Mind Prisons

 "Only what slips through one's fingers, only what is never expressed in words, has no thoughts, exists completely. That is the price of proximity if you don't see it. Don't know that it's there. Then it's over, then you see it."

-Karl Ove Knausgard 

Autumn

Yesterday, Alan and I took a drive to Folsom, California, to have a look around the Historic district. We got going a little later than we had intended too, so we didn't have a lot of time to spend there, or visit the tourist sites much, but we did stop by Folsom Prison, for a few minutes, to check the hours at the prison museum. Unfortunately, it was closed for repairs. It was impossible to see the prison, without thinking about the possible legal problems of the current president. I think he thinks about it too, even as he knowingly creates events that could infect folks with Covid-19, aka, super spreader events. A likelihood so possible, that he makes attendees sign a release that says they won't sue him if they contract the disease. Sometimes it seems like he breaks at least one law a day... maybe two. You know him, and history does also, and will not be kind. This place could very will be his new home one day, and Mara-Lago it isn't. He was just bellowing again last night about locking up, among others, Joe Biden. Old bullshit, different day. He thinks he will be able to talk his way out of his problems should an arrest happen, should he be indicted. I am sure his psychotic narcissism wont let him think anything else. So, what happens when the real world, the world he doesn't get to script, doesn't live up to his expectations? When he finally has to answer for what he's done? And are the rest of us ready for it? Are we in mind prisons as well?

~Carly

October 17th 2020

Stockton, California

 

Autumn Memories

 

"Night, which in Autumn seems to fall

 from the sky so suddenly, chilled us."

~Jules Barey d' Auervilly

The Crimson Curtain

 

My Fibromyalgia had me in so much pain yesterday, that I did very little about roaming around in the autumn sun. Today, I am hoping to visit Lodi Lake, and perhaps Historic Folsom. Two places I have never been, but offer me a chance to climb out of my own head of political nonsense, and see the world around me. It's a sad thing to waste a beautiful sunny autumn day because of mental garbage. So, if you are reading this, do me a favor, visit the world around you today, even if you just look up to the sky, and acknowledge the October blue sunshine. We never know what next October will be like, so never miss the freedom to enjoy October day!

 

October's From The Past

 

Carson City, Nevada 2017

Nevada City, 2017

Danville, California, 2013

 

Carson City, 2005

 

Virginia City, Nevada, 2005

 

San Ramon, California, 2005

 

Carson City, Carroll, 2005

 

 

Today's Autumn Leaf Of The Day

 

~Carly

Stockton, California

October 16th 2020

 

 

 

Let There Be Autumn Light

 

 

"It was a beautiful bright autumn day,

 with air like cider and sky so blue you could drown in it."

~Diana Gabaldon

Outlander

Few words. I am really tired. So tired that my body is screaming. I am not sleeping again. Yesterday, when I had been up well over 24 hours, I decided it might be a good idea to begin chasing down some autumn, first in Ione, second in Apple Hill. Bad idea! LOL. Not only did I find very little in autumn color, but it only served to exhaust me even more, but I did get a few nice shots in Ione. My little tree, just to the side of the downtown, has never let me down. It's still producing lovely leaves, and from year to year, I am never sure what color will be prominent, so it's always an adventure. This year it's red! A power color! Hopefully that's a good omen as well. We will overcome all this. We will be strong, and I will sleep again. Maybe as soon as November. 

~Carly

October 15th 2020

Stockton, California

 

Art About Town: Stockton... "Sea Blue, Celadon And Amber Chandelier"

 

"There is something incredibly nostalgic

 about the annual cascade of autumn leaves."

~Joe L. Wheeler

Look... A beautiful new piece of Public Art, and I found it in what seemed like an unlikely place, the Stockton Administrative Building, in downtown. I was there last Monday, to drop off my ballot for the 2020 election. Don't worry, that post is coming up in a few days, because of course I have something to say, and you know me, I never miss a chance a to talk politics! Anyway, in the lobby of the building was this marvelous piece of art. It reminded me of a beautiful autumn beacon, lighting the way. A good omen I think. A sign that this autumn is going to be okay. That November 3rd will be okay. That Joe Biden and Kamala Harris will lead us out of this depressing, and terrifying time that was this administrations term of office.

