Retail Therapy Pt 2

"Would women find vampires even sexier and more romantic if instead of fangs they had rose thorns? It's thoughts like these I think of when digging in my garden, looking for my one true love... (If only I could remember where I buried her!)."

~Jarod Kintz

At Even One Penny, This Book Would Be Overpriced.
In fact, Free Is Too Expensive, Because You'd Still Waste Time By Reading It.

I have been busy this week, mostly sitting in one place, hoping my joints and nerve endings would just stop hurting me. My Fibromyalgia is really being really nasty. But what can I do? I meditate. I sleep when my body tells me to. I try to keep my own spirits up, and I try to get the vitamins and nutrition I need. After that... it's all up to the Fibromyalgia to figure out when it will be done with pain. Sigh. At least my mood is good, and so is my willingness to try. I even went out yesterday, and the day before, on short shopping trips. The retail therapy has been a big help, and Alan and I finally went out to dinner to celebrate his birthday, which was overdue by some 12 days or so. He is a wonderful man to wait until I felt more like going out! I treated myself to a new wallet, which I posted about yesterday, and I also used my Old Navy Visa rewards to pick up two new coats, a green wool coat, and a black faux leather vegan moto jacket. I also found a cute pink bathrobe, and some t-shirts and tanks. And the best part? Between the mark downs, the closeouts, and the rewards, I got all of it for around $9! How completely cool is that? Am I a smart shopper or what?

Happiness Is A Successful Shopping Trip!

 Bigger Happiness Is When The Pain Stops!

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

Rose 

Photographed May 22nd 2005

12:30 PM

Konica Minolta

Graphic Created January 22nd 2015

Watercolor

Retail Therapy Part 1

"I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel?

 And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson."

~Emo Philips

I have engaged in a little bit of retail therapy lately. Over the weekend the snap on my wallet broke, so I purchased a new one. I think it's kinda cute! I don't tend to spend a lot on wallets, because a wallet will usually last me a five years or more. I would rather spend more on a purse, and get a less expensive wallet. I love this new one, it's a bit smaller than the last one, which means it will fit better in some of my smaller purses. Always a plus! Come back tomorrow to see part two of my January shopping extravaganza! There is nothing like a little retail therapy for what ails ya!

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

The Salad Has Nothing To Do With The Words

"Think of your head as an unsafe neighborhood;

 don't go there alone."

~Augusten Burroughs

Dry

This Friday I will meet, and have an appointment with, my new therapist. She will be number 51. Yep, in my lifetime I have had 50 therapists! I am 52, so you can imagine who young I began my adventures with the couch! And keep in mind, I went a few years, here and there, without any time spent in therapy. Sigh. I don't really need it now, I just know that sometimes painful things comeback sometimes, and I feel like it is better to have someone I can touch base with. Does that make sense?

Anyway, I have learned and gotten a lot out of therapy over the years. I have learned to let go, I have learned to not ruminate on the painful times, and I completely eliminated panic attacks from my life! So it's a good thing to be establishing myself with a new therapist, it's just telling the whole story from the beginning that's the hardest part. Fortunately, I am in a happy place, so in a way, whatever got me to here is something to be grateful for.

Now this picture has everything to do with the words.

Mood: Quiet

~Me :)

Dating Mr. Squishy

(Mr. Squishy)

"The only person who can save you, is you.

 That was going to be the the thing that

 informed the rest of my life."

~Sheryl Crow

On being diagnosed with breast cancer.

Well, it's that time again. How did 2 years go by so quickly? I know I need to go, but it's not something I am looking forward to very much. You see, I have a lump. Now, before you panic, I am prone to these things. I have lumpy breasts, especially around certain times of the month, which even at my advanced age I am still enjoying! LOL. I will feel a lump from time to time, and then it will disappear. From what the doctor tells me it's not unheard of, and no one makes a panic because my mammograms always come out just fine. It's been like a toothache. You notice a pain, you make an appointment, and by the time you reach the chair, the pain is gone, and the cavity is gone with it! Let the patient heal thyself! But this time, while doing my usual monthly self exam, which I do bi-monthly now because, hello, not getting any younger, I noticed that one of those little lumpy bumps hadn't left! So, okay, maybe it has a will of it's own, or maybe it's lazy... who knows? But the bottom line is, I have an amazing healthcare plan, so why not go get my annual check and get the good news! Right? I don't take my healthcare for granted, there are a lot of ladies who wish they had a way to get a mammogram, but can't.

