Autumn Leaf Of The Day #1

 

“Aprils have never meant much to me, 

autumns seem that season of beginning, spring.” 

~Truman Capote

  Breakfast at Tiffany’s and Three Stories

 

Can you believe it? We have finally arrived at the first day of autumn! A welcome old friend. I photographed this leaf in Castro Valley yesterday, after I dropped off some unused food and a test kit Dylan never got to use. Oh my. Autumn will have a much different feel to it this year, but as I have always said, and believe even now, autumn heals me like nothing else, and I am grateful for that! Hopefully it will fill my heart with every beautiful thing, and I will see beyond this overwhelming sense of loss. Sorry to be so maudlin, I won't be like this every day, I promise, but autumn is the season of letting go after a life well lived, isn't it? And all things in their time.

Autumn Begins

Sunday, September 22nd, 2024

5:43 a.m. PDT

 

Goodbye Super Kitty

 

"There will come a day, I promise you,when the thought of your son or daughter, wife or husband brings a smile to your lips before it brings tears to your eye. It will happen. My prayer for you is that day comes sooner than later."

 

~Joe Biden

 

I said goodbye to Dylan yesterday. He died peacefully and we loved and loved each other deeply, as we made eye contact with each other, as he began to slip away. I always knew he would need me at the end, just as he needed me when we made eye contact when I first met him. We always needed each other. And we were there for each other throughout the years. He made me laugh, oh my god how he could piss me off, but he was also a lot of fun to snuggle with, and we shared biscuits with butter. He loved butter. He had a full personality, sometimes he was Dillybean, other times he was Mr. Pissypants!He was complicated, but we found our way. Eventually, in 2020, he began to have health problems, and the end came when he was 16 years old. That's 81 in cat years. He lived a long safe life with us, and his brothers, Hendrix and Joey. There is never a good time to say goodbye, and I will miss him forever. But he lives deep in my heart, and one day we will see each other again, and we will play our favorite game, Super Kitty. 

 

Super kittttty. He flies to the east, and he flies to the west.

 

Heee's Supppper Kitty

 

Goodnight my baby.

 

 

 

Autumn Begins... 3:20 PM EDT

 

"But when fall comes, kicking summer out on its treacherous ass as it always does one day sometime after the midpoint of September, it stays awhile like an old friend that you have missed. It settles in the way an old friend will settle into your favorite chair and take out his pipe and light it and then fill the afternoon with stories of places he has been and things he has done since last he saw you."

 

~Stephen King

Salem's Lot

 

The last photograph of summer in the San Joaquin Valley  

 

The Autumn Equinox is here. Finally. Autumn... the great healer of all the fire, pain, exhaustion, and of course, treacherousness of summer. I know I say it every single year, but the summer of 2021 was a season I tried very hard to not turn my back on. If ever a summer smile on it's face and a knife in it's hand, it was this one. We are selling our home, which means it has been emotionally exhausting, but we are nearing the end of that journey, closing is only a matter of days away, and autumn will heal us. It always does. It did in 2015, after the cruelest summer in decades brought us to Stockton, by way of the desolateness of the towns of Patterson and Turlock. The summer of 2015 tried very hard to break us, fortunately, it was also incompetent, because we are still standing.

 

 Last year, autumn relieved the world of Donald John Trump's presidency. Some healing definitely happened, but then a bitter winter came, and with it, the pain of an insurrection. But in the end, autumn and winter joined hands one last time the day of Joe Biden's inauguration. It meant a lot to me to see not just Biden be sworn in, but also that of the first female vice president of the United States, Kamala Harris. This year, all I ask of autumn is to be gentle with me. Help me find my way. I will be saying more about it later, but all I want for the first week of my favorite season is to enjoy our last week, or so, in our house. To love as much as Alan and I can. Love the kids. Love the movies we watch. Love the meals we share. Love. Autumn is here, and it has indeed kicked summer out on it's treacherous ass! 

 

And now, the first autumn leaf of 2021!

 

Sacramento, California

Nikon

 

A Time For Letting Go...

"Autumn is the time of year when Mother Nature says, "Look how easy, how healthy, and how beautiful letting go can be."

~Toni Sorenson

Time to let go of autumn. Okay, I know that I still have five days, but I have so many beautiful leaves left over, that it breaks my heart to not let them have their day in the sun. So, here are some of my favorites, and as I deal with all the old feelings of how I have grieved, let go, and looked for the road back to peace of mind, which really only lives in autumn, at least for me it does, I will miss autumn, but I will be okay...again.

And Now...

#86 Leaf Of The Day

December 16th 2018

Photographed December 15th 2018

Stockton, California

Samsung

~Mood: Quiet

~Me

Finally Feeling Spring

"When spring came, even the false spring, there were no problems except where to be happiest. The only thing that could spoil a day was people and if you could keep from making engagements, each day had no limits. People were always the limiters of happiness except for the very few that were as good as spring itself."

