Saturday, March 24, 2007

Not So Much A Bombshell, More Like A Hand Grenade

"I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed my hair."

-Bette Davis

I told you I take my camera everywhere. Tee Hee. Last weekend, I finally treated myself to that "day of me" I had planned. I had my coupon from Supercuts for a free haircut, and my coupon from, La Salsa, for a free, Overstuffed Grilled Burrito, and I was all set. I picked a lovely cut, like the one actress, Diane Lane, wears, and I was all set to go blond, till I got into the chair at Supercuts, and fell into the panic attack from hell! Words that hadn't occurred to me previously, such as, BLEACH, BRITTLE, LOSS OF HAIR, UNNATURAL, were swirling about my ears and brain. "Ummmmm.... gulp.... just make me look like Diane Lane. OK?" LOL

Hmmm? Will Alan be disappointed that a blond bombshell wouldn't be coming through the door that night? "I am such a chicken," I thought to myself. Sigh. As I looked through the color book, I pondered, I fretted, I sighed long, indecisive sighs, until I came across a color I liked very much, "Sunny Auburn." Sounded like a nice day in autumn, and come to find out, it wasn't a whole lot different from my natural color, at least as it appeared when I was in my 20's, or what I like to call my... "pre-gray-haired-nervous-breakdown-years." My late thirties were interesting to say the least. LOL. But I have put that time behind me now. :) Sometimes it's so hard to let go of pain, of loss, grief can be a comfortable place after a while. I know it sounds strange, but it was true for me. I had no idea how far I had climbed into myself. Oh well, like I said, that is all behind me.

I like who I see in the mirror. I like my new hair. I feel secure inside my own skin, and confident in who I am. I have my days, don't get me wrong, but I am OK and happy and every day I get the old me, the confident me, back. It was nice to sit alone, over my freebie lunch, and consider where life has taken me, since the last time I visited a salon, 7 years earlier. First of all, had it really been 7 years? Yep, it had. Sigh. I missed a lot while I was on my vacation from living. The Internet has been instrumental in my recovery, but I have a hunger for living more in the "real world." To meet more people, who don't live in a box on my desk.

Please don't misunderstand, I wouldn't trade the experiences I have had, and friends I have made on the NET for anything, but there is nothing like hearing someones voice, or looking into someones eyes, hearing laughter, feeling rain on my face. Is there anything better than the sound of a friend saying, "I love you?" I felt pretty good when I got home from my special day. When I walked through the door, I said to Alan, "Honey, I am not quite the bombshell you expected, I'm more like a hand grenade." To which he replied, "You look lovely, a little like Diane Lane, and besides, a hand grenade going off in my hand can knock me off my feet as well." LOL. Oh Alan! LOL. Sometimes I get the feeling he kinda likes me! ;)


My former long hair, in a pile on the floor. :(

Is there anything better then a sale on hair care products? :)

I thought about getting the "Spector" look. Nah. :)

Does anyone else think that one bear looks a lot like Phil Spector?

My new color "Sunny Auburn"

This is the style I finally chose. Alan says I kinda look like Diane Lane now. I really like Alan! :)

Music Legend Phil Spector's Murder Trial Begins (ABC News)

"Heads On A Shelf"
Berkeley, California
March 17, 2007


Laura said...

you tease, you!
i want to see a pic of you.
the hair on the floor made me's okay, i do that all the time when my girls get their hair cut.
now you must show us all your lovely locks, soon!

Suzanne R said...

Okay, so now I know who Phil Spector is. LOL! And no, I can't see you with his hairdo. ;-) The color is beautiful -- would love to see the front of your head with your new do. I've always thought Alan sounded like a keeper, too, and now I'm sure. :-)

sunflowerkat said...

Carly, I LOVE that color!

I'm a hair salon chicken too. Too many bad cuts that were just supposed to be trims. What I wouldn't give to find someone who I REALLY trusted with the scissors.

I also have never had the nerve to color my hair. It's getting so NEEDS to be done.

I admre your courage.