I could go on quite the political rant here, but I won't for now. Now isn't the time, but stay tuned, I will be revisiting the subject! Now, if you are reading this post, and haven't had your routine mammogram, will you consider joining me? You don't have to come to my appointment, of course, but will you please schedule yourself an appointment, sometime in the next 6 weeks or so, and then come back here and tell me how it went in the comment thread? Or you can send me an email if you like. And DM on Twitter is good also! The main thing is to take care of ourselves, and each other. We have to, too many folks love us and need us! I don't know if this silly lump is cancer or just a silly little lump, but it's important to find out! Either way, it's all just another part of the adventure!

Pink Promise Rose

(My Garden 2012)

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience

 in which you really stop to look fear in the face."

~Eleanor Roosevelt

Mood: Curious

~Me :)

Pickles

"I had a dream about you. You were storing my brain in a pickle jar in the fridge, 

and I only discovered it when I went to garnish my hamburger. 

Mindless and hungry, I was a US politician's ideal voter."

~Jarod Kintz

We Had A Dream #DreamAboutYou

Pickles are good. I love spicy pickles better than the sweet pickles. I love dill spears, but not the stackers. I like relish, but I like the relish with the mustard in it, not the kind with the ketchup. Although I love ketchup... just not with my pickles, unless it's on a hot dog, and even then I tend to forgo the pickle relish and the ketchup, and just put mustard and cheese on my hot dogs, but occasionally I will have a hot dog with chopped onion and chopped tomatoes, but I never have tomatoes or onions on my hamburgers, I don't like vegetables on my burgers because the hot meat patty tends to make the veggies slimy, so I have my veggies on the side. I usually eat the veggies like a small salad, that comes without croutons. It's a good way to get a salad for free. I don't ask for salad dressing, I ask for 3 sides of mayonnaise, and a side of pickle relish, then I take the relish and mix it into the 2 sides of mayonnaise, then add just a dash of ketchup, which makes my famous homemade Thousand Island dressing. And what do I do with the 1 extra side of mayonnaise?

 Dip my french fries in it of course! I like ketchup with my fries also, but not at the same time.

 There are rules to these things!

Mood: Hungry

~Me :)

Pickles
Photographed 2/23/2005
11:50 AM
Konica Minolta

Art About Town: Oakland, California... "Trumpet Flowers" By Karen Cusolito

"Trumpet Flowers"

By Karen Cusolito

Oakland, California 2013

"Great Things are done by a series of

small things brought together."

~Vincent Van Gogh

This is a photo from the archives, from May of 2013, but it wasn't part of the series of sculptures I included in the set I posted. I am not sure why I didn't include it, perhaps it was too dark, or I couldn't quite get an angle on it that was pleasing to me at the time, I am not sure, but when I found it yesterday it kind of made me happy inside, and reminded me that I need to go in search of some new public art placements. I love pieces like this one, it is made entirely of recycled steel. It's great when a piece of art not only inspires, but springs forth from something else once useful but is now discarded. It's like when the body dies, and the soul is finally free. 

"Put your ear down close to your soul, and listen hard."

~Anne Sexton

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

"Trumpet Flowers" 

By Karen Cusolito

Photographed 5/27/13

2:38 PM

Konica Minolta

Extremely Stupid And Incredibly Useless

"Technology offers us a unique opportunity, though rarely welcome, to practice patience."

~Allen Lokos

Patience: The Art Of Peaceful Living

Finally, in just about two weeks my contract with AT&T will finally be up and I can unload this piece of crap cell phone! Sigh. I hate to say that because while it might be the worst cell phone ever, for reasons I will get to, it is one of the best, if not the best point and shoot camera I have ever owned! In fact, long after I choose a new cell phone, I will still be charging this phone... urrr... camera to take along with me when I go on photo jaunts. It is excellent in low light conditions, it takes crisp macro shots, and even the action shots come out amazingly crisp and clear looking! The camera really is amazing in that it is only 8 megapixel. The pictures it takes are really quite lovely!