 Yes, I know, it wasn't installed yesterday. It was actually dedicated in 2009, but it's the first time I have seen it. In 2016 Alan dropped off our ballots, and he did it again last March, so Monday was my first time visiting the Registrar Of Voters. Since moving here, I have been in a self-imposed mental prison about living in Stockton, but I am okay now. The sadness of leaving the Bay Area has healed, and I am feeling like my old self, despite the depression Donald Trump inspires. Hopefully that nightmare is almost over. The anti-depressants have helped, but the help I have really needed came from the goddess of autumn, and some inspiring autumn Public Art like this! How will Public Art help unseat Trump? It won't. But what it does do is help improve my mood, as we prepare for what might be.

 Right now things feel like we have a real chance to see an autumn corrective coming. I know he is going to throw every dirty trick in the book at it, try to hurt us, and the nation, but I feel like, in the end, we have a good chance. I'm not thinking about it too much. I just want to get through the next 20 days. Just let it go by and get to November 3rd. Although there is a little piece of me, the frightened part of me, that does occasionally visit the dark place. The place that makes me believe that Monday, November 2nd, might be the last day we see as free Americans. I suppose it's not very healthy to spend too much time in either season, which is fine, I would rather spend my time in autumn and art. That's where I am at peace.

Sea Blue, Celadon And Amber Chandelier 

By Artist Dale Chihuly

Autumn inspiration from January 14th 2020

My Chandelier...

Today's Autumn Leaf Of The Day #23

~Carly

October 14th 2020

Stockton, California

30 Years Of Us

 

"I always wake up smiling... I think it's your fault."

~Anonymous

Thirty years ago today, we said, "I do". And we have been together ever since. Through good and bad. Broke and prosperous, it's been he and me. Our hearts shattered when we lost the best cat ever, Elvis, but our hearts were filled with happiness when we found Hendrix! He adopted Alan, at first look, and then he immediately walked over to me, and assured me that I was loved too. That's the kind of cat that Alan attracts. Soon we brought home Dylan, and then years later, we found Joey, abandoned and lost. Scared. Injured, but Alan gave him a can of food, coaxed him over, and soon he was on his way home with us, and has been our littlest joy ever since. We never had human children, but we have the children we both wanted. Little ones who needed us, and we are definitely, Mom and Dad! There is a lot of love in our home, and I pray we have 30 more year together! My goodness, that is going to be a lot of cats!

 

I Love You, Alan!

Happy Anniversary, Baby!

Today's Autumn Leaf Of The Day #22

 

~Carly

October 13th 2020

Stockton, California

Autumn Serendipty

 

"Seamless like a Fall leaf changing color,

 my will switched powerfully."

~Aspen Matis

Your Blue Is Not My Blue: A Missing Person Memoir

I found this little creature on the sidewalk, Saturday, in Sacramento. As I looked down, I saw what seemed to me, that it was crying a leaf. I don't know what the creature is, perhaps a teddy bear or a bunny, but it struck a cord with me. Sometimes I become sad just after the beginning of autumn, because I know autumn has to end . But if I had my way, it would never end! Anyway, I picked up the leaf and turned it over, and it seemed like the leaf was smiling at me, so I made it the Leaf Of The Day. Autumn sometimes brings the most amazing moments of serendipity. It's there... just look for it!

Carly

Stockton California

October 12th 2020

 

Vacation... Day One

 

"Falling In Love With October"

By Charmaine J. Forde

Leaves descending to the ground,

Orange, magenta, green and brown.

The cool crisp breezes in the air,

Autumn season must be here." 

Day one of our vacation, began with a visit to Sacramento to hunt for leaves at Crocker Museum. I usually make visits there between September and January, because there are so many varieties of beautiful trees around the city. In fact, Sacramento used to be called the City Of Trees, but in recent years it has taken on a new nickname, and is now known as the, Farm To Folk Capitol, which is kinda cool, because of the importance of locally grown foods.

