Happy Easter 2024

 

Easter is…
Joining in a birdsong,
Eying an early sunrise,
Smelling yellow daffodils,
Unbolting windows and doors,
Skipping through meadows,
Cuddling newborns,
Hoping, believing,
Reviving spent life,
Inhaling fresh air,
Sprinkling seeds along furrows,
Tracking in the mud.
Easter is the soul’s first taste of spring.

~Richelle E. Goodrich

 

  Making Wishes: Quotes, Thoughts, & a Little Poetry for Every Day of the Year

 

I am a person of faith, and I don't speak about it much here because my faith is too personal to expose it to the ugliness of social media, but all the blessings you see listed above, and more, is because of God, and his son Jesus Christ. If you aren't a person of faith, I stand by you, I will not try to change you or your values in any way, you have my respect in your values, but on this one day, allow me to share the part of me that I keep to myself. My faith. Believe me, I have felt God's love and empathy in this past year, as I have navigated the death of my sister, niece and nephew. It helped me get back up from my depression and I am beginning to move on. I think about them every day, but the lingering sadness isn't lingering as much anymore. I hate this last part of letting go, because then they will really be gone, but there is a strength in all this, and it has come through really hard work, and God being there every step of the way!

 

 And by the way, Joe Biden is right...

“There will come a day, I promise you, when the thought of your son, or daughter, or your wife or your husband, brings a smile to your lips before it brings a tear to your eye. It will happen. My prayer for you is that day will come sooner than later.”

~Joe Biden

 

Happy Easter to you and your family.

I hope your day is filled with love, warmth,

 and every blessing and kindness too.

 Never forget the strength of kindness.

Don't forget to be kind to yourself.

 

How I Spent My Last Day Of Autumn 2023 (Part Two)

 

Life is like a train ride.

The passengers on the train are seemingly going to the same destination as you, but based on their belief in you or their belief that the train will get them to their desired destination they will stay on the ride or they will get off somewhere during the trip.

People can and will get off at any stop.

Just know that where people get off is more of an reflection on them, than it is on you.

There will be a few people in your life that will make the whole trip with you, who believe in you, accept that you are human and that mistakes will be made along the way, and that you will get to your desired destination - together, no matter what.

Be very grateful of these people.

They are rare and when you find one, don't let go of them - ever.

Be blessed for the ones who get on at the worst stops when no one is there.

Remember those people, they are special.

Always hold them dear to your heart.

Be very wary of people sneaking on at certain stops when things are going good and acting like they have been there for the whole ride.

For they will be the first to depart.

There will be ones who secretly try to get off the ride and there will be those that very publicly will jump off.

Don't pay any heed to the defectors.

Pay heed to the passengers that are still on the trip.

They are the important ones.

If someone tries to get back on the train - don't be angry or hold a grudge, let them.

Just see where they are around the next hard turn.

If they are buckled in - accept them.

If they are pulling the hand rail alarm again - then let them off the train freely and waste no space in your head for them again, ever.

There will be times that the train will be moving slow, at almost a crawls pace.

Appreciate that you can take in the view.

There will be times where the train is going so fast that everything is a blur.

Enjoy the sense of speed in your life, as it is exhilarating but unsustainable.

There will also be the chance that the train derails.

If that does happen, it will hurt, a lot, for a long time.

But there will be people who will appear out of no where who will get you back on track.

Those will be the people that will matter most in your life.

Love them forever.

For you can never repay these people.

The thing is, that even if you could repay them, they wouldn't accept it anyway.

Just pay it forward.

Eventually your train will get to its final stop and you will need to deboard.

At that time you will realize that life is about the journey AND the destination.

Know and have faith that at the end of your ride your train will have the right passengers on board and all the passengers that were on board at one time or another were there for a distinct purpose.

Enjoy the ride.

~John A Passaro

Life Is Like A Train Ride

 

Trains. Birds. The remainder of the Autumn Leaves. I suppose I spent the last day of Autumn 2023 the way I began Autumn this year, only a bit less maudlin perhaps. Autumn is now, and always will be, the great healer. It has always healed my heart, like no other time of year and this year was no exception. So, there isn't much to say about it, it' just helped me find my footing again, and I am forever grateful. Now, on to the rest of the holiday's!

 

 

Those Summer Nights

 

"For to be free is not to merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in  way that respects and enhances the freedom of others."

 

~Nelson Mandela

 

Pretty, isn't it? This is the last fireworks photo I will have from our time in this house. We are moving soon. This dream is coming to an end. But was it a dream or a nightmare? I am still trying to figure it out. Oh well, I will share more later. For now lets just enjoy the beautiful photo of the light, and the freedoms, we all share. Its all a great big adventure... isn't it?