 Here are a couple examples...

The HTC Vivid is not the first phone by HTC that I have owned. My phone just prior to this one was the HTC Aria. That phone was great, in fact it never gave me a moment of trouble. I decided to upgrade to the Vivid because the Aria was quite small and I felt I needed one that fit a little better in my hands. Not that I have big hands or anything, I just felt a bigger phone would make some things easier. Anyway, I liked the company a lot, but I have been noticing that their products don't get the ratings they used to, so I will probably be going with a completely different manufacturer next time.

I have been shopping around and I think I have it narrowed down to the Samsung Galaxy S5 or the LG G3. We'll see. Sometimes I wish my cell phone wasn't necessary, but let's face it, the cell phone may have just been a fun gadget at one time, but in the world we live in, it's become many other things, such as a household tool, a safety device, a learning device, a media device, and a source of entertainment. I could live without a cell phone prior to 9/11 but now... not so much. I appreciate being able to communicate with Alan should the unthinkable occur again. I feel safer knowing that I can get an alert from local news and CNN, although sometimes I dread reading the news alerts I get. Like the day Robin Williams died. I heard the alert tone, looked at my phone, and then couldn't function for the next few hours. I couldn't even say the words that I saw on my phone, when Alan asked me what was wrong... I just handed to him.

Even now... looking at the words... it just seems so incredibly unreal. Alan and I were crossing the bridge into San Mateo, when I heard an alert on my phone. I didn't check it because we were having a deep conversation about our friend who had taken his own life a few months earlier. All night, the night before, I had been ruminating on suicide. Not mine, but just in general, and I didn't know why. So, as we drove along, I was asking Alan if he had noticed if some of our other friends seemed unusually preoccupied or seemed unusually depressed. To my relief he said no, our circle of friends were coming to terms with what had happened and would process verbally to him if needed. A few minutes later we stopped at a little bagel shop, Alan went in, and I stayed in the car, tired from lack of sleep. I decided to check the alert, and there it was! My heart... my heart began to pound out of my chest. I knew he lived just across the bay, and suddenly the world, especially the bay, seemed so damn dark. It's a feeling, I hope I never, ever experience again! It took me over a month to erase that alert off my phone. I didn't want to let go. But I did eventually. We have to... right?

So, like everything else that's ever been invented, the cell phone is a constant source of help and hurt. Of crisp, clear January days, and days spent in happy frolic to moments of fear and sorrow. The cell phone lets us keep in touch while on the go, and keeps us up to date on what we need to know right now. I get to play word games with friends, and capture sunsets with its camera. I can save a recipe and take the recipe shopping with me. Owing a cell phone is fun, much more fun than it is heartbreaking. We live in a world where we can face dangers we didn't 20 years ago, and we have had to adapt to new ways of living. I just wish our government wasn't tapping in! But, if they feel they need to know what recipe I am making for dinner, or that I don't let go of love easily well, that's fine. Who knows maybe I can make them feel less alone. If anyone is listening in. One can't worry about everything, right?

A cell phone, my cell phone in particular, might be extremely stupid and incredibly useless, but it is, however, the best necessary evil in my life. Hey, it's not all bad, at least it entertains as well as breaks my heart.

That's Life.

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

HTC Vivid

Photographed 1/15/15

11:00 PM

Nikon CoolPix S3500

Berkeley On A January Day

"I will go to campus alone dressed in antique silk slips and beat-up cowboy boots and gypsy beads, and I will study poetry. I will sit on the edge of the fountain in the plaza and write."

Francesca Lia Block

Girl Goddess #9: Nine Stories

A couple years ago I posted a set of photos that highlighted what I love about Berkeley. It's been a while since I have posted anything new from around town, I am not sure why, I just seem to do most of my photos of Berkeley either within the acres of Tilden Park, or sunset photos from Grizzly Peak Boulevard. Both lovely mind you, but it's far from telling the whole story of Berkeley. So, above is a photo of a January day in 2005, which looks pretty much the same today, as it did back then, and below the collage from 2013 and a new one I put together today from archived photos. I need to get out and about with the camera soon, well, as soon as my Fibromyalgia gives me a break. Hopefully next week sometime. Until then, here is a look at one of the loveliest cities I know... Berkeley, Ca.