 Yesterday was my first visit for the year, and I ended up with four or five different species of leaves. For some added beauty there was a horse drawn carriage from Old Sacramento, and a few new pieces of public art, which I will be sharing soon. Sacramento is not as exciting as San Francisco, and it wouldn't be fair to wish that it was. It has it's own vibe, that includes a lot more public art, a fact that makes me very happy! And, of course Sacramento has leaves, lots and lots of leaves, which makes it pretty much perfect for me.

~Carly

October 11th 2020

Stockton, California

A Life Lived In Autumn

 

"She embodied all the melancholy of autumn. She has learned to cherish with mournful tenderness of a past she dares not remember."

Renee Vivien

A Woman Appeared To Me

A few days ago, I stepped onto the porch, to fetch the mail, when I noticed this beautiful moth resting on the support beam that is closest to the mailbox. It was so tiny, less than the size of a dime, that I am surprised that I actually saw it. But there it was, the little spot of absolute beauty. Of all the moths and butterflies I have photographed, this one, the Wavy-lined Emerald moth, is certainly one of the most unique, and photogenic. The shade of green is breathtaking, and the white lines and the fringe remind me of a dress from the Art Deco era. The little winged friend stayed for a couple days, but by yesterday it was gone. Its made me a little sad, because I enjoyed meeting it, and learning about what its about, but I suppose it was ready to off and enjoy autumn. The life span of butterflies and moths is so short, but that amazing creature was lucky enough to live it's whole life in autumn. I think I am, perhaps, a bit jealous, but also happy that I met a little bit of autumn magic this week.

 

 

~Carly

October 10th 2020

Stockton, California

#18 Autumn Leaf Of The Day

"Just as a painter needs light in order to put the finishing touches to his picture, so I need an inner light, which I feel I never have enough of in the autumn."

~Leo Tolstoy 

I'm tired. History will document why. But you already know from what I said just then. I am tired. And it feels like I will never not be tired again. Like it's too later to every find my energy, or regain peace of mind. I want to pain to stop, and I am hoping our vacation will help. I still have that hope. Autumn. Vacation. And hope.

~Carly

Stockton, California

October 9th 2020

 

The Pence/Harris Debate October 7th 2020

 

"Skill at debate is not the same as maturity."

~ Ted Chiang

Exhalation:Stories

 Well, right off I can say last night's Pence/Harris debate wasn't the shitshow that the first Trump/Biden debate was, but then no one was expecting it to be. What it was, however, was an actual, mostly by the book, debate! Strange, I know, because the political dialog in America has gone so far off the rails in recent years, that it's almost unrecognizable. So how is it possible that those two managed to hold a fairly reasonable debate? I don't really know! I have heard reality tv described as human cockfighting, and if that's true, it's pretty fair to say our "reality tv president" made sure American politics was too. But Pence, while pretty much as big a liar as Trump, does seem to balance the ticket out by being Trump's clean-up man, so he is a bit more crafty with his lying style. And what a good job he does at that. Condescending. Smug. Trumpian ass kisser extraordinaire. All virtues that turns "Mother" (Karen Pence) on, I'm sure, but at the end of the day, I am pretty confident that while, Pence did his very best, most folks watching know exactly what was what. Kamala Harris won the debate, easily, by not lying, and making their platform clear.

The Moderator, Susan Page, Washington Bureau Chief for, USA Today, lost her patience more than once with V.P. Pence who was, lking over Harris, using more time then was allotted to him, and cutting Harris before she was finished answering questions, she also at times allowed both to engage in that behavior, at times, but to be honest, that behavior has pretty much occurred in most political debates I have viewed in my life. She wasn't the complete pushover Fox New's Chris Wallace was, but she actually didn't do a really good job of moderating either. There are two more scheduled debates between Joe Biden and Donald Trump, and I would like to see the moderator... I don't know... moderate. History will write this chapter too. It's not even a done deal that the next debate will take place, in that Donald Trump was diagnosed with Covid-19, just last weekend. 

So there's that.