 

 ~Me

Finally Feeling Spring

"When spring came, even the false spring, there were no problems except where to be happiest. The only thing that could spoil a day was people and if you could keep from making engagements, each day had no limits. People were always the limiters of happiness except for the very few that were as good as spring itself."

 ~Ernest Hemingway

A Moveable Feast

The battle is officially over! We are satisfied with the result. It will be enough to move on, and pay some bills off, and get settled into a new place. There are still some details to be ironed out, minor things like the date we will receive the check, and there will probably be a nondisclosure on names, dates, and amount of the settlement, but that's just the usual behind the scenes workings, no additional drama will take place. So, all that's left to do now is to finish the packing, and finding a new place to call home. Fortunately, we have found a really nice, and very helpful real estate professional to guide us through the next steps in this big adventure. So with the biggest part of this behind us now, I have been reassessing how I feel about things.

Q1. With the settlement check on it's way, am I still angry?

A1. You bet I am! I have forgiven the situation, but in truth, that is more for me than for them. Forgiving means you can move on with your life. It means you can heal. But will I forget? NOT LIKELY.

Q2. Will I still be grieving the loss of the cottage a year from now?

A2. A part of me will always miss this cottage. It was our home for 14 years. There was a lot of joy, and happiness that took place here, as well as a lot of pain from grieving the loss of Elvis, Alan's brother Daryl and June, my dear friend, as well as missing friends who had to move on for one reason or another. I still think of the last conversation I had with Mr. November. I was sitting at my desk, and it was goodbye. But that memory is just that, a memory. And I can keep it with me always, wherever I go. This cottage has been the place I can shut my eyes, and feel what I need to feel as I move through life. But when we find the new place, I know I will come to think just as fondly about it, and feel just as comfortable, as I have here. And I will love it for it's own merits. 

Alan and I are an unbeatable team. When someone put our family in jeopardy, we hugged each other and went into battle. Like a few times before, we thrived in a dark time. Trust in marriage really is the key to everything. Supporting each other daily, so the other one knows, even with just a hug, that no matter what... we are each other's priority... that is what makes our marriage work! It's a strange feeling to know that ours will be the last love story the cottage will have in it. And sometime in the next few months it will be torn to the ground, but I am hoping the rose garden I planted will somehow tell whoever ends up purchasing the property that love existed here. A deep, trusting, funny, silly, surreal, kind, steady, romantic love. And there was much more joy here than there ever was sorrow.

Mood: HAPPY

~Me :)

No Shirts. No Shoes. No Whining.

"Never tell your problems to anyone... 

20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them."

~Lou Holtz

Friday was a good day. If you kept me in your thoughts yesterday... thank you. I got your good vibrations. Friday came with some light at the end of the tunnel. We will find out next week for sure but next week, fingers crossed, this case may be settled, and it will be onto the future from there. At least for this weekend, no whining, no crying, no anger, just packing up my things, and moving forward on.

Mood: I'm Good!

~Me :)

It Was A Walk In The Park...

"A lone walker is both present and detached, more than an audience but less than a participant. Walking assuages or legitimizes this alienation."

~ Rebecca Solnit, Wanderlust: A History Of Walking

Is it really only Thursday? It's been a very long week so far, oh it was the usual number of days, but it has had a god-awful... I don't know... darkness to it. There is nothing more depressing than a beautiful summer day that carries the weight of grief as a companion. Yes, I took Robin William's death hard, I am, in truth, devastated. I have some very personal reasons for that, and as such I will probably never share why, but believe me the grief I feel right now is deep, but I will be okay because I know, this to shall pass! Cold? Perhaps! True nonetheless. The loss itself, however, will haunt everyone who loved him forever. That's what suicide does.

Forgive me, I had no intention of getting this into things. I guess I am just sharing about how dark I feel at the moment. It's the same darkness I felt a few months back when our friend "J" took his own life, in the middle of a cool, dark, mid-spring night. No sign was shown by him that day, it was business as usual, and yet within a few short hours he was gone. Just gone. And the rest of us were left with little information about why he made that decision. I have come to the conclusion that truth is... it was none of our business! So, when that fact finally sinks in, it both simultaneously heals you, and drives a stake through your heart. 

Nice!

Thanks friend!

What choice do I have now? The same I had a few months ago. None. So yesterday, I decided to take Alan's advice, and grab a cold drink at Starbucks, and head out with the camera! Alan reminded me that when I grieve, I tend to see things I photograph differently. My perspective is, or seems to be, finer tuned. He reminded me that I took some of my best photographs after the death of my friend Pam, and again after the death of my Elvis. I don't know if I took any photos yesterday that would qualify as "some of my best" but I made the effort. And what did I find through the tainted eyes of grief? Autumn is beginning to kick summer out on it's treacherous ass! 

