop reading AOL news before I go to bed, because really, no good could come of it. What the HELL is Bush up to now? Is he looking for another buffer so he can say that the next disaster of policy in Iraq is not his fault? He wants to create yet another made up position. And not just any made up position, he wants a "War Czar." "A War Czar?" I would laugh my ass off, if it wasn't so damn scary, and so damn sad for our troops. You know, I once asked a question, which I thought was an honest one, which was, 'why didn't Bush's parents get him him a tutor, in that he was a "C" student?'

No one has been able to give me an answer to that question, because no one really knows what the deal really was with the current President Bush's education. Bush himself admits he had to knock on some doors to go as far with his education as he did. So, I have been thinking, considering every lame ass excuse, and decision that comes out of the White House these days, I have to wonder if maybe we shouldn't all chip in an extra... oh say... $1.00 on our tax returns, and get our little George a tutor, to help him in his service as our president. After all we are stuck with him for another 648 days, unless someone, somewhere, grows a backbone and actually pushes for impeachment.

But say for the sake of argument we did get him a tutor, we would need someone who can teach him how to lead, read reports, engage in diplomacy, and take responsibility for his actions, or rather his lack of action, like a man. Someone who will help him learn that lying is wrong. Someone who can teach him the courage to admit a mistake when he has made one, and that you don't keep digging, when you have found you're in too deep. A good history lesson and some flag etiquette wouldn't hurt. I wonder, is there such a teacher? If there was, I would be the first to chip in that dollar, because I am just really tired of him not actually learning anything, despite his creation of an "Office of Lessons Learned." Then again, how can he learn anything, when he gets others to do his homework. Sigh. No teacher in the world, can teach a pupil who refuses to learn. :(

-White House Considers Naming War Czar

-ABC News Exclusive: Pentagon To Extend Service For All Soldiers In Iraq And Afghanistan

So tell me, do you think America needs a War Czar? Would such a position give you more confidence in policies regarding the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan?

-OndineMonet

I Know Who Shot J.R.Ewing!

"If you have to be in a soap opera, try not to get the worst role."

-Judy Garland

Sigh! Raise your hand if you watch SOAPnet. Go ahead... I won't give your secret away, I watch it too, although, not as much as I used to. This past week, the powers that be decided to revamp the schedule of the all soap opera oriented network, by adding reruns of The OC, One Tree Hill, and inundating the daily schedule with repeats of the 1980's hit nighttime soap, Dallas. Sigh. You know, as much as I don't like change, and if you have been reading me for any length of time, you know just how MUCH I don't like it, I do understand the need for networks to shake things up a bit from time to time to keep it all fresh, but the latest schedule changes have me scratching my head! Why exactly would I want to watch Dallas, not just once a day, but four times a day?

Dallas has it's rightful place in American pop culture, but really now, where would you have to have been not to know the answer to the biggest question of the 1980's, "Who Shot J.R.?" I know who shot him, it was his sister-in-law, Kristen. She was mad at him or something. LOL. I saw it play out originally, back in the 80's, and it was an interesting subject to ponder at school and at parties. Heck, eventually Trivial Pursuit made "Who Shot J.R.?" one of their questions. We all know the answer now, so why in the world would SOAPnet air reruns of Dallas, when it has been showing in reruns to death on every channel imaginable for the last 20 years or so? It's boring programming, four times a day. Sigh.

TY Treadway

I am a night owl. I enjoyed watching the shows that were removed from the schedule. Ryan's Hope, Port Charles, Another World, and the original SOAPnet talk show, Soap Talk. Ty Treadway is a little bit of heaven. That man is gorgeous! He has had my attention since his days on One Life To Live, where he played the hunky, shirtless, Dr. Troy MacIver, and his evil twin, Dr. Colin MacIver. That guy made getting sick, look like it could actually be fun. :) After leaving One Life To Live, he c0-hosted SOAP TALK, with Lisa Rinna, who I can take or leave, but the show must have had something going for it, because it was recently nominated for a daytime Emmy award, for Best Talk Show. So why would SOAPnet cancel it? Sigh.

I liked watching reruns of Ryan's Hope. I began watching that show when I was in junior high, and on through high school. I couldn't keep up with it when I started college, but my sister and mother would fill me in about it when I got home. It was ok, but being told about a show, is never as good as being able to see it for oneself. A couple years ago, I was kinda happy to find out that SOAPnet was carrying it, and I began to watch it again, getting a second chance to see what I had missed the first time around. It was a silly guilty pleasure. Like watching Another World, which was cancelled by NBC in June of 1999. I was a huge fan of that show, and even met local soap star, Tom Eplin. I told you about that time I met him, you remember, my head was upside down in a bowl of warm water at the time. I was at a "BEAUTY" shop. In that particular moment, I sure didn't feel beautiful... but goodness... that man was gorgeous even upside down! And yes, his eyes are indeed that beautiful!!!

Tom Eplin

Sigh. Well, Ryan's Hope will be airing 2 episodes on Sunday mornings at 3:00 AM Pacific time, so I do have that. I tried to download an episode of Another World today from AOL Video, but I am on dial-up, so I gave up after 18 hours and only 36% progress. Sigh. I have been looking into getting a high speed connection, and it looks like it will be possible soon, until then, the schedule is what it is. What can you do? Right? Of course if you are a fan of these shows like I am, and you miss them too, please consider emailing SOAPnet and telling them to put our shows back. Or if you don't really watch these shows, but you think I am just nifty, please consider emailing SOAPnet and telling them there is a rather distressed lady in California, who really wants her favorite old soap operas, and Ty Treadway brought back where they belong, on her TV, at their regularly scheduled times, because sometimes, she doesn't want to think of her real life soap opera, she wants to think about a hunky shirtless fictional doctor, and his evil twin, and ponder what might happen next. :) How come real doctors never go shirtless? ;)

SOAPnet
SOAPnet Schedule


-OndineMonet

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Get Close Part III

"In photography there is a reality so subtle that it becomes more real than reality."

-Alfred Stieglitz

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Take a picture of something in extreme close-up - so close it's hard to tell what you are looking at. Ask people to guess. On Thursday, reveal what you've photographed. The only catch: If you've done this before, no reusing old pictures. Get close to something new.

-John Scalzi (By The Way)

I need to work on my macro photography... I bet you can tell what that is in the above picture.Oh well, John says we should ask you to take a guess... OK... go ahead... guess! :) Come back here on Thursday, for the update to this entry, in which, I will reveal everything! :) BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA! That was my EVIL laugh just then, tee hee.

The Reveal...

TaaaDaaaa... It's Wilton's Peppermint Sprinkles :)

-OndineMonet
"Secret Ingredient"
Berkeley, California
April 9th, 2007
Late Evening

Half A Serenity Chip Is Better Than No Serenity Chip At All...

"If you as what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it."

-George Burns

Easter, as it turns out, was a plan "B" kind of day. Elvis and I did make cookies, and had a pretty nice time, and then he and I went on a hunt. No, not an Easter egg hunt, no we went on a "where-the-HELL-did-mommy-put-her-keys" hunt. The last time I had seen them, was the wee hours of Saturday morning when I made a late night run to Taco Bell for nibbles. It's not good for me to eat nachos at 2:00 a.m., but you know, sometimes it just feels good to go for a ride, when it's dark, and I can just play the CD player loud, and sing my brains out. I have really good neighbors, for the most part, but even they don't want to hear me singing in the middle of the night. Nope. So, I took my voice elsewhere, and when I got home, I could have sworn I put my keys on the desk next to Alan's laptop computer.

