Whispering... It Will Be Better!

 "Hope smiles from the threshold of the year to come,

 whispering, 'It will be happier'... ."

~Alfred Lord Tennyson

It's the last day of 2020... whew... I made it! Alan and I made it! We are okay, we didn't get Covid-19, despite the surging numbers in San Joaquin County, Covidiots in the wild, like the couple I spotted at Walmart, while we shopped for Thanksgiving dinner and selfish co-workers Alan has to work with! We have done all we could to keep ourselves free of the virus. We both wear a mask when we leave the house, and we wash our hands often, but there is a new mutation of Covid-19 that is 70% more transmissible than previous strains, so who knows what we can do now to avoid it. This mutation was first identified in England, and surprise, Donald Trump did not do a thing about temporarily halting travel from that part of the world! He knew this was happening, thank God Prime Minister Boris Johnson told the truth about this strain. All it took was his own diagnosis of Covid-19 earlier in 2020, to make him see the light!

Anyway, I was looking back through my image folders from 2020 to maybe do a post with my favorite photos from the year, but I decided to just post the photos that were most important. I narrowed those down to those which dealt with two main catagories... Politics and the pandemic. As important as this years politics was, especially to me, it was the pandemic that effected me the most profoundly. I have spent the better part of the last four years living in fear of Donald Trump, and what he was capable of doing with all the power he was handed in 2016, but it was Covid-19 that outdid him when it came to deadly potential. Unfortunately, Trump and Covid-19 ended up becoming codependent. They have been quite the team!

 

I wanted to make the post about my joy over the win of Joe Biden and Kamala Harris, because believe me I do feel that joy, but I just couldn't! So, these are the photos that stuck with me. The signs reminding us in California that there were simple things we could do to stop the spread. Unfortunately, residents of San Joaquin county, the county I live in, still have a problem doing the simplest of things to help themselves, and those around them. Oh well, you can't fix stupid. Right? So, forward, march. 2021 will begin in less than 24 hours, and personally, I don't plan to look back. But, I do have an album on Google that will document the year in photographs, all the words worth mentioning will be documented in history. As for my personal 2020 history, there are moments good and bad I won't forget, like how I burst into tears of joy, upon learning Joe Biden had chosen Kamala Harris as his running mate. I slept so good for several nights after that. It was a relief I can't really describe, but alas it did not last, it was broken by some scary, bonehead move Trump did, that I don't even remember now. Strange how Trump moments bleed into each other like that!

2021 will be happier. I will do more photography. I will learn more about birds. I will finally fullfill a lifelong ambition of baking a Lady Baltimore cake from scratch. I will read a book that has nothing to do with politics, although it might be a historical biography. I will get my health back on track, and drop some of the Trump weight I have gained. 15 pounds might be good! I will keep a more realistic schedule. I will disengage from all the doom and gloom. I will stay informed, but I will not go back into drowning in politics. I will finish the home improvement projects we have started, and I will spend more time with Alan than I do with Trump. Trust me, my worrying over Trump killing all of us, took over a huge part of my life. I can't get that time back, but I can march into 2021 with my eyes focused on the future. These ideas are not resolutions mind you, they are just my idea of hope.

 

 My favorite Leaf Of The Day

Stockton, California

October 10th 2020

 Nikon

 

 

 

One Last Sunset But Two More Leaves

"The Harvester was the rustling of autumn leaves,

 there one minute, gone the next."

 

~Jolene Haley

Harrowed

 

The last autumn sunset of 2020. No autumn moved as fast as this one did, and yes, I know, I say that every year, but this one really did! Maybe it was the anticipation for it to get here, or maybe it was because I was distracted by the election, Hell, it might have been because of my new hobby of bird watching, I don't know which, but it went by really fast! Oh well. Goodnight, autumn. Thank you for all the peace of mind you brought me this year. I will be waiting for you!

While it might be the last sunset's of autumn, there will still be one more autumn leaf to be seen. Autumn doesn't officially end until 3:02 am Monday morning, so why short change the season, right autumn?

 

 ~Carly

Stockton, California

December 20th 2020

 

Mid-Century Judgement Call

 

"By late autumn the yard would grow thick with fallen leaves causing the landlady to heave many deep sighs."

