Saturday, April 18, 2015

Finally Feeling Spring

"When spring came, even the false spring, there were no problems except where to be happiest. The only thing that could spoil a day was people and if you could keep from making engagements, each day had no limits. People were always the limiters of happiness except for the very few that were as good as spring itself."
 ~Ernest Hemingway

A Moveable Feast

The battle is officially over! We are satisfied with the result. It will be enough to move on, and pay some bills off, and get settled into a new place. There are still some details to be ironed out, minor things like the date we will receive the check, and there will probably be a nondisclosure on names, dates, and amount of the settlement, but that's just the usual behind the scenes workings, no additional drama will take place. So, all that's left to do now is to finish the packing, and finding a new place to call home. Fortunately, we have found a really nice, and very helpful real estate professional to guide us through the next steps in this big adventure. So with the biggest part of this behind us now, I have been reassessing how I feel about things.

Q1. With the settlement check on it's way, am I still angry?

A1. You bet I am! I have forgiven the situation, but in truth, that is more for me than for them. Forgiving means you can move on with your life. It means you can heal. But will I forget? NOT LIKELY.

Q2. Will I still be grieving the loss of the cottage a year from now?

A2. A part of me will always miss this cottage. It was our home for 14 years. There was a lot of joy, and happiness that took place here, as well as a lot of pain from grieving the loss of Elvis, Alan's brother Daryl and June, my dear friend, as well as missing friends who had to move on for one reason or another. I still think of the last conversation I had with Mr. November. I was sitting at my desk, and it was goodbye. But that memory is just that, a memory. And I can keep it with me always, wherever I go. This cottage has been the place I can shut my eyes, and feel what I need to feel as I move through life. But when we find the new place, I know I will come to think just as fondly about it, and feel just as comfortable, as I have here. And I will love it for it's own merits. 

Alan and I are an unbeatable team. When someone put our family in jeopardy, we hugged each other and went into battle. Like a few times before, we thrived in a dark time. Trust in marriage really is the key to everything. Supporting each other daily, so the other one knows, even with just a hug, that no matter what... we are each other's priority... that is what makes our marriage work! It's a strange feeling to know that ours will be the last love story the cottage will have in it. And sometime in the next few months it will be torn to the ground, but I am hoping the rose garden I planted will somehow tell whoever ends up purchasing the property that love existed here. A deep, trusting, funny, silly, surreal, kind, steady, romantic love. And there was much more joy here than there ever was sorrow.


~Me :)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Carly - I was doing a fly by to check in and stumbled onto this awful situation that landed on you. I scrolled allllll the way back to the day you learned that your home was not a legal rental. I can't imagine what you have been through...and I can. I've had to leave two homes in the last 10 years and it's been so hard. The first nearly crushed me...we'd been there 13 years. But I'm here to tell you, you'll be ok. And after reading this particular entry....I have complete confidence in that statement. You , Alan and the kitties ARE home wherever you are together. Hang in there sweetheart... you'll get through the stuff that must be done. And as sad and difficult as this is, my heart tells me there is goodness waiting for you. Now...I'll read on.