Set #1 From 2013

Set #2, From The Archives...

Art
Free Speech
Museums
Sather Tower
Cool Mannequins
Gorgeous Trees In Autumn
Tilden Botanical Garden
Tilden Little Farm
The Berkeley Marina
Tilden Park Carousel
 Shattuck Avenue
And there's so much more, so stay tuned!

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

Dear Woody...

"To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer.
 To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy.
 Therefore, to be happy one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness."

~Woody Allen

Dear Woody

In that you have just launched a brand new venture with Amazon Prime to write and produce a new TV series, and are currently in the development stage, may I respectfully request it be set in San Francisco? I know, I know, I tended to stalk... um... enthusiastically pursue your filming schedule while you were here in the Bay Area in 2012, but I promise, if I do come across you, I will immediately turn and walk the other way. I promise to never again wear black and gray together... what was I thinking that day? I promise to take lots, and lots, and photos, from a fair distance of course, and then promote, promote, promote your new creative project with great enthusiasm! And hey, one very important thing to consider, on a practical note, our brilliant governor, Jerry Brown, just signed a bill that TRIPLES California's tax credit for film and television! New York is lovely, and I would love to see it one day, but it's been done to access in films and on the small screen, but San Francisco... that's a city of true love and sourdough, and the true love of sourdough! You wrote it yourself, in Blue Jasmine, "If you can't fall in love in San Francisco, you can't fall in love anywhere!"

Sincerely

Carly from Berkeley

Tuesday, January 12th 2015

8:35 PM

Woody Allen

Photographed August 25th 2012

Ulloa and Claremont

San Francisco, California

Life's Rewards

"The biggest reward of a lifetime is finishing day after day with a smile on your face."

~Eric Sennevoight

The World's Game

Aren't they the cutest little salt and pepper shakers ever? I got two sets of them last December, and a nice little movie ticket package, by chasing in my Stouffer's Dinner Club points. I love Stouffer's, and Stouffer's Lean Cuisine for my lunches. I don't mean to sound like a commercial, but they are really good meals, and the calories are just about right! So, most of the time, with the exception of the occasional I HAVE TO GRAB A GREASY BURGER rampage, that's what I do for lunch, so why not save the 20 points per box... right? In the time that the rewards program was in existence, Alan and I went to the movies for free 4 times, and I got two sets of these cute bird shakers! Yay me!

Lets see... each Stouffer's box was worth 20 points. It takes 2,000 points for each movie ticket package, and 350 points for each salt and pepper shaker set... that comes to...

 Movie Tickets = 300 Stouffer's Lunches

 Salt And Pepper Shakers = 52.5 Lunches

Yep. That's just about right.

But that's spread out over some 5 years or so. You know, because of the occasion burger rampage. Stouffer's recently discontinued their rewards program, so no more luxuries to save for from them. They are supposed to be lunching some new program "soon." I hope so, I like participating in this type of program and I will miss it. But in the meantime I also save points from Coke and Fresh Step cat litter. Not quite as glamorous as Stouffer's, but the box must be scooped, so a little reward of a new set of cat toys makes me incredibly happy! LOL. 

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

Advice For Your Monday...

"Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless,

 and add what is specifically your own."

~Bruce Lee

Ugg. I hated it when California made it illegal to hold a cell phone while driving. Mind you, I wasn't anti-safety and it wasn't because I am so busy and so popular that I must be available for phone calls, no, the reason was because the people I heard the most squawking from, within my circle of peeps, were the ones who had held out and refused to buy a cell phone! Now, okay, previously to the new law I had indeed held a cell phone and drove at the same time, but I have never texted anyone while driving, because I am all thumbs! I don't know how folks do it! How do people text so darn fast using all their fingers? Sheesh!

Anyway, when it comes to cell phone use, in day to day life I do more texting than I do talking. Because of the law? No, I have Bluetooth in my car, so if a call comes in I just say "Hello" and talk through my awesome radio, or hit the decline button, and happily continue on my way. But every single time I am out in the car, apparently law be damned, I still see folks talking away on their cell phones. I don't mind really, it's their possible ticket to enjoy, but I am curious about what can't wait until the get to where they are going? Does driving with a cell phone in your hand really make things more dangerous? Or could it be who you are talking to, and the content of the conversation that's the problem?