Yesterday afternoon, I decided to take a drive. It was a pleasant Easter day, and I was hoping to perhaps, maybe, see a bunny or two, flopping about up here in the hills. When I went to retrieve my keys, they weren't in the last place I remember them being. Nope. Gone were they! So, I spent the rest of the day, looking under things, looking over things, looking in the oven, refrigerator and on top of the water heater. I looked in my unmentionables drawer, my purse, my scrunchies purse. I looked under the lemon tree, no small feat there, and I even looked in my spice drawer. No keys. I gave up looking at about 7:00 p.m., and sat down to have a good cry and watch Dateline.

A good long cry it was. I was missing my keys, and the silly items I carry on that ring. Items that would mean nothing to anyone else but me. The cross a friend gave me when I was going through a difficult time, which she said would ward off emotional vampires. I feel like Buffy when I look at that thing. The serenity chip I got when I graduated from Adult daycare in 2001, the year I went all "eccentric," LOL. I accidentally cut it in half one day, when I slammed it in the trunk of my car. I cried that day too. It was so symbolic, imagine cutting your own serenity in half! Still, half a serenity chip is better than no serenity chip at all! LOL. As you can see, I also have a Stuart Little on my key chain, a gift from a tiny friend... so I would never be alone.
A silver butterfly, which was a gift from Alan, and a Winnie The Pooh, that I bought myself. I don't know, just made me smile.

I think the tears were about more than my lost key chain treasures.It was about some lost friendship treasures as well, and I needed to let some sadness out. My friend Pam died last year on Easter. It wasn't the same date on the calendar, but it was Easter, so I guess I will always think of her on that holiday. I miss her. Sigh. I wish I could email her and ask her for some of her recipes for pet food, because I am worried about feeding Elvis his usual prescription food. Pam would know what to do. She loved animals and devoted a lot of her time to them. Sigh. I hate Lung Cancer's guts! :(

After the second commercial of Dateline, I decided to dry my eyes, and try looking one more place, the bag containing the decorations and accessories for Elvis's birthday party. We are doing a Spongebob Squarepants theme, for his party this year, and I had just bought the items on Friday, at Dana's Party Planet. The bag was on the floor, in my office, next to my desk. Hmmm... could they be there? Yes! OMG... I found them! :) I have a feeling Elvis may have found them on the floor, and placed them inside the bag. He knew the bag had things for him in it, as I chased him out of it several times. Each time he scampered away with a silly grin.

He always knows when something is especially for him. I don't know how he knows, but then again, he is just special. So, I think he was trying to pick up my toys for a change, and of course he put them in an important place. He is fussy about things being just so. He is Elvis. And with the finding of my keys, came relief and happiness, and a few minutes later my pal H.P. called to wish me a Happy Easter. :) All was well with the world. I just know Pam would have laughed.

Spongebob Squarepants Theme Song

Are you ready kids?
I said are you ready?
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Spongebob Squarepants
Absorbant and yellow and porous is he
Spongebob Squarepants
If nautical nonsense be something you wish
Spongebob Squarepants
Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish
Spongebob Squarepants (Repeat Four Times)

-OndineMonet
"Keys To Things"
Berkeley, California
April 8th, 2007
Evening

Happy Easter

Awake, thou wintry earth
Fling off they sadness!
Fair vernal flowers, laugh forth
Your ancient gladness!

-Thomas Blackburn "An Eastern Hymn"

It should be a quiet day at my house for Easter. Alan is working a double shift, so that leaves Elvis and I with each other's company. Always fun. We have big plans. He is going to help me make Peanut Butter Blossom cookies, his father's favorite, and we might even make a batch of macaroons or maybe some Lemon Poppy Seed muffins. Maybe I will take a picture of him in his little apron, yes, he really does have his own apron. He is an excellent kitchen assistant. :) Wherever you are, I hope your Easter Sunday is a relaxing one. :) Happy Easter!

"I think of the garden after the rain;
And hope to my heart comes singing.
At morn the cherry-blooms will be white,
And the Easter bells be ringing!"

-Edna Dean Proctor, "Easter Bells"

-OndineMonet
"Happy Easter"
Berkeley, California
April 7th, 2007
Afternoon

Bunnies! Bunnies! It Must Be Bunnies! Or Maybe Gravy Boats

"If you listen to your fears, you will die never knowing what a great person you might have been."

-Robert Schuller

Several years ago, about a year or two after I moved into my cottage, I was driving up my drive way, and to my surprise I saw this amazing bunny just hopping along, toward the back of the property where my house sits. I couldn't help but smile, it was spring after all, and a cute little silver bunny was paying me a visit. I figured it was probably one of Elvis's wildlife friends. LOL. He has so many, including a raccoon that actually knocks on the back door late at night, to see if he can come out to play. I kid you not. Elvis is a popular cat in our neighborhood. :)

Of course the bunny also made me smile because I couldn't help but think of one of my favorite characters from "Buffy The Vampire Slayer," Anya. See, Anya had an overwhelming fear of bunnies. All bunnies, even stuffed bunnies. LOL. I don't remember the show ever fully explaining why she was so afraid of them, she simply was, and that was that. I found it hard to believe that a former vengeance demon would be afraid of anything, but I guess fear knows no bounds. I guess that is why it always made me think about my own fears, the long term ones, and the short lived ones... and put a little more thought into whether or not they were indeed reasonable.

I don't fear the Easter Bunny, but I have an overwhelming fear of Santa Claus. I don't fear the Christmas Krampas, but again, I shiver and my heart pounds if a mall Santa even says hello to me. I don't even fear the ghouls of Halloween, so why would such a jolly holiday icon scare me silly? I guess I will never find out the answer as to why Santa scares me so much, it hasn't exactly been a priority in my sessions with Sarah, but maybe it should be. LOL. I wonder... is it really unreasonable? Hmmm. I suppose I could write a little song about that fear, you know, just in case I should suddenly burst into spontaneous song like Anya did in the episode, "Once More With Feeling."

Anya...

Bunnies aren't just cute
Like everybody supposes!
They got them hoppy legs
And twitchy little noses!
And what's with all the carrots?
What do they need such good eyesight for anyway?
Bunnies! Bunnies! It Must be bunnies!
Or maybe midgets.

"Anya" Tabula Rasa

Apparently Anya was also afraid of midgets. LOL. She was so afraid of bunnies, that in the very next episode "Tabula Rasa," she was accidentally inflicted with temporary amnesia, yet still remembered her fear of bunnies! Now that's fear! I guess the most unreasonable fear I have carried around for any length of time was my fear of ceramic coffee mugs. I don't mean to keep teasing you about that, I promise to share that one soon, it's just that I can't believe I ever felt that way. Weird. So many of my fears have kept me from pursuing really good things in life. Feeling not good enough, is a lot like giving up before an opportunity comes along. It felt good to stand up for myself a couple weeks ago, when someone continued to disregard my time. A few years ago I wouldn't have. I would have said something like, "It's ok... things happen."

