Falling

"Autumn is the hardest season. The leaves are falling, and they're falling like they are falling in love with the ground."

~Andrea Gibson

Depression. Unhappiness. Restlessness. Despair. Whatever you want to call it, I am feeling it. The past week feels like it has been six months long. An Election less than a week ago, should have me walking on cloud nine, instead I am barely able to catch my breath from the overwhelmingly sad events that occurred around it. Shootings, wildfires, devastation, and I am running on empty in my okay world. It feels selfish to feel as sad and tired as I do, when I know so many have lost their homes, and loved ones. But I do. I feel bad for feeling bad. Sometimes I don't know where my depression begins and ends, but I am learning to hide it when I can. I let it out here, because it feels safe to. I assume no one comes by, so it feels okay to just be honest. But it gets harder to admit that I feel like I am sinking more and more every day. Thank God I have my leaves, but after that, I am not so sure where my creativity will take me, or even if it will take me anywhere at all.

Shrug.

My prayers go out to those affected by the Camp Fire and the firestorm in Los Angeles. I pray for my friends and strangers, who are watching their lives change forever. I pray for all the families who lost loved ones in the Borderline massacre. I wouldn't wish the pain they are being forced to endure on anyone.

#50 Leaf Of The Day

November 10th 2018

Photographed October 21st 2018

Ione, California

~Mood: Sad/Tired

~Me