I have been considering this for years, but even after all this time, I am not sure how to feel. In the end, I have to obey the law, and try to not engage in any screaming matches while talking over my awesome car radio! So, I guess I will never really know unless one day, one of my friends, or my hubby, pisses me off but good while I am driving. That should do it! In the meantime I love the bumper sticker I spotted on this car the other day. Do you suppose they got the dent before, or after the NO HOLDING A CELL PHONE LAW TOOK AFFECT?

Mood: Curious

~Me :)

A Guy Named Joe

"The only thing a cat worries about is what's happening right now.

 As we tell the kittens, you only wash one paw at a time."

~Lloyd Alexander

Time Cat

I love our little guy Joey. How anyone could have dumped this beautiful child on a bridge is beyond me. I am just thankful that he probably doesn't think much about that time, and those awful crows that were making a meal of him when Alan found him, I am just glad that the memory that seems to stick the closest to him, is the one of his great love of pizza, and Italian food in general. He is a beautiful child, and while he wasn't in the plans, we love him so deeply that I can't remember what it was like to not have him around. I didn't know I needed him, but fate did, and apparently fate kinda likes me!

 It's been a happy 13 months!

Mood: Happy

A Year Of Joe 

Created January 10th 2015

Yeah, What He Said

"Sometimes I arrive just when God's ready to have someone click the shutter."

~Ansel Adams

Yeah, what he said! If I take good pictures, well, it's because I know the basic function of a camera. I mean, how do you take credit for a sunset? Or a cute animal? Or sometimes... just being in the right place... at the right time? I suppose it takes a creative urge to capture the fleeting, or the selfishness of keeping a moment forever. Maybe it's the pursuit of the unobtainable. Maybe that's it. Who knows. I do know that I love the surge of adrenaline of snapping a photo, and accomplishing something personal, that I can share. You see, being a private person means there is very little I am prepared to share, but by sharing my photography, well, that tells you all about what truly makes me... me.I didn't have to know the man in this photo, I got to know him silently, as he thoroughly enjoyed his dinner, a beautiful sunset, and some meditation!

 And a little while later, I got to say...

 Yeah, what he said!

This is just one set of many photos I have recently added to my Flickr account. Click on the link to see whats past, whats present, and what might come in the future!

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

Sugar Cookie ANTS!

"Ant #1: So, uh, do you ever worry that your itsy little neck is just going to snap under the weight of your head?

Ant #2: Stop asking me that. You ask me that, like, every five minutes.

Ant #1: Sometimes I notice my antennae out of the corner of my eye and I'm all, like, AHH! Something is on me! Get it off! Get it off!

Ant #2: Yeah, the antennae again. Listen, I just remembered, I have to go walk around aimlessly now."

~Jim Benton

Okay, So Maybe I Do Have Superpowers

Ugg. The Christmas cookies were a big hit! I made a batch, then I made another batch, then I decided to make yet another one for New Year's. I think technically the New Year's cookies were the biggest hit, if you consider there are currently about a 1,000 ants in my house. Still, a good review is a good review! It's good to know that old fashioned sugar cookies are still enjoyed by people and ants.

 If you are having an ant problem try putting a line of cinnamon down between you and the ants... they won't cross it. And a plus... cinnamon is non toxic to dogs and cats, and most outside critters. We dust the house inside and out after the rainy season is over, and then repeat every four weeks or so! Another excellent product is Orange Guard. I found it at Whole Foods! It smells wonderful, and is again, safe for use around pets!

:)

"Ants don't make me nervous. They make me antsy."

~Jarod Kintz

Whenever You're Gone, I'm Here For You

Mood: Happy But Busy

~Me :)

ANTS!
Photographed 1/6/15
10:21 PM
HTC Vivid

Je Suis Charlie

"The moment you say that any idea system is sacred, whether it's a religious belief system or a secular ideology, the moment you declare a set of ideas to be immune from

 criticism, satire, derision, or contempt, freedom of thought becomes impossible."