Yikes. That's no way to live. I have a few things right now I am scared to death of, but I have set a deadline to meet that fear face to face. I need to spend more time out in the world... meeting new people... doing new things. Like going to a movie sometime by myself. I have never done that. Isn't that odd? I don't know what I think might happen, if I went by myself, maybe I wouldn't be a good date and I would have to break up with me over it. LOL. Nah, I rock, and I know it. :) I would date me. LOL. So maybe I should... date me I mean. Take myself to the movies, and lunch, maybe even make a gravy boat at a pottery shop. That would cure two fears at one time. I do need a new gravy boat before the holiday season comes up next autumn. Yes, I will start with making a gravy boat. That's a reasonable place to start... right? :) I guess I could always take a page out of Anya's book. In the last episode she, and the Scooby gang, had to face the original big bad of all evil. Even though she was scared to death, she tapped into her fears to find the strength to face what was in front of her. She died... but she didn't die frightened. LOL. I am sure making a gravy boat won't be nearly as scary as facing the original evil. Gulp. At least I hope it won't. ;)

"Fear is that little darkroom where fears are developed."

-Michael Pritchard

-OndineMonet
"The Bunny"
Berkeley, California
April, 2003
Afternoon

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #159: Your Pen Name

"Do not ask the name of the person who seeks a bed for the night. He who is reluctant to give his name is the one who most needs shelter."

-Victor Hugo

Weekend Assignment #156: You've decided to become a writer under a pen name. What pen name do you choose? Because, after all, writers use pen names all the time - sometimes to maintain anonymity, sometimes to start a new career when their writing career under their real name has crashed and burned, and sometimes just because they want a different name than the one they were born with. You can assume any of the reasons for taking up a pen name. (No fair using a name that's taken: Your pen name can't be "Steve King" or Jonathan Grisham" or some such.)

Extra Credit: Using this Anagram Maker, share an amusing anagram of your name.

-John Scalzi (By The Way)

Hmmm.What if I told you that I use a pen name to pen my blog? Would you kick me to the curb? Would you turn your back on me? WINK! When I first began blogging, a lot of folks were using fake names, because they felt like they had a little more freedom to write their innermost feelings in their blogs and journals with a little more peace of mind. It is the Internet you know. I considered maybe using a different name, it had been a rough few years leading up to when I first began Ellipsis, and after all, what's in a name... right? I pondered it. Seriously. I consulted my friends, thought about it some more. Sigh! In the end, I am who I am. Right? So, Carly Gordon it was and Carly Gordon it shall stay. It's who I am.

But it's not like I never used a nickname in my whole life. For a long time I went by Chloe. It was a nickname hand picked for me by a dear friend. She thought I looked like a Chloe. One day she and I were having a "girl's day out," and over lunch, we were discussing baby names. She was due in about 5 months, and as we considered names, she asked me if I had ever wished my name was something different. I hadn't really thought about it till then, but when she said she thought I looked like a Chloe, I had to smile, because I had a cat named Chloe, when I was a little girl, and also, I used to wear the perfume Chloe. I told her I liked the name, and so, from then on, within a certain circle of friends, my name was Chloe, but that was a long time ago, and in fact the last person to call me that, Mr. November, recently moved away. Now I am just plain old Carly again. No worries.

Names are such strange things anyway. We have no choice over what our parents name us. So we could end up with a god-awful name like the one I heard on "Raines" the other night, "Harry Paratesties." LOL. Or "Luke Warmwater," which is a real name by the way, I happened to come across when I worked for the ad agency. LOL. Or that awful pen name chosen for Miss Crump on the Andy Girffith show, "Helene Alexian Dubois." Does that sound like a good name for an author of children's books? Yuck!

I don't know if I will ever write a book at this point in life, it seems that some of my dreams have been seriously boxed up, and placed on a shelf. Who knows? My best friend "H.P." has been insisting that I write a coffee table book about the Bay Area, as seen through my camera lens. He's a dreamer. :) And he is probably my biggest fan, not just my best friend, so he has all kinds of dreams for me, and all kinds of encouragement for me as well. Everyone should have a friend like "H.P." I think I will know him, well into my old lady years, where he will still be nagging me, I mean encouraging me to write that book. LOL. WINK H.P.

Ok, let's pretend I write that coffee table book, and for whatever reason I choose to use a pen name, what name would I use? Ondine Monet is a great screen name, but Alan has always thought it sounded like the name of an exotic dancer. Well, that would never do. I could use a combination of my screen name and my real name. Ondine has her own legend, so that's kind of cool. Sure. How about,"Ondine Gordon." Hey, that's not too bad. Yes, I like that. Here is how it would appear on the cover of the book...

Ellipsis

The Bay Area In Pictures

By Ondine Gordon

Extra Credit: Hows this for an amusing anagram for Carly Gordon? "A Corn Dry Log." ROFLMAO! Now that's feminine. Tee Hee.

-OndineMonet
"Another Bay Area Moment"
Fort Point
San Francisco, California
October, 2006
Afternoon

Images From Yesterday

"Those artists who say that somehow therapy or analysis will thwart their creativity are completely misinformed. It's absolutely the opposite. It opens doors."

-Paul Schrader

As you know, Wednesday's are a busy day for me. I have therapy first thing in the morning with Sarah, then I try my best to continue on with my day, as if all was perfectly fine. I do all the normal things. Hmmm... normal things? Sometimes I wonder about what normal means. Does it mean I do the shopping? Go out to lunch? Sign a petition? Prepare dinner? Make the bed? Smile politely when someone asks me, "How are you today?" It is such a pat answer, do any of us really expect any other answer than, "Just fine thank you?"

Truth is, most days, even therapy days, are just fine, although therapy days are perhaps my most challenging of all the days of the week. Yesterday... was challenging. I dealt with some more recent things that have been invading my peace of mind. Recent let downs, and losses. Sarah and I talked about Mr. November, and what it means to let go. We talked about how Alan and I are doing really well... and feeling really close. Not that it was an issue or anything, but with marriage comes those inevitable moments of normalcy, which can impersonate mundane with great ease.

Fortunately he and I talk, and we work on things, which keeps us going the right way. And if for some reason we do start to drift, Elvis will make his feelings known. He will have no part of our family not being happy with each other. That cat has been amazing for our marriage. It felt good to share with Sarah that Alan and I recently had a long talk about where our marriage is, and also be able to talk about the past with ease. It was freeing, still, therapy is work. It's hard work, and it leaves me very sad, and very tired at the end of the hour. Thank goodness Sarah doesn't mind that I bring my camera to every session, because right in the middle of all the sadness, I sometimes see the world differently, because right out the window that sits to my right, is the world. And in the world is art...

Art. Art that is sometimes by mistake, sometimes on purpose. Art that speaks to my soul, and reminds me that life is just what is in front of us. Like the weather, it is constantly changing, and I can adjust myself to be comfortable with it, or I can sit on a couch, in my therapist's office in Berkeley, California, and cry, and complain, and wish that it didn't hurt so bad sometimes. Yesterday, in the middle of wishing, I looked out the window, and I saw a record sitting in the window of the building next door. I couldn't make out what the name of the album was, but I felt something when I saw it, so I listened to that instinctual voice in me, that tells me when to snap a photo, and I did just that... I took the picture.

When I got home, I enlarged the photo, and found it was side 2 of the soundtrack to the Broadway musical, "Hair." I was floored. All around Berkeley these days, you can see the very same sights you would have probably seen in the late 60's and the early 70's, when "Hair" was playing on stage originally. Back then it was Vietnam, today it is Iraq. We are still trying to get the message about the decline environment to be heard.We've made progress with Civil Rights, but lost ground on Civil Liberties. People's Park is still filled with the homeless, do you know that over 50% of homeless are veterans? And as I drove past a certain group of protesters, I was impressed to see that they were senior citizens, who were making their voices heard, about the injustice that is coming out of the Bush administration. Damn Hippies! LOL.