 Joe Biden is refusing to attend the next debate, if Trump is still testing positive, and rightly so. Trump has been conducting himself like a miracle has already happened, and he has beaten the disease, despite unhinged tweeting and weird videos to prove there is nothing wrong. Trump is currently at 20,000 lies for his presidency, so believing he is well, is pretty difficult at best. Politicians lie, as do tv reality stars, but he is truly special in his star power as a liar. He has never seemed particularly stable, but since being prescribed the steroids to fight the Covid-19 infec thetion, he seems more unstable than usual, which is saying something. As we move closer to the election I am afraid his mental health will only continue to deteriorate. But his lashing out at all of us, at some point, has been my fear since he took office in January of 2017. But like everything else, it's out of all of our control. And that's a horrible feeling.

So, I guess my take away from the debate is this. I have even more respect for Senator Kamala Harris then I did before. I am very sure of my choice of she and Joe Biden to lead our county, but, in truth, I would have voted for a whoever made it to the top of the ticket. Elizabeth Warren was my first choice. I voted for her in the primary. She didn't win the nomination. Joe Biden did and I am more than okay with that. I know he is ready to lead. I know he won't get us killed. I know he wouldn't have chosen Kamala Harris, if he wasn't sure she was ready to lead as vice president, she is ready, should he ever need to hand powers over to her because he cannot serve. We (America) have maturity, stabiliy, and intelligence ready to lead us out of the darkest time I remember as an American. I wish I could list all the times and reasons why Ive gone to bed, in the last four years, crying or scared to death, despondent, depressed, or suffering from a stress induced headache, because I was afraid to look away.

I don't expect Joe Biden and Kamala Harris to solve my problems, they can't, and anyone who believes it's their job too, has NO idea what politics is, or how it works. I don't expect things to change overnight and suddenly there will only be only sunny days, and autumn for the next 12 months. Nothing is perfect, and there is a lot of cleaning up to do, after all the damage of the last four years. I don't even expect to not be wearing a mask a year from now. The Covid-19 pandemic is now going to be around a while, but I do expect to experience a lot less political stress overall. In fact, while my support for Biden and Harris will remain steadfast after they take office, I plan to back away from obsessing on politics. I was always into politics, it was a subject dad and I could talk about it at length, but it's now just one more thing Donald Trump managed to ruin for me. And the ironic thing... he has no idea what it is, or how it is done. He just treats everyone, and every issue, the way he has is whole life, like it only matters if it profits him. 

Forgive the picture I chose, of Mike Pence, for this post. It was such a strange moment when that fly landed on his head during the debate. It's the off beat moments in life that I sometimes remember the clearest. That's admittedly, my immaturity at work. It's just the type of thing that Alan and I, and some on Twitter, would have put on their, Apocalyptic Bingo cards. Unfortunately, I didn't see that coming! Why would a fly be in the debate hall, when the powers that be, were going to such lengths to make sure it was safe and sanitary? They put up not one, but two sheets of plexiglass between Pence and Harris! So how and why was there a fly? And it landed on Pence? It was just one more joke on all of us, by 2020. And to think, it's not done with us yet!

 

Pence Pic is by the funniest Tom Cruise impersonator around. Visit "Not Tom Cruise" on Twitter! @Not_TomCruise

~Carly

October 8th 2020

Stockton, California

Halloween Facts And Trivia

 "Did you know that at one time trick-or-treating was stopped? It's true. During World War II children were not allowed to trick-or-treat because there was a sugar shortage."

~Linda Bozzo

Kooky Halloween Jokes To Tickle Your Funny Bone

Just to be fun I thought I might try something different and do a post about trivia surrounding Halloween. See if you knew these facts.

1. Halloween goes back more than 2,000 years.

It was originally the pre-Christian Celtic festival called Samhain, which means 'summer's end."

2. Americans spend about 86.27 on Halloween every year.

3.  Illinois produces up to five time more pumpkins than any other state.

4. Fear of Halloween is called, "Samhainophobia".

5. Tootsie Rolls were the first wrapped penny candy.

6. The movie, Halloween, was made in only 21 days.

7. The first Jack O' Lanterns were actually made from turnips.

8. "Souling" is a medieval Christian precursor to modern day trick-or-treating. On Hallowmas (Nov 1st) the poor would go door to door offering prayers for the dead in exchange for soul cakes. 

9. Harry Houdini died October 31st 1926.

10. A child born on Halloween is said to have the ability to take to spirits.

Autumn Leaf Of The Day #16

~Carly

October 7th 2020

Stockton, California