~Salman Rushdie

(Defend The Right To Be Offended)

Open Democracy, 7 February 2005

So, is 2015 going to mimic 2014?

 Will there be more tears than laughter yet again?

Mood: Quiet

Graphic Created January 7th 2015

A Well Made Mouse

"When the mouse laughs at the cat, there's a hole nearby."

~Nigerian Proverb

Meet the newest toy in our house. An IKEA mouse named Winny. Yes, I named the mouse, but the boys approved. We like IKEA toys in our house because they are machine washable. My boys PLAY with their toys, sometimes they put them in really odd places. Under the couch, under the bed, in their BOX. Yes, a machine washable, well made mouse is the way to go! Yes. Just ask my three little boys!

And there is a really nice bonus to buying toys at IKEA...

 they make a $1 donation to children's charities for each soft toy purchased during the holidays.

If they make that a tradition, so will I!

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

Winny Mouse
Photographed 1/1/15
10:20 PM
NIKON CoolPix S3500

Something Interesting In An Ordinary Place

"To me, photography is an art of observation.

 It's about finding something interesting in an ordinary place... 

I've found it has little to do with the things you see and everything to do with the way you see them."

~Elliot Erwitt

Here is my first portrait of the year! I love taking candid shots of people just living their life. It all began with brides in Golden Gate Park, and from there the project has just evolved. I try not to disturb the subject, because it alters the view of the every day life. I just enjoy seeing people being people. In this case, however, I was a bit annoyed that with an entire parking lot, let alone a very nice car, this man chose to stand next to my car to smoke his cancer stick. Why do people do that? I don't want the smell of their stinky habit in my car anymore than they do! People... please don't do that! Oh well, at least I got a photo out of it! And in a weird way, by the time I had taken the photo set, I was glad I got a chance to capture not just the man, willing to stand in the pouring rain to smoke, but for the chance to photograph the rain as a starring component.

So... any thoughts? Care to caption the photo? 

Mood: Happy

~Me :)

 

The Day You Wake Up To

"Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!

There are points to be scored. There are games to be won.

And magical things you can do with that ball

Will make you the winning-est winner of all.

Fame!

You'll be as famous as famous can be,

with the whole wide world watching you on TV.

Except when they don't,

Because sometimes they won't.

I am afraid that sometimes

You'll play lonely games too.

Games you can't win

'cause you'll play against you."

~Dr. Seuss

Oh The Places You'll Go!

I love the first Monday after a long holiday weekend. I love that the TV schedules get back to normal, I love that the news and political sites are, once again, covering the latest developments, and I love that the everything seems fresh and new. I suppose the first Monday after the New Year's holiday has that feeling like no other time. I was finished with 2015, at the end of the day Robin Williams died. I remember falling into bed, exhausted from grief, and thinking that I was done! The year couldn't possibly be salvaged. And if it could, if anyone had a special formula, I didn't need to know about it! My mind was throughouly made up! Don't even bring it up! But, a couple months later, I found myself on vacation, and spending a lot of time with Alan, and little by little, I eased back into the reality of the year, and where I was in it. I was still grieving, and one or two more losses took place after his death, but I was back to laughing, and exploring with the camera, putting my feet forward. And as I did. I came up with some good photographs, stuff I am proud of. I just did it. I learned to live with all the pain of the year. From the suicide of a friend, to Robin's death, to the drama with GM and the car recalls, to whatever stupid thing hurt me. I dealt with it through my photography, with  the season of autumn's help.

Today, I am waking up to a much different day than Real Housewives Of New Jersey star, Teresa Giudice, will. She was sentenced last October to 15 months in prison, her husband 41 months for various crimes of fraud, dating back nearly 15 years, which is pretty much their entire marriage. By most accounts, Teresa has been in denile about the time she will serve, so as she begins her journey today, I can only imagine the pain she must be in as she says goodbye to her home, parents and brother, her community, her businesses, her standing, her name, but saddest of all, her four daughters. Four girls, all under 16, will have to suffer the loss of their mom, at an age when a daughter most needs their mother. Now, 15 months isn't forever, but without coping skills, it is more than forever. Those days when the only one who could possibly understand how a girl feels, is the mom, and mom isn't there. Life doesn't get harder than that. Not when you are a little girl.