As of April 4th, 2007

Sigh. Life is painful. Life is a series of moments, that somehow become years. Can you believe it's been 5 1/2 years since 9/11? Or 4 years since we invaded Iraq? Sometimes it all feels like just yesterday. Life goes by so fast, and before you know it, well... you know... it moves forward whether we are ready to accompany it or not. Life does not ask our permission for anything, but hopefully, if we are very lucky, when we put it all together we are not so sad, that we can't find the strength to acknowledge the losses, search for our own personal truth, and find the art life, not just the pain.

Easy To Be Hard
From "Hair"

How can people be so heartless? How can people be so cruel?
Easy to be hard, easy to be cold
How can people have no feelings? How can they ignore their friends?
Easy to be proud, easy to say no.

And especially people who care about strangers
Who care about evil and social injustice
Do you only care about the bleeding crowd?
How about a needing friend? I need a friend.

How can people be so heartless? You know I'm hung up on you
Easy to give in, easy to help out

And especially people who care about strangers
Who say they care about social injustice
Do you care only about the bleeding crowd?
How about a needing friend? I need a friend.

-OndineMonet
"Another Wednesday"
Berkeley, California
April 4th, 2007
Late Morning

Round Robin Challenge: "Personal Challenges"

"Opportunities to find deeper powers within ourselves, come when life seems most challenging."

-Joseph Campbell

When I saw what the topic was for this edition of the Round Robin Challenges was, I thought to myself... "YIKES! I know exactly what to share, I will share my fear of bees." I have a pretty good reason for fearing them, see, my mother was highly allergic to them, and one day when I was a little girl, I saw her stung by a honey bee. The next few hours were really frightening. She was in her garden, tending to her roses, and I was on our front porch, enjoying a frozen juice bar, she had just bought me off the ice cream truck. It was a hot summer day, so that treat was really hitting the spot. Suddenly, I saw my mother fall to the ground. I got up and ran to her, to see she was making choking sounds and sweating. I ran across the street to my neighbor, who called an ambulance for us. It seemed like it took them forever, she was in anaphylactic shock.

My mother knew she was allergic to bees, yet chose to keep a garden anyway. She did things like that. I guess it was her way of living on the edge or something. Eventually, our HMO gave her a bee sting kit to carry with her, should she ever have it happen again. Thank goodness, it never did, but the incident left me with a huge fear of bees, and most flying creatures for that matter, and she did nothing to quell those fears. One day, a few years ago, I realized I feared more in life than I embraced. I was tired of worrying about everything, and taking on all that negativity. So, while I was in therapy to fix some problems I had, I decided to work on some of my fears. It was my way of gaining control over my life again, or for the first time... LOL. I am never really sure which it is. LOL.

I have been enjoying photographing bees the last couple years, although unfortunately I haven't yet achieved the PERFECT bee photo yet. I have lots, and lots of bee butts. LOL. I also have bird butts, butterfly butts, and even an airplane butt at low altitude... but I haven't gotten a picture of a bee smiling at my camera. I think I am going to make this year, the year of the "Flying Creatures." I have all the rest of the year to come up with one happy bee. Overcoming my fears has been exhausting, it seems like I have had so many, but each time I allow myself to face it head on, deal with the pain, and finally take the mystery out of it, I move on in life with a lot more peace. I am lucky, because most of my life challenges can be captured in the lens of my camera, which allows me to face it on my own terms. Then I can research it, learn about it, and finally move on. It's not so extraordinary really, folks do it every day. Sometime I will share about my overwhelming fear of ceramic coffee mugs! LOL. I mean my former overwhelming fear of ceramic coffee mugs. WINK!

Thank you Kerrin, this was a thought provoking challenge. I appreciated it so much! Kerrin's blog is, "A New Day A New Photo." Be sure to visit all the Round Robin participants, just follow the links below! Don't forget to visit the official Round Robin blog on Thursday, to find out what our next challenge will be! :)

Allergies To Insect Stings - WebMD

Spider Bites and Insect Stings Quiz - MayoClinic

Linking List

1. Kerrin... A New Day A New Photo
POSTED!

2. Steven... (sometimes) photoblog
POSTED!

3. Carly... Ellipsis... Suddenly Carly
POSTED!

4. Karen... Outpost Mavarin
POSTED!

5. boliyou... Percolation


6. Kat... In My Dreams I Can Fly
POSTED!

7. Nancy... Nancy Luvs Pics
POSTED!

8. Suzanne R... New Suzanne R's Life
POSTED!

9. Marie... Photographs and Memories
POSTED!

10. Teena... It's all about me!
POSTED!

11. Gattina... Keyhole Pictures
POSTED!

12. Valorie... Dear Family
POSTED!



-OndineMonet

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Blossoms & Blooms

"Sometimes our fate resembles a fruit tree in winter. Who would think that those branches would turn green again and blossom, but we hope it, we know it."

-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Take a snap of the latest blossoms or blooms near you. If for some reason it's still too chilly where you are, one, you have my sympathy, and two, go ahead and use a picture from your archives. But everyone should go out and take a fresh picture if they can. Let's see what spring looks like here in 2007.

-John Scalzi (By The Way)

I loved this photo shoot assignment. I had a really nice afternoon, just playing with my camera in my own world. I have three fruit trees in my back yard, a plum, a pear tree and a Meyer lemon. The plum tree is through blooming for the year, my pear tree still has some blossoms, but very few. My lemon tree is another story. It is covered with the loveliest blossoms, which are white and pale pink. The buds are a deep pink, but when they open they seem to fade to white, with a very light pink on the outside. The scent is simply amazing. Imagine a soft jasmine scent, with just a hint of tangerine. The Meyer is my favorite type of lemon, sometimes I just pick one off the tree and eat it. It is a sweeter variety, than most other lemons, and it makes some fabulous lemonade. That is one of the best parts of spring and summer around here, lemonade made from lemons grown on that beautiful tree of mine. There is nothing like citrus blossoms. :)

-OndineMonet
"Meyer Lemon Blossom"
Berkeley, California
April 2, 2007
Afternoon

Which Child Are You?

"Life is a B movie: It's stupid, and it's strange, it's a directionless story, the dialogue is lame, but in the "he said/she said' sometimes there's some poetry if you turn your back long enough and let it happen naturally."

-Ani Difranco

Mondays. Most people hate them, not me, I enjoy a good Monday. Monday is my hump day. LOL. Stop thinking naughty... lol... all I mean is that Monday's are Alan's Wednesdays. You know... hump... as in the middle of the work week? LOL. Anyway, last week is over, my mood has improved, and while I am kinda tired and fighting some of the usual affects of Fibromyalgia, I am thinking more positively then I was a few days ago. Sometimes a good rant or two can be good for the soul. You know, out with the old, in with the new. Hopefully, with the warmer weather coming in, a nice photo session I have planned with my kitty, and a Round Robin Challenge planned for this week, I will have plenty to keep me busy and happy. I slept a long time today, and I am still sleepy, so I am going to go to bed early tonight. :) Sleep, on a slightly cold night, is so wonderful. I love to climb inside the fuzzy blankets and drift off to a deep sleep. :)

The other night, or morning I should say, I tried to let go of the days irritations by doing some positive imagery. My thoughts were kind of scattered. I kept ruminating on the woes, so I began to switch to music lyrics. That was fun. I got more than one song stuck in my brain. Ever try to fall asleep while trying to get the words to "Walk This Way," out of your brain? LOL. Or worse, "Rag Doll." Steven Tyler gets me every time. What to do, what to do? It was a thinker, until I decided to go full stop on thinking all together! Ever try that? LOL. Oh my, that wouldn't work. Ok, so how about my other favorite way to drift off to sleep... The List Game. It's a version of counting sheep, only less woolly. Lists of soap opera characters, state capitols, paint color samples, crayons, anything will work as a topic, as long as you find it trivial enough that you eventually bore yourself to sleep.

