and most of these times, a gathering of autumn leaves."
~Goitsemang Mvula
It looks like tiny diamonds, but what it actually is, is a small weed, with dew from yesterday's fog, glistening on it's fine thread branches. It was a beautiful, no actually, stunning, autumn day. It had just enough clouds, light rain, and fog to make my photographs really nice. I was a very happy person, but it wasn't lost on me that soon I will be doing a lot more photos like this one, as the autumn season officially slips into it's own demise. Seasons come and go, and I only have a little over a month left in this one. I don't hate winter, it has it's place, the only thing that I don't like about it is that the leaves aren't there anymore lift my spirits and warm me inside, but this coming winter already has a bone chilling veil to it, that is intruding on this autumn, as if it carries a grudge for the hope the autumn provided this year. It feels jealous to me. Maybe it's that Trump is refusing to concede the race, and every day he wakes for the sole desire of making life as painful for everyone, but his sycophants and cultists, delivered in his usual wintry posture.
The inauguration is January 20th, will winter make our bare bones ache, or will it be a warm winter sun easing our minds, as the chilly winds blow past us? It's hard not knowing which it will be. There were protesters outside Secretary Of State Clinton's house last night, shouting their usual childish refrain, "lock her up." An old cry, but I fear everlasting. It all makes me so sad. This isn't politics anymore, it's something else, something dark and scary. Something tragic. It makes me depressed for what could come next. I am really brave on Twitter though, counseling others to ignore Cheeto-Hitler, to not give him the attention he seeks.
I'm a hypocrite telling them what to do, because I'm terrified too. It just hurts to hear how much pain they are in. The Cult of Trump won't be going