I suppose Teresa will be feeling a bit like a little girl herself today. She won't have anyone but herself to lean on. She will be scared... I would be. Wouldn't you? She will be grieving her life... I would be. Wouldn't you? She will make missteps... I know I would. She will want nothing more than anything to go back in time and change the mistakes she made. She will just want to go back... to just get it right. To not trust the wrong people. To not want more than she could realistically have. To just not take the road she took that lead her where she is. When the lights go off tonight, she will be grieving. Deeply. A situation of her own making? Yes. To be sure! But the pain she is about to feel, well, that will drive home the fault, and she is now on her way to paying back those who have been wronged. Will it be enough? God, I hope so. I hope she comes out with all kinds of strength, so she never ends up down the rabbit hole again! Not only for her, but for those four girls.

I would love to see her come out of this situaiton with courage. New found courage that doesn't involve turing over tables, or living outside her means. I want to see Teresa Giudice come out of this fierce! I want to see her write a "How To" guide to prison, or maybe a prison cookbook of her own. I want to see her find her sense of humor about herself, rather than lifting herself up by the concentrating on the fall of others. I want to see her SHINE. I want her to see the beauty, like on a walk around Half Moon Bay. She missed the natural beauty of the town when she visited their a few years ago. She missed it because she was too busy dealing with the pain in her life. The things that scared her, such as the failing relationship with her husband Joe. Truth is, that relationship probably truly began to crumble right before she became famous. Fame... there's that word. Fame. Sigh. Now there is some talk that Teresa and Joe's daughter is shooting a pilot for her own "reality" show. I don't know why. Maybe to help out. Maybe to understand the world of reality TV better. Maybe to establish her own fame. If it is the last one, I have to say, God, I hope not. Teresa has a real chance to come out of this situation a smarter, more empathetic, more realistic person. I hope she will, and I hope people will let her, because isn't that the best thing for not only her victims, her family, her community and herself?  And isn't that the point?

 Fame... No Thank You.

Today, Teresa will wake up in a different world than she will go to sleep in, but by the same token, at the end of the journey, the process will swing back the other way. It's what we do with the hours in between.

The sun rises and sets on us all.

Mood: Reflective

~Me :)

Sundown At Half Moon Bay (Archived)

Photographed 2/25/14 

5:35 PM

Kodak Easy Share

Sometimes They Come Back

"I got food poisoning today. But I am not sure when I am going to use it."

~Steven Wright

I am very pleased to say that I have never given myself, nor anyone else, food poisoning. I have a fairly mild case of the food meanies right now, caught from some uniquely bad food I purchased at a Mexican restaurant on Friday night. OH MY GOD. Never again. When I read to Yelp review several months ago, the place seemed okay. Most folks liked the cheap prices, and apparently they are well known for their "Orange Sauce." Let me tell you... BLECH. Salty, separated and strange tasting. Nothing about it to like. I ordered the cheese enchiladas plate, that came with the rice and beans on the side. I figured meatless and mild was the way to go, boy was I wrong. While the enchiladas were nice and cheesy, as they should be, something just didn't taste right about them. The beans were really tasty... but cold. No heat at all. Like they came from a can. And the rice was, again tasty, and again cold. Cold as the air outside.

 About half way through the meal, I stopped eating. Half way through my meal I had apparently formed two large bricks in my stomach. LARGE BRICKS WITH SPICE ON THEM. I was pretty much in pain the rest of the night. Well, pain, and trips to the bathroom. Sigh. I should probably go write a lengthy Yelp review, detailing vividly how the food came back on me, but why? Other folks who have been to this establishment are split down the middle. This is one of those places that either one loves or they hate, but the people who hated it, ended up with the same circumstances as I did. So, rather that engage in online bashing, I am going to call the Health Department on Monday and suggest they have a look see for themselves. Too many folks have become ill in the same way I did, for it to be a mere coincidence. I am pretty sure what got me was the improper handling of cheese.

Damn shame. I used to love Mexican food, in fact it was my favorite cuisine.

It  really, really was. 

And the thing is, I am still liking 2015 better than 2014

Mood: None

~Me :)

Tortilla Chips (Archived Photo)

Photographed October 31st 2013

1:58 PM

Kodak Easy Share