This year's Oscars Swag Bag is worth over $350,000! And I hate most of what's in it! I mean I'll take the exclusive Artic villa getaway, but what were they thinking with the Prenups? I kid you not, prenuptial agreements from, Trusted Prenups! Is that cynical or what? I'd love to have the tea and chocolate deliciousness though. I am sure this stuff comes in handy to the glamourous, like you and me, but the grateful and secure person that I am will just stay down here in the "extra's call room." On the other hand, if I could customize my dream swag bag, it would contain the following items.
My Dream Swag Bag
1. 10 days stay at the Hotel Le Negresco
With Learn French in France lessons at Centre International D' Antibes
2. A BMW 24 MA40i in San Francisco Metallic
3. Magnolia Bakery "Best Of New York" cupcakes
4. "Tiffany Hardware" watch in Tiffany Blue
5. Amish Popcorn from Williams Sonoma
6. Patricia Green Slippers
7. 10 Days stay at the Four Seasons Hotel and Spa in Calistoga, Ca
8. !0 Days at the Beverly Wilshire, Beverly Hills, Ca
9. Funko worth $500
10. Omaha Steaks $500
11. Z Chocolate French Macarons
12. $500 at Purr & Company
12. $500 at Ghirardelli Chocolate
13. Pumpkin Pecan Butter from Harry & David
10 Days stay at the. Royal Lancaster London
11. 10 Days Stay at the Hawthorn Hotel, Salem Massachusetts.
In October
12. $2,000.00 at Barnes & Nobel
14. Christian Dior Poison Set
all versions in the Poison range
15. Lancôme Absolute Longevity Facial Cream
And that's it!
I know, I know, it's a wee bit unreasonable. Expensive. But if I am going to get a retroactive Oscar for the two movies I starred as an extra in, or the Woody Allen movie my car starred in, then why not dream BIG! As you might gather from my choices, I need a vacation. I really wish I could just have a few days in an amazing hotel, with all the wonderful perks available, but I could settle for a stay at Extended Stay America, and all I need is Uber Eats and a book by the pool.
Maybe One Day/Someday
Okay, I got the dress. I got the snacks. I got the beverages.
I got the ballots, and I am ready to have a little fun.
Are you watching too?
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