 "But then fall comes, kicking summer out on it's treacherous ass as it does one day sometime after the midpoint of September, it stays awhile like an old friend that you have missed. It settles in the way an old friend will settle into your favorite chair and take out his pipe and light it and fill the afternoon with stories of places he has been and things he had done since last he saw you."

~Stephen King

I am glad I made the effort. At first it didn't sound like a good idea. I was tired, and really just wanted to nap, but moving forward has to start somewhere, right? Starting at the end of summer seems fitting somehow. The old wound for my friend, and the new one for Robin Williams are two separate spaces that need time, space, and in the end, letting go of. 

"The scariest moment is always just before you start."

~Stephen King

Mood: Quiet But Okay

~Me

Serendipity

"It's hard to believe in coincidence, but its's even harder to believe in anything else."

~John Green, Will Grayson, Will Grayson

It's really cold tonight, so cold in fact that the local weather forecasters are predicting snow as low as 1,000 ft, which pretty much means, that Mt. Diablo, Mt. Hamilton and the Santa Cruz summit will definitely be getting a dusting of snow... and so will Grizzly Peak Blvd here in the Berkeley Hills. That probably won't be until Friday, but our little house guest, Foster, who I told you about in yesterday's post, had to come in tonight. I am not sure Dylan and Hendrix are ready to have company over, especially someone so wee, but ready or not, we are all going to have to make it work! 

Sometimes people come into our lives quite unexpectedly. Sometimes people leave our lives quite unexpectedly. We don't have much choice in these matters. All we can do is... our best! When I think about all the human friends I have lost, for one reason or another, I get so sad. I remember the day I drew a personal line in the sand and said... ENOUGH. When Mr. November, ran screaming from my life, I decided I would never put myself in that position ever again. NEVER. And then one day, you find yourself making a friend, and you forget why you decided to shut yourself off so completely? It's funny how some of the best things in life, are so rarely convenient. I still love Mr. November, but I don't think about him much anymore. A fact that occurred to me just the other day, when I was thinking about the fact that I rarely think about him anymore. LOL!

"Of course, that's how life is. A turn of events may seem very small at the time it's happening, but you never really know, do you? How can you."

~Tom Xavier, Dark Curses and Faerie Dreams

Although I do smile when I remember how he used to make me laugh! And how everything was okay when we were around each other, and in the last little bit of time he was around, before he moved away, we were... well... understanding each other a lot better. I know, what I am saying doesn't make much sense, but it does to me. It's all good. But I really don't think of it much anymore, time passes, and feelings fade, and light replaces sad feelings.

Right now I have a feline house guest who needs me. His name is Foster, and he is already my friend. He was put on the same path Alan and I are on, and maybe he will stay with us forever, or maybe one day he will move on to a new family, and it's what's meant to be. Life is sometimes not convenient. Sometimes it hurts like HELL. Sometimes it's the work we have to put into things, that pays off the most. Time moves us along to each new adventure, whether we want to go or not, but moving forward with an open heart, makes any adventure more exciting!

Serendipity: noun; the faculty or phenomenon of finding valuable things not sought for; also: an instance of this.

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

Have You Seen Today?

(Asiana Flight 214 with 3 Denbeste Water Solutions Tanks In The Forefront)

"No matter how many plans you make or how much in control you are, life is always winging it."

~Carroll Bryant

Alan and I went back to BayFront Park, in Milbrea yesterday, to take one last look at the wreckage, still sitting on the runway of Asiana Flight 214. On my first trip, last Saturday afternoon, just hours after the crash took place, I could barely make out the tail portion of the aircraft that had come to rest on the back of the runway. It was late afternoon, and the lighting was very bright, but today I could get a better look at it. It is still a surreal sight to see the tail so far behind where the plane eventually came to rest!

I feel so sorry that all those people had to go through that horrific event. My heart goes out to the flight attendants. Those brave young women preformed miraculously under the depth of pressure that most of us will never, if we are very lucky, experience. Honestly, I am not so much how I would be under those circumstances, but I will never forget how much better the whole situation turned out due to their diligence and response under extreme pressure!

They are absolutely the truest, most elegant examples of heroism!

Here are my photographs from today...

 
(The Tail Section From Asiana Flight 214 Still Resting On Runway 28L)


(A United Airlines Flight Taxiing Past The Wreckage Of Flight 214)


(The Surreal Sight Of Two Planes So Near Flight 214)




The San Mateo Bridge As Seen From BayFront Park, Milbrea Ca.