 ~Ernest Hemingway

A Moveable Feast

The battle is officially over! We are satisfied with the result. It will be enough to move on, and pay some bills off, and get settled into a new place. There are still some details to be ironed out, minor things like the date we will receive the check, and there will probably be a nondisclosure on names, dates, and amount of the settlement, but that's just the usual behind the scenes workings, no additional drama will take place. So, all that's left to do now is to finish the packing, and finding a new place to call home. Fortunately, we have found a really nice, and very helpful real estate professional to guide us through the next steps in this big adventure. So with the biggest part of this behind us now, I have been reassessing how I feel about things.

Q1. With the settlement check on it's way, am I still angry?

A1. You bet I am! I have forgiven the situation, but in truth, that is more for me than for them. Forgiving means you can move on with your life. It means you can heal. But will I forget? NOT LIKELY.

Q2. Will I still be grieving the loss of the cottage a year from now?

A2. A part of me will always miss this cottage. It was our home for 14 years. There was a lot of joy, and happiness that took place here, as well as a lot of pain from grieving the loss of Elvis, Alan's brother Daryl and June, my dear friend, as well as missing friends who had to move on for one reason or another. I still think of the last conversation I had with Mr. November. I was sitting at my desk, and it was goodbye. But that memory is just that, a memory. And I can keep it with me always, wherever I go. This cottage has been the place I can shut my eyes, and feel what I need to feel as I move through life. But when we find the new place, I know I will come to think just as fondly about it, and feel just as comfortable, as I have here. And I will love it for it's own merits. 

Alan and I are an unbeatable team. When someone put our family in jeopardy, we hugged each other and went into battle. Like a few times before, we thrived in a dark time. Trust in marriage really is the key to everything. Supporting each other daily, so the other one knows, even with just a hug, that no matter what... we are each other's priority... that is what makes our marriage work! It's a strange feeling to know that ours will be the last love story the cottage will have in it. And sometime in the next few months it will be torn to the ground, but I am hoping the rose garden I planted will somehow tell whoever ends up purchasing the property that love existed here. A deep, trusting, funny, silly, surreal, kind, steady, romantic love. And there was much more joy here than there ever was sorrow.

Mood: HAPPY

~Me :)

My Happy Place

"You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway."

~Steve Maraboli, Life, The Truth, And Being Free

Okay, I have been a little stressed lately. I could give the laundry list, but why? No good comes from ruminating, and besides, why burden you, and possibly stress you out, about what I stress about! So, what am I going to do about all the stress? Glad you asked! I am going to spend a lot of time at one of my favorite places on Earth. Point Montara Lighthouse, in Montara, California.

Lighthouses have been my passion for years! I have been to many of them up and down the California coast, and have been intrigued and inspired by all of them, but there is something about Point Montara Lighthouse that I love, and let me tell you, it's true love! I love it's size, and it's history. I love that there are benches overlooking the water where you can sit for as long as you want, and just let go of whatever stress or pain that is in your way. I love that I can go there when nothing is wrong, and leave even happier than when I got there!

It's always there for me. It doesn't judge. It just shines it's light on me. 

See...





And look how beautiful the sun is, as it begins to set, on a January day.



Who wouldn't want to spend the day there? Perhaps one day I will stay at the hostel on the grounds for a couple days, or maybe forever. You never know. Shrug.

Point Montara Lighthouse Hostel

Mood: Quiet But Okay

~Me :)

Round Robin Challenge: Rear View

"The past is never where you think you left it."

~Chuck Palahniuk

RRC: The Rear View

Time for a new Round Robin Photo Challenge, and this time the subject is one I suggested to Karen recently, The Rear View. The idea is simple, take a picture of something behind you. I suggested this subject because with the new year freshly upon us, I find myself leaving a lot of old thoughts and actions behind me. I am feeling much more positive this year, as I have learned to let go of the things bothering me the most. Anyway, enough of that, on with the photography...

A Tree Behind Me...


The Rear View Of Some Well Dressed Mannequins...


Empty Seats Behind Me At The Theater...


And Now For Something A Littler More Literal...

(The Rear View Image Of A Late Autumn Tree, Out Of My Beloved Old Car 2005)

The Rear View Of A Pair Of Teddy Bear Pals...


The first photo was taken a couple weeks ago, in Pleasanton, California. It looks more like a side photo, and it kinda was, but in order to get that angle I had to contort in a very uncomfortable position in order to capture any of the reflection in that beautiful window. So, I think it counts. Hopefully. 

Now that you have seen my contribution, be sure to pay a visit to all the Robins participating in this round. Simply click the link at the top of the page to be redirected to the official Round Robin Photo Blog. There you will find the participation link, and all the information you need to join in the challenge!

Mood: Happy

~Me :)