Somehow, I managed to go through all my lists, and still no real sleepiness. I finally gave up, put on C-SPAN and that did the trick like it always does. I have an 8-hour video tape of a C-Span session from 1999, that I keep on hand for times when sleep is just not interested in paying me a visit. Stupid Sandman. I fell asleep just fine, but while I was asleep, I dreamed I was talking about poetry with the Invisible Man. Yep that's right, The Invisible Man. I know what your thinking, if the man I was discussing poetry with was invisible, how do I know it was THE Invisible Man? Well, see, sometime back I wrote an entry about how unusual it was to realize, while watching the movie, "Abbott & Costello Meet The Invisible Man," on AMC, that he ( the invisible man) went commando, and I recognized him from that movie. Still a strange thought though... that he (The Invisible Man) goes commando.

Anyway, Mr. Invisible and I were talking about that Mother Goose poem, "Monday's Child." You know the one...

Monday's Child is fair of face
Tuesday's child is full of grace
Wednesday's child is full of woe
Thursday's child has far to go
Friday's child is loving and giving
Saturday's child works hard for a living
But the child that is born on the Sabbath day
Is bonny and blithe, and good and gay.

And so I asked him, what day of the week he was born on. Now, considering the movie I was referencing was in my dream state, it would mean that I was speaking with Arthur Franz who played the invisible man in that particular movie. His character's name was Tommy Nelson. Since the movie never mentions the birthday of the invisible man, the dream went about it's way the way dreams do, meaning I probably fell into a deep enough sleep, that our conversation was no longer useful to my brain. When I woke up however, I was still considering our interaction, so I decided to look up the birthday of Arthur Franz, in his Internet biography. He was born, February 29th, 1920 and passed away on, June 16th, 2006. From there I went to Calendar Home.com and looked up what day of the week his birthday fell on. He was born on a Sunday. He was a Sunday's child.

I am a Friday's child. I was nearly a Saturday's child. I was born at 10:31 PM on June 29th, 1962. Sigh. I like my birthday, and my zodiac sign, and even where the poems places me, but I have to wonder about poor Wednesday. I know the character of Wednesday Adams was named after the poem. Wednesdays are notoriously bad days for me, which is why I will never schedule another meeting for that day of the week as long as I live. LOL. I tell myself that it isn't true, one day can't be worse than any of the rest of the week. It's just a day, then like a schmuck I schedule something important and then the fur flies, and I am right back in my bed that night ruminating on how everything would have been fine, had it not been a Wednesday. Sigh. It's exhausting, lol, but not in a good way. ;)

Wanna share? If you are one of my lurkers, now is a good time to say hello. Tell me what day of the week you were born. If you aren't sure of the day, you can find out at CalendarHome.com. Just go to the top left side of the header banner and put in a year. It will redirect you to a full calendar page for that year. Come on, you know you want to. :)

-OndineMonet
"Pear Blossom"
Berkeley, California
March 31, 2007
Afternoon

The April Fool

"If you once forfeit the confidence of your fellow citizens, you can never regain their respect and esteem. It is true that you many fool all of the people some of the time; you can even fool some of the people all of the time; but you can't fool all of the people all of the time."

-Abraham Lincoln

Can things in America get much more painful? Yesterday, Mary Tillman, mother of patriot, and soldier, Pat Tillman, who was killed by "friendly fire" in Afghanistan, accused President Bush of knowingly and willfully, using her son's death to promote the war. Of suppressing evidence that one high-ranking general said might, "embarrass," the president. The warning to the president came just one week after the "friendly fire," incident that killed Tillman. Of course the White House denies ever having been warned about the circumstances of Tillman's death, but that isn't any big surprise. It seems that the inner circle of the Bush administration is never involved in the scandals that have emerged in the years George Bush as been president. It's ironic, that Bush knows so little about so much.

Pat Tillman had a bright future, just as all the men and women who signed up to serve in the military did. He, and in fact all of them, deserved better than they got. Our men and women were mislead, just as the American people were, about why we were going to war. There's evidence that Halliburton was feeding our soldiers, sometimes spoiled and outdated food. No investigations into that by the president. And don't you just love Cheney, spouting that the congress and senate are letting down the troops by setting a timetable to leave Iraq? It was six weeks ago, that the story broke in the media regarding the shabby conditions at Walter Reed Hospital. Six weeks! Bush is just now paying a visit there and apologizing for it? True, he has been to Walter Reed many times to visit soldiers who were recovering from their wartime injuries, yet his visit last Friday, was the first visit since the story broke. Strange timing don't you think? Just as the truth was coming out about Pat Tillman, and the possible cover-up of what actually killed that young man.

Are you like me? When you think about the scandals, and the shame that has poured out from this administration, do you feel sick to your stomach? Do you go to bed at night, and pray you will wake up on September 10th, 2001? Sometimes when I think about how ill I was back then, how detached I was from everything, it seems like it was someone elses life. But no, it was mine. As sad as I was, and as detached as I was, the kind of evil that would take place, was never something I could have imagined. Do you ever wish you could wake up and find that the Twin Towers never fell? That there isn't a president in office who cared so little about the country he was trusted to serve, that he would have been on vacation 55% of the first 8 months he was in office? That he would ignore reports and memos regarding plans to attack America? When I think of all September 11th means right at this moment, I see that Osama Bin Laden won so much more then he set out to accomplish. Hell, Bush has handed it him on a silver platter.

Nearly every single scandal to come out of the Bush administration, can be linked back to the events of September 11th, 2001 and it's aftermath, with the exception of the devastation of Hurricane Katrina, that's a heartache of another story. Do you ever wish that we could go back to September 10th, 2001, and hug our loved ones, smile at strangers, let someone cut in front of us in traffic, cuddle our pets, feel that late summer sun, hear planes flying over our heads, smell a beautiful flower, photograph a perfect moment, brush the hair from our lovers eyes, and then kiss them like there is no tomorrow. Sometimes it feels like we will never have honesty in this country again.

Hope is certainly fleeting, unless you are one of the hopelessly ignorant like Bill O' Reilly. Shame on you Bill O' Reilly, calling for the firing of Rosie O' Donnell, all because she is asking the question about how and why Tower 7 of the World Trade Center fell.You have some nerve, considering you once said that Al-Qaeda should blow up Coit Tower, in San Francisco, because you didn't like that the citizens of San Francisco voted to officially state their opposition to military recruiting on campuses. Strange what constitutes a patriot anymore, or rather what doesn't constitute treason. Sigh. I am not much for conspiracy theories, but I have some questions about how and why Tower 7 fell, don't you? Come on Bill... not even one question for the sake of the truth?

