Thursday, January 28, 2021

Hanging On By A Blue Egret

 

"As a species we're fundamentally insane. Put more than two of us in a room, we pick sides and start dreaming up reasons to kill one another. Why do you think we invented politics and religion?
 
~Stephen King
 
 
I was retired from political observation, right? Joe Biden being elected president would fix my need to drown myself in political scandal, intrigue, and tragedy... right? Okay, there would be the occasional hiccup, but that's to be expected. January 20th is the day I begin to heal from all I have feared the last 5 1/2 years. I will be able to sleep again. I'm going to take a six month nap, because the man who blew himself up on Christmas Day was a one-off. I will smile again. Sleep again. Eat without a pit in my stomach. No more feeling like I have to have MSNBC in every room that has a TV in it, because I am terrified that an idiot president might launch the nuclear codes.
 
What Was I thinking?
 
Yesterday, In The News
 
*As it turns out, if we haven't gotten our second stimulus check, we more than likely won't. We will have to apply for a credit on our tax return. That wasn't part of the deal. I mean, how exactly does that stimulate the economy? It was such a small amount that we were planning on using it to pay the taxes anyway, but it would have been nice to be able to at least put it in the safe in case something bad happens between now and April 15th. Thanks Mnuchin. And Trump.
 
*GOP leader Kevin McCarthy went to Florida for an audience with Donald Trump. A couple weeks ago, McCarthy said Trump was to blame for the attack on the Capitol.
 
*The Justice Department is warning of violence breaking out, before, during or after the upcoming Impeachment trial.
 
*This past week, Donald Trump created, "Office Of The Former President." Which is a new one. Ordinarily, former presidents simply go away and enjoy the rest of their lives. Not Cheeto-Jesus. He is apparently planning to insinuate himself into our lives for sometime to come.
 
*Not to be outdone, Melania Trump hired two assistants yesterday, to help her continue her work with her "Be Best" campaign. Again, most first ladies go quietly about their lives, in civilian life, and allow the incoming first lady to handle her new duties and platform without interruption or competition for attention. 
 
Donald Trump's supporters continue to believe that Joe Biden stole the election. He didn't, but that's not good enough for the cultists. They truly believe the lie. They believe their leader, because that's what unstable folks do. They believe the lie at all costs. Jobs, family, friends, neighbors, life in general ceases to matter, just their leader and achieving their ultimate goals. In this case, human life appears to matter very little to these folks. The goal must happen at all costs. See, Jonestown, The Branch Dividian Church, or Heaven's Gate cults. None of them ended without bloodshed. And a lot of devastated families. Life has repeated itself too many times, in my lifetime, to not notice the similarities with the Trump cult.
 
Sigh.
 
I want to be wrong, but I am terrified. All I want is a quiet life. For some rest from the lunacy of the last four years, and to have a little hope that societal and political tensions will calm. Politics will always be batshit, and it's never been for the faint of heart, but the level of stress and fear I have felt have had a detrimental affect on not just my mental health, but on my physical health as well. I am scared to death that I will never be able to live my life, without a Trump, somewhere, affecting every single day. I just want it to be over, now that it is over.
 
This past week I got to rest. I read a little from a new book I purchased. We watched some movies. I ate a little better. I did some photography, and listened to some music. I started a new playlist on Spotify. Encouraged a friend. All that sounds great, right? But little by little the fear has crept back in, as more unfolds about what all is happening in our American existence. America is a dark place to live, and it's getting darker. Trump, and some of his minions are off social media, so at least Twitter is a lot nicer place to be, but the batshit just never stops, and it is a concern of mine, that for it to stop, something tragic will have to take place. I am afraid we are going to see another day like 9/11, and the powers that be on the right, see it coming too, but don't care, because they are still scared to death of Donald Trump.
 
So, what's a more than causal observer of politics to do? I can care, or I can be the person who refuses see the unpleasantness so they can look away. Well, if those are my choices, you know where I fall. I have never been able to ignore politics. When I see the rise of fascism, the granting of credibility to conspiracy theories and attempted coups of America, how exactly do I look away? I can't. But I may try to find some balance. After all, Trump isn't in power... Biden is. I have my reading. My venting here. Autumn images. And I have my bird watching. All things I am currently enjoying. Although, bird watching is probably my favorite of the activities I mentioned. Sigh. The problem is, some days I feel like I am just barely hanging on by a blue egret. 
 
~Carly

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