 

~Takashi Hiraide

The Guest Cat

 

I love seeing big piles of leaves. I know. I know, not if I had to rake them up. True, it would be some work, I'm not disputing that. And yes, I have some physical challenges now that would make that difficult, but it wouldn't be impossible, and I know my mood would be improved daily, just by having fully blooming autumn trees in the yard! I say it every year, but I really want to plant some trees this year. I really want that promise of beauty all my own. The only challenge to doing so, is availability of the trees. Open nurseries, and of course, money to do it all right! If there is a Santa Claus, he will slip a great big Lowe's gift card in my sock. Shrug. I can remember when I requested Boyd's Teddy Bears. LOL. I think that was about five years ago.

 

Anyway, about the sign. I have passed it many times on my way around Stockton, and it always makes my head tilt, because it reminds me of the lines in lettering from mid-century signs I have been collecting, and it has the colors, although they photographed a bit different here, but it gives me pause because it's not really perfect. Like maybe it's more of a, in the style of, as opposed to genuine mid-century signage. Shrug. I don't know. I have no real way of knowing when that particular shopping center was established. I assume it was at about the same time that my home was built, which was in 1962, the same year as my birth. In fact, my house has only had three owners, including us, and it was sold to the first owner, on my birthday in 1962! That's how I know there are not nearly enough trees in the yard, this place was meant to be mine one day. I'm going with the sign, but I will still continue to search for information, because sometimes you accidentally come across other amazing facts about stuff, so it's all good!

 

 

 

~Carly

Stockton, California

December 18th 2020

 

Her Happiest Season

 "Autumn was her happiest season. There was an expectancy about it's sounds and shapes: the distant thunk pomp of leather and young bodies on the practice field near her house made her think of bands and cold Coca-Cola, parched peanuts and the sight of people's breath in the air. There was even something to look forward to when school started... renewals of old feuds and friendships, weeks of learning again what one half forgot in the long summer. Fall was hot... supper time with everything to eat one missed in the morning when too sleepy to enjoy it."

~Harper Lee

Go Set A Watchman

Look at that sunset. I took that photo, as the sun was setting over the Altamont Pass, at the end of a very good day. It was December 5th, a beautiful day, that had all of the gifts autumn could possibly provide. We were on our way home from the Bay Area, after a long day out, and I was tired from the day, which is a good thing, but I just had to have that sunset. Spending a day with the camera makes me happy, but spending the day with the camera, and returning home tired from it, makes me ecstatic! It means I saw beauty, and even if I only manage to refill my file only a bit, I am usually happy, because it means I took my time and really put thought into my surroundings. 

 

You would think that would be a given... right? Well, yes and no. Sometimes I just can't break through my own relentless head noise. And sometimes the ambient light looks one way in the car, and another way at curbside or even deep on the rice patties, depending on if I am photographing some curbside art, autumn leaves, or Sandhill Cranes. Photography is never the same twice. You can prep in a general sense, but I can't count the number of times I have packed all my requirement. Light meters. Tripods. Cameras. Headed for a location, only to find that I had to fight some unforeseen circumstance, be it natural or man-made. Self made catastrophes happen too, like forgetting my small wallet that contains extra SD cards. That's happened an embarrassing amount of times. That's the difference between an amateur and pro, I guess. But, even with all of the work, mental and physical, it's worth it, no matter what season we are in!

Every year I photograph somewhere between 100 and 500 autumn leaves. About 91 become, Leaves Of The Day, and the remaining are used in other projects, while some are never featured anywhere. Last year was a really difficult year for my project. I couldn't find much color during autumn, in fact most of it took place during winter of this year. It was such a difficult year I wasn't sure we would get through it, but we did, and I was glad I had saved some leaves back in case. This year was a much different story, and I have decided that beginning this year, I will share as many of the unused leaves as possible, because like the featured ones, they are what the life of the year was about. California lost so many trees in 2020, to wildfires, or drought conditions. Climate Change is affecting and diminishing the  color and life of California. It's painful to watch. I don't know what the state will look like in 10 years. It may look more like autumn in upstate New York, which would be amazing, or it could be treeless, I don't know, but one thing is for sure, the state is going through big changes, so the history of autumn 2020 means a lot to me. It is my happiest season.

The Leaves Of Autumn 2020

And Today's Featured Leaf Of The Day

#87

~Carly

Stockton, California

December 17th 2020

 

Pack Up All My Cares And Woes...

"We never know which lives we influence, or when, or why.

 Not until the future eats the present, anyway.

 We know when it's too late."