In some ways I feel sorry for Bill O' Reilly, and folks like him, because they are the ones who will be hurt the most when they finally wake up and see things for what they are. We have in office, the most corrupt, ignorant, selfish, irrational administration in history. I will ask the same question Rosie asked a couple weeks ago on The View, "What does it take to get impeached in this country?" It has to be more than lying about a blow job...right? And now I will ask that certain question one more time, the one I will keep asking until I get THE answer we are all waiting for and deserve, "where is Osama Bin Laden? Now excuse me while I go have a deep cleansing cry, a sob really, and try my best to remember September 10th, 2001, when I felt nothing.

As of yesterday, Saturday March 31, 2007...

American Soldiers Killed in Iraq = 3245
American Soldiers Wounded in Iraq = 24, 314


Iraq 101 - Mother Jones (Very detailed article about Iraq, and the true cost of this war).

-OndineMonet

My 30-Minute Rule

"The individual woman is required... a thousand times a day to choose either to accept her appointed role and thereby rescue her good disposition out of the wreckage of her self-respect, or else follow an independent line of behavior and rescue her self-respect out of the wreckage of her good disposition."

-Jeannette Rankin

For the most part I am a pretty flexible, but ever since the good old days of dating, I have had a rule that once applied to all my boyfriends, but which now applies to everyone. It's simple. If I have an appointment with you, I ask that you show up on time. If you can't be on time, because lets face it, sometimes things happen, that's fine, but in that case, I ask you to get to the meeting, or at least call me, within 30 minutes. Period. I think in the year 2007, we have enough availability to phones, that there should be no reason to be late for an appointment, without being able to at least call the other person and explain our circumstances. Sound reasonable? It's easier now, then it was in 1987, to get in touch with someone, and I think I was being reasonable back then.

So, if I am waiting for you, and you don't show up, I will leave, and go onto other things, in the hopes that you are perfectly healthy, but otherwise engaged. Gone are the days where I sit by the phone, wait in the rain, or hope on a star that someone will show up when they promise to. I expect folks to keep their promises and their word. Sometimes in life we have to compromise, but we never have to compromise ourselves. For anyone. If we set a precedent for being treated with disrespect, we should expect to be treated that way from that point after. Sigh. Sometimes stuff happens. I had an appointment to meet someone this past week, and they didn't show up... or call. So, after 30 minutes I left, and drove back across the bay, back home to Berkeley. Frazzled.

It didn't help my mood, to come home to an email that implied that the confusion was partly my fault. As it turns out, after looking up the address where we were supposed to meet in the, San Francisco Merchants Directory, I found out I was 100% correct on the directions I had provided. Sigh. Being 100% correct, doesn't happen often. I wanted to send a really immature email and say... "Here... see... YOU WERE WRONG." But really, what would that have accomplished? In the end... things would still be what they are now. A really nice opportunity left hopeless. Sometimes being right, doesn't help matters one little bit.

By the way, this was the third time this same person had messed up what time we were supposed to meet. The first time I waited by the phone for a phone conference, they didn't call when they said they would. We rescheduled. The second meeting, they said they would call at 12:00, they called 20 minutes early.Then we had this third meeting, which was supposed to be in person. Oh well, I guess they just missed the opportunity to meet and know the wonder that is me. :( It must be the year... I blame it on 2007. This simply isn't my year. Can it be over now?

You tell me. Do you have a rule, for expecting folks to be on time? Do you go about your business if they don't show up? How long do you wait for someone, if you have a set time to meet? Is it just as rude to show up early for an appointment, as it is to show up late? If someone sets a pattern with being irresponsible with time, do you grin and take it, or do you eventually say something? Opinions please.

-OndineMonet

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment # 158: Your Favorite Time Of Day

"It is impossible to believe that all the past is, but the beginning of a beginning, and that all that is and has been, is but the twilight of the dawn. It is possible to believe that all the human mind has ever accomplished is but a dream before the awakening."

-H. G. Wells

Weekend Assignment #158: What's your favorite time of day and why? It doesn't have to be a specific hour and minute, mind you: "early morning" or "sunset" works just fine too. Although if you do have a very specific time, by all means note it.

Extra Credit: What's the longest you've ever stayed awake?

It's an interesting coincidence that John Scalzi chose this topic for this week's edition of the Weekend Assignment, in that my previous entry was basically dedicated to how much I had enjoyed a recent sunrise. :) I enjoyed it so much so, that I have been using the photo I took that morning as a tool in my meditation practices when I need to feel renewed. I do enjoy a pretty, golden sunrise, but I am not a morning person at all. I am a night person, so I guess if I am to share my favorite time of day, I would have to go with the twilight.

Yes, twilight.

The above photo was taken last October, while I was visiting the California coastal town of Cambria. Everything that makes me feel good inside, was so much a part of that day. It was my 16th wedding anniversary, it was October, which is in my favorite season of autumn, I was near the ocean, we had just enjoyed a really delicious meal, and I was with Alan. What more could a girl ask for? Well, how about the perfect sunset, and a guy who understands and loves them as much as I do? :) So we stopped at a nice spot along HWY1 and got out a blanket and our cameras. Sigh. Alan knows I come alive at twilight. We sat together and took photos and snuggled under the blanket, and took photos and snuggled a little more, until the darkness washed all but a small bit of life away. I love the twilight, there is just a romance in it like no other time of day. :)

"What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime. It is the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset."

-Crowfoot

Extra Credit: The longest I have ever been awake is 37 hours. I was a long time ago, when I was about 18 or so. Some friends and I held a game night at our church and we were playing the Monopoly game from HELL. LOL. Alan won by the way. :)

-OndineMonet
"Together At Twilight"
Cambria, California
Moonstone Beach
October, 2006
Twilight

I'll Follow The Sun

"The Sun, with all the planets revolving around it, and depending on it, can still ripen a bunch of grapes as though it had nothing in the Universe to do."

-Galileo Galilei

A couple weeks ago, while on my way to Nevada, I had a chance to see the sun come up for the first time in months. I am usually asleep most mornings around dawn, as I usually go to bed at 5:00 a.m. or so. I had forgotten what I had been missing. The sun makes me feel good, and there is nothing like it's soft, golden radiance on a chilly late winter morning. Close your eyes, and imagine it for a moment. If you did close your eyes, were you able to actually feel the morning sun, shining on you?

Try it again, sit back in your chair, close your eyes, take a long, deep, cleansing breath, and imagine you are sitting in the warmth of the early morning sun. Now tell me, when you opened your eyes, were you smiling? Frowning? Did you feel warm inside? Try it one more time with me. Close your eyes, take two long, cleansing breaths, only this time, tell me what you see, feel, hear, touch, and taste in your imagination. Be aware of where the sun takes you, and let yourself feel it. REALLY feel it.

Did you just create a memory? Did you relive a memory? Did you picture that sunrise where you are right now, or did you transport yourself to another place and time? There is nothing like taking a moment, to clear the mind of clutter, and follow the sun.

I'll Follow The Sun
The Beatles

One day you'll look to see I've gone
For tomorrow may rain, so I'll follow the sun
Some day you'll know I was the one
But tomorrow may rain, so I'll follow the sun
And now the time has come
And so my love I must go
And though I lose a friend
In the end you know, oooh
One day you'll find that I have gone
For tomorrow may rain, so I'll follow the sun
Yes, tomorrow may rain, so I'll follow the sun
And now the time has come
And so my love I must go
And though I lose a friend
In the end you'll know, oooh
One day, you'll find that I have gone
For tomorrow may rain, so I'll follow the sun.