Yesterday was my last chance to visit BayFront park, and document for myself the events of last Saturday. Late last night the NTSB allowed airport maintenance to begin removing debris and begin repairing the runway so it can reopen as soon as possible. It's a good thing. It's time to move forward I suppose. It will certainly be much more difficult for some than others. I will always remember this event, and my heart will always sink a little as I drive past the airport. It's simply not something that is easily filed away in my conscience. You know what I mean?

It didn't happen to me. I didn't know anyone in the crash. But in a way it drove home to me just how fragile everything is. I keep thinking about what a gorgeous day last Saturday was. It was one of those days like 9/11 when before I answered Alan's call, telling me the dreadful news, I had a moment to admire the late summer, nearly autumn sunshine, and cool gentle breeze moving my curtains so very gently. When I heard his voice say, "Carly... are you okay?" it made me laugh, because the first thing I thought of was, how could I possibly be otherwise? Have you seen today?

It's going to be a while, maybe years, before we learn what the cause, or causes of the crash of flight 214. I am trying to not make up my mind early, because you just never know what may have gone wrong. I think instead I am going to follow along as information is made available, thank GOD a little more for those I love, and thank GOD once again that there are special people like those flight attendants who keep their wits about them in the face of tragety! We are all better off because of them!

"Courage Is Not The Absence Of Fear, But Rather The Judgement That Something Else Is More Important Than Fear."

~Meg Cabot

Mood: Quiet

~Me :)

Be Right Back...

"I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you head is not what I meant."

-Robert McClosky

The quote for this post describes, quite accurately, how the communication between Alan and I sometimes goes. Especially as we are smack dab in the middle of the move! So, as I mentioned last week, we will be skipping the Monday Photo Shoot for this week. The new Internet connection at my new place is scheduled for Friday, the 25th, so, with fingers crossed, we will be resuming on Monday, February 28th. I have scheduled assignment #113 to publish on the 28th, and, in fact, each additional EMPS assignment for several weeks after that. I am sure all will go well with the installation, but in case there is a snag, just play amongst yourselves, and I will be back soon!

Participation List for EMPS #112: Love 02/14/11

Ruth

Freda

Greg

Jama

Karen

Vicki


The photo you see above was taken at the Berkeley Marina. It was at the end of a very hot summer day. The cool breeze off the bay can be a little piece of heaven on summer days. The bridge you see in the background is the Golden Gate Bridge. It's scenes like this I will miss the most. I am only moving about 20 minutes away, and Hayward has a shoreline to, but instead of photographing the Bay Bridge, and the Golden Gate, I will have to get used to photographing the San Mateo/Hayward bridge instead. :) New horizons! New photo opportunities!
See you on Monday, February 28th, with an all new assignment!


-Carly ;)

Don't forget, the Round Robin Photo Challenges and the Weekend Assignment is always looking for new participants! If you haven't played before, why don't you give it a whirl! Karen would love to have you join in!

Weekend Assignment (Karen posts a new assignment each week!)

Round Robin Photo Challenges (A new challenge posted twice a month)

Moving On To Summer

"Then followed that beautiful season, summer. Filled was the air with a dreamy and magical light; and the landscape lay as if new created in all the freshness of childhood."

-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow




I am ready to move on to a new season, and I think this is going to be a good summer. Alan and I have been really busy the last few days, getting the garden prepared for planting. He does the vegetables, fruits and gourds, and I tend to the flowers and herbs. It has been a couple years since I have felt like taking care of a garden, so it will take a little bit of work to get everything prepared, but I found some amazing miniature roses at Home Depot the other day, and they are all set and ready to go. :) I also bought some Cosmos seed and some multi-colored Four O' Clocks. I am hoping to encourage some butterflies to pay me a visit this autumn. I haven't had many in the yard the last few years. Since I have been too tired this year to do much traveling with the camera, I hoping the garden will bring me some good opportunities. :)

We also got some bird seed for the feeder, to encourage our Wrens, California song birds, and Robins to come by for a visit. A garden filled with happy sounds in summer is a good thing, in fact, it should be just what the doctor ordered. :) We have set up the canopy, so I will have some shade in the middle of the day. I like to go outside with the sketch book, if it isn't too hot. The last couple days have been really warm, but we will be cooling off by the weekend, time to play with Elvis outdoors I think. I am thinking about hanging some colored lights from the canopy, to create a nice mood. We'll see. I love setting a nice table, especially when Alan cooks. He is amazing with the BBQ, I am so lucky to have found a guy who likes to cook as much as I do. I can't wait for the vegetables later this summer, a nice veggie kabob, with either his favorite Raspberry Chipotle sauce or a Balsamic Vinegrette, is a nice low maintenance dinner on a hot summer evening. Summer begins in just 7 days... yikes... I better get busy! :) More pictures to come as the garden progresses.

-OndineMonet
"A New Mini Rose"
Berkeley, California
June 12, 2007
Early Evening