 

~Stephen King

 11/22/63

 

... Blackbird Bye-Bye

 

 I was in the East Bay last week on business, so I decided to stop in Castro Valley to do some photographs at Cull Canyon Park, and grab a quick bite at the College Avenue Burrito Shop. About half way down Castro Valley Boulevard, I saw this cool lady on a corner, waiting to cross the street. She was a lady of style and sense, who made me smile. I have no idea who she was, or what she found so interesting on her phone, for all I know she was taking my photo, but to see someone like her taking Covid-19 this seriously, with such style, humor and flair, made me feel better for a little while. I have rarely seen folks without their masks in the East Bay, but no fully masked human could beat the impact of this woman's statement of just how easy, and fun, masking up could be. Hey, it looks like Captain Trumps might be around for a while, one doctor recently said we will probably be wearing masks a year from now, so perhaps I need to think outside the deadly virus accessory box. Although, nothing says "out of the box" quiet like wearing a baby bonnet on your face, while shopping at Walmart! Shrug. I'd do it again! LOL!

 

~Carly

Stockton, California

December 16th 2020

The Wind Takes Everything

 

"In the end, the wind takes everything, doesn't it? And why not? Why other? If the sweetness of our lives did not depart, there would be no sweetness at all."

 

~Stephen King

The Wind Through The Keyhole

 

So much good happened yesterday. An uneventful Electoral College count, with the exception of a rude man attempting to intimidate Stephen King regarding the win of Joe Biden. The rollout of the first Covid-19 vaccine injections and the supply shipment, and at the end of the day, the resignation of Attorney General Bill Barr. Democracy won, and it is the beginning of the end of the monster that has haunted us for the better part of a year. A monster so terrifying, it makes Donald Trump seem like an old and dear friend that you would, and could, trust your last dime to. The monster of Covid-19. As good as yesterday was, along with the sweet came the bitter... we crossed over 300,000 dead in America. Much of it driven by lies, misinformation, and folks unable to give up the urge to gather, despite the Grim Reaper walking past us.

 

According to the Los Angeles Times, the county I live in, San Joaquin, continues to suffer under some of the worst statistics in this state, if not the country, as we have reached zero ICU beds available as of this past weekend, and perhaps as low as minus 30% ICU bed availability by this coming weekend, which is the weekend before Christmas. Sad times. I feel it when I hear about it, or do any research into it, but it's cold outside now, the wind is blowing cold ominous winds across the farm country, and storms are building, which makes it all worse. It's natural for days to grow dark, it's expected this time of year, but this is different, and I don't even have the laughter of leaves to console me. They have fallen, and they, for perhaps the first time since I began my autumn leaf project, are  reminding me of the seasons of my life, and what it means to die. Will I see another autumn on this earth? Or am I an autumn leaf of 2020? Am I the last leaf of the year, unaware that the next cold breath of the wind, will serve as my natural enemy when death comes claiming?

 

 

~Carly

Stockton, California

December 15th 2020

Seasons And Transitions

 "Speaking of happiness, those distinctive moments are found outdoors... in the autumn and winter and always in the mountains where people are few, wildlife is abundant and there is peace in the quiet."

~Donna Lynn Hope

Autumn is not giving up it's gold and russet without a fight, but I have a feeling, winter isn't going to give autumn one bit of extra time as far as the temperatures go! We have had some really warm and dry winters, but we have already gotten a sizable amount of snow this year in the Sierra. 18 inches in the last couple days at Donner Summit alone! It's okay. I enjoy it when the seasons duke it out during the transition, and no two seasons do it as beautifully as Autumn and Winter. I am a happy girl!

~Carly

Stockton, California

December 14th 2020

This Autumn's Last Gift

 

"I stood in a clearing among a stand of beech trees, leaves as red as rubies, branches black as jet. It was sunset, and shafts of richly colored sunlight struck through the delicate pillars of the tree trunks, as if though the lancet windows of a cathedral."

 

~Kate Forsyth

Bitter Greens

 

In my sadness, I thought that I would probably never see a sunset again, as beautiful as a sunset from way atop Grizzly Peak in Berkeley, or from an unobstructed view of my beautiful Pacific, from Ocean Beach, in San Francisco, but last night the sky burned with every bit as colorful beauty as I have ever seen in those other two places. And it doesn't hurt my heart to say... I am home now. I have found a new creative love in enjoying the birds at the protected areas along the San Joaquin Delta, and my camera has found purpose. And I even have my beloved Mount Diablo to remind me, San Francisco, and all the places that live in heart, aren't so far away, and are just right on the other side of the mountain waiting for me. If I can see Mount Diablo... I am okay. I am Okay. Better yet... I am in love. Autumn 2020 had one last gift for me. My heart is healed.

 

Woodbridge Ecological Reserve

Lodi, California

December 12th, 2020

~Carly

December 12th 2020

Stockton, California