"I love the sweet smell of dawn... our unique daily opportunity to smell time, to smell opportunity...each morning being a new beginning."

-Emme Woodhull-Bache

-OndineMonet
"Looking East"
March 15th, 2007
Early Morning

Self Care For Ingrown Toenails

"Ducking for apples... change one letter and you have the story of my life."

-Dorothy Parker

I'm in a mood. Not a good one mind you. I have this irritation that is, well, irritating me. It's an ingrown toenail. Sheesh. No more ballerina moves for me, not that I was ever that graceful on my two feet, but it would be nice to think that at any given moment, I could spring into a spontaneous pirouette. You know... in case anyone might be watching. You always want an audience for that sort of thing. I wanted to take ballet lessons when I was a little girl, but my mother new better, see, she knew I had taken after my father when it came to my silly little feet. Dad and I both, had silly little flat feet. I managed to make my right foot slightly more interesting by dropping a large can of peach halves in heavy syrup on it in 1991. It hurt. A lot. Then it the bone grew back funky, and left me a tiny little hump on my foot, that can be seen if you look very, very closely. It will be how they identify my body someday, after I am hideously murdered while sitting at an outdoor cafe in London.

Yes. That's how the end will come. I will be killed while eating scones and drinking tea. And reading the London Times. Probably the gardening section, or maybe the Arts and Entertainment section, that part is kind of irrelevant. LOL. The point is, I will have been hideously murdered. It would have to be hideous, if the only way they could ID me is if they looked at the hump on my right foot. Of course, in the mean time, I have this goofy ingrown toenail to tend to. I have to, so my humpy foot won't fall off, because if it did, there would be no way for them to ID my hideously murdered body. But I bet you figured that out... right? ;) Sigh.

We live in marvelous times... don't we? A few years ago, I would have had to go to a special doctor, who would have gotten a big, fat needle, and shot it up under my funky toenail, as if I were some kind of footwear terrorist that he needed vital podiatry information from. He would speak with a thick German accent, and look at me quite sinisterly as he jammed the needle deeply into my poor painful, yet girlishly gorgeous big toe. "OUCH"... I would scream. "OH THE PAIN!... STOP... I WILL TELL YOU ANYTHING!" And I probably would. LOL. Sheesh.

Thank goodness I don't have to go through that, not while the Internet has places like the MayoClinic and WebMD. I looked up a wonderful article tonight on self care for ingrown toenails. A little soaking of my toe in warm salt water, and little lift and separate with some cotton balls, a new pair of sensible shoes, and I will be good to go. Whew! I didn't really want to go to the doctor. Nope, self help worked very well for my nervous breakdown, and now I am just fine, and it will work for this little nuisance too. Right? I mean, can't you tell how much healthier I am, mentally speaking? I haven't wished anyone mad fits of eyeball rolling in nearly 12 hours. Go me! :)

-OndineMonet
"Cold Love"
Yuba Gap, California
March 15th, 2007
Afternoon

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Working Outside

"Be glad of life, because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

-Henry Van Dyke

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Take a picture of people working outside. Because now the weather's right for it (mostly). If you have a photo in your archives of people working outside, that works too.

-John Scalzi (By The Way)

My friend Steven inspired me to choose this photo for the Monday Photo Shoot, he posted a similar photo of a clown just the other day. You can see it here. I admire folks who put on these costumes and advertise for companies. It can't be easy to have folks driving by all day, shouting at you or possibly making fun. I don't know, I think seeing these characters is kinda fun. :) It makes me smile.

Still, folks can be so judgemental sometimes. One day, several years ago, a friend and I were driving down the road, when we came across a similar character, standing on the sidewalk advertising for another restaurant, and she remarked to me something to the effect of, " I don't how some people could lower themselves to take a job like that!." To which I replied, "It's honest work, would you prefer they either starve or sign-up for public assistance?" Sometimes we do what we have to do. Sometimes we take jobs, we don't necessarily aspire to, so we can pay for college or put food on our tables. Sigh. Needless to say, my friend and I had quite a conversation that afternoon.

"Men in general are quick to believe that which they wish to be true."

-Julius Caesar

-OndineMonet
"Hail Caesar"
Castro Valley, California
March 7, 2007
Late Afternoon

Don't Drown

Please click on the above image, to see it in a larger version.

"Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it."

-Charles Dudley Warner

We are due for quite a storm here in the Bay Area. It is supposed to be really rainy and windy, and the lower foothills might get a dusting of snow. That thought makes me smile a bit, because I would like to head back to the Sierra to try for a few more still life shots in the snow. We'll see. I have a lot going on this week. Even with my sore joints and various and usual aches, I enjoy weather, even if I am just staring out the window.

I have a Weather Channel weather indicator installed on the sidebar for this blog, and every once in a while I will hear a little lightning strike sound, which indicates that there is an update to the weather in my area. I was looking at the storm alert earlier today, and noticed it said something kind of strange... "Do not drive into flooded roadways, turn around, don't drown. "Don't Drown?" You have to actually remind folks not to drown? LOL. At first I kinda laughed... at my most dense, I knew enough not to drown if I didn't have to, but then I thought about how that same statement applies to life. "Don't Drown." Suddenly the thought wasn't as amusing to me, when I thought about all the times I let myself metaphorically drown... even when I knew the water level I was in was getting dangerously high.

Ever notice how often, mostly during awkward pauses in casual conversations, the weather will suddenly become a valid, hot topic of interest? Is talking about the weather the perfect "get out" for everyone, because it's something we all have in common, no matter who we are? How often do you feel yourself, thinking in terms of how the weather is affecting your life at any given moment? I mean in terms beyond the obvious. As an example, my year, 2007, has gotten off to a proper wintry start all around, but as the year has been progressing, I see the sun trying it's best to give me a little glimpse of life beyond the immediate cold. I live in the Bay Area, which means we have the added weather attraction of micro climates. Just because it's warm and breezy in Berkeley, doesn't mean it will be in Oakland, or Sausalito. Our weather can turn rather quickly. So can life.

I can remember moments... sometimes months... when I was most certainly drowning. Drowning in avoidance, drowning in my photography, drowning in sorrow, drowning in longing for someone I love, drowning in blogging,drowning inside myself, drowning life. Yeah... drowning in life in general, which almost always meant I would rather be drowning in whatever was filling my time, rather then what, or sometimes who was making me feel the weather. Sigh. Sometimes a good friend would see me metaphorically drowning, and throw me a lifeline. "Dummy," said my friend, " you're drowning, don't you have enough sense to come in from the water?" "No, it hadn't ocurred to me to not drown, but just for the sake of argument, how did you know I was drowning?" "I was paying attention to the indicators," said my friend.

We all have weather in common, don't we? Do we always notice it? Do we see it in others? Do we see it in ourselves? Shrug. Like life, the weather is what it is. We never really know about it, what the future has in store, how the micro climate might change, but we can give it our best guess, and if we do find ourselves on a rainy stretch of road we didn't see coming, we can make the decision to turn around, and not drown. Right? ;)

-OndineMonet

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #157: Exploring The Fridge

"Never pride yourself on knowledge. Remember; even a head of iceberg lettuce knows more than you do. It knows whether or not that light really does go out when the refrigerator door shuts."

-Unknown

Weekend Assignment#157: So, what's in your refrigerator? Be honest. If you include a picture of the current state of the fridge, that'd be nifty.

Extra Credit: What's the oldest thing in the fridge?

-John Scalzi (By The Way)

What's in my fridge? It's not all that exciting. When I opened it up yesterday, I took a long, objective look, and concluded, there wasn't nearly enough chocolate as there should be. There was however, lots of nice fruit, and salad mix. Some really tasty yogurt. Soda, both leaded and non-leaded. Because both Alan and I love to cook, there was quite a few interesting bottles and jars of exotic sauces, and condiments, not to mention 5 kinds of olives, and 14 different kinds of cheese. LOL. Yep, you read correct, 14 different kinds of cheese. :) We like cheese very much. Cheese makes the world go round. Cheese is our friend. Of course man, or woman, does not live by cheese alone, so below you will find a somewhat complete list of the items, which currently exist in my fridge, give or take a wheel of cheese...

14 kinds of cheese
2 bottles of Pepsi products
6 Yoplait Yogurt
2 bags of Fresh Express Salad Mix
1 Avocado
2 bottles of Lea & Perrin's steak sauce
1 Torani White Chocolate sauce
4 bottles Kraft Salad dressing
1 (24 pk.) Large eggs
1 Arm & Hammer baking soda
6 Kern's Fruit Nectar
1 jar spiced crab apples
1 pkg, Hillshire Farms Lil' Smokies
1 bottle BullsEye BBQ sauce
1 4pk. Kirkland unsalted butter
1 Country Crock Pumpkin Butter

Extra Credit: The oldest thing in my fridge, is probably the jar of spiced crab apples, I bought 2 years ago. :) The "use by" date gives me 2 more years. :)

-OndineMonet
"Fridge"
Berkeley, California
March 23, 2007
Late Evening

Not So Much A Bombshell, More Like A Hand Grenade

"I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed my hair."

-Bette Davis

I told you I take my camera everywhere. Tee Hee. Last weekend, I finally treated myself to that "day of me" I had planned. I had my coupon from Supercuts for a free haircut, and my coupon from, La Salsa, for a free, Overstuffed Grilled Burrito, and I was all set. I picked a lovely cut, like the one actress, Diane Lane, wears, and I was all set to go blond, till I got into the chair at Supercuts, and fell into the panic attack from hell! Words that hadn't occurred to me previously, such as, BLEACH, BRITTLE, LOSS OF HAIR, UNNATURAL, were swirling about my ears and brain. "Ummmmm.... gulp.... just make me look like Diane Lane. OK?" LOL

Hmmm? Will Alan be disappointed that a blond bombshell wouldn't be coming through the door that night? "I am such a chicken," I thought to myself. Sigh. As I looked through the color book, I pondered, I fretted, I sighed long, indecisive sighs, until I came across a color I liked very much, "Sunny Auburn." Sounded like a nice day in autumn, and come to find out, it wasn't a whole lot different from my natural color, at least as it appeared when I was in my 20's, or what I like to call my... "pre-gray-haired-nervous-breakdown-years." My late thirties were interesting to say the least. LOL. But I have put that time behind me now. :) Sometimes it's so hard to let go of pain, of loss, grief can be a comfortable place after a while. I know it sounds strange, but it was true for me. I had no idea how far I had climbed into myself. Oh well, like I said, that is all behind me.

I like who I see in the mirror. I like my new hair. I feel secure inside my own skin, and confident in who I am. I have my days, don't get me wrong, but I am OK and happy and every day I get the old me, the confident me, back. It was nice to sit alone, over my freebie lunch, and consider where life has taken me, since the last time I visited a salon, 7 years earlier. First of all, had it really been 7 years? Yep, it had. Sigh. I missed a lot while I was on my vacation from living. The Internet has been instrumental in my recovery, but I have a hunger for living more in the "real world." To meet more people, who don't live in a box on my desk.

Please don't misunderstand, I wouldn't trade the experiences I have had, and friends I have made on the NET for anything, but there is nothing like hearing someones voice, or looking into someones eyes, hearing laughter, feeling rain on my face. Is there anything better than the sound of a friend saying, "I love you?" I felt pretty good when I got home from my special day. When I walked through the door, I said to Alan, "Honey, I am not quite the bombshell you expected, I'm more like a hand grenade." To which he replied, "You look lovely, a little like Diane Lane, and besides, a hand grenade going off in my hand can knock me off my feet as well." LOL. Oh Alan! LOL. Sometimes I get the feeling he kinda likes me! ;)

Glamour...

My former long hair, in a pile on the floor. :(

Is there anything better then a sale on hair care products? :)

I thought about getting the "Spector" look. Nah. :)

Does anyone else think that one bear looks a lot like Phil Spector?

My new color "Sunny Auburn"

This is the style I finally chose. Alan says I kinda look like Diane Lane now. I really like Alan! :)

Music Legend Phil Spector's Murder Trial Begins (ABC News)

-OndineMonet
"Heads On A Shelf"
Berkeley, California
March 17, 2007
Afternoon

At Every Turn

"I will need your support, and I will work to earn it. I will do all I can do to deserve your trust."

-George W. Bush

Earn our trust?

"The most important thing is for us to find Osama Bin Laden. It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him."

-George W. Bush, 9/13/2001

"So, I don't know where he is. You know, I just don't spend that much time on him... to be honest with you."

-George W. Bush, 3/13/2002

"Uhh gosh, I don't think I ever said I am not worried about Osama Bin Laden. It's kind of one of those... uhhh, exaggerations."

-George W. Bush 10/ 13/ 2004


It doesn't surprise me that the Bush administration is fighting tooth and nail to avoid giving sworn testimony before the senate, regarding the ousting of 8 federal prosecutors. Bush and company are liars. We all know that... right? I think we will be seeing even more examples of their corruption of office come to light, before he finally does us all a favor and slithers back to Texas. In the mean time, the administration is lying, and they are using the office they were elected to, to hide their long list of misdeeds. Ok, what I said was strongly put, but if there is no smoking gun, if they really did nothing wrong, why run and hide from testifying? And doesn't it make a lot more sense now, as to why George W. Bush tried so very hard to get Harriet Miers confirmed to the Supreme Court? A nominee, so lacking in experience in constitutional law, that it left even some members of the republican party shaking their heads. Ok, now it all makes sense. Executive privilege does have it's privileges... doesn't it?

So you want to earn my trust George? Turn Miers and Rove over to the senate for sworn testimony. Find Osama Bin Laden, not just his flunkies. Keep your promise to rebuild New Orleans. Bring our military home... NOW. Stop messing around with the constitution, and oh yeah... STOP LYING!

Ok, your turn. Opinions please. Do you think the White House has something to hide in regards to the firing of the federal prosecutors?

-OndineMonet

Neither Emotions Nor Conflicts

"Flowers are restful to look at. They have neither emotions nor conflicts."

-Sigmund Freud

The tulips at the Queen Wilhelmina Garden, in Golden Gate Park, is gorgeous right now. Tulips everywhere, and in my favorite color combination, yellow and pink. Every spring it is a different color of tulip to look forward to, right now it is spectacular. Alan and I are going back next week to have lunch there, I wasn't really on my game today with the camera. Sometimes getting out with the camera after therapy is, well, therapeutic. Sometimes... sigh... I should just put the camera down, and enjoy the view in front of me. That's the thing about taking pictures, occasionally it comes down to the photo, or the memory. There's no shame in choosing the memory over the moment, you just come back later, when you are ready to focus.

-OndineMonet
"Beautiful"
Golden Gate Park
San Francisco, Ca
March 21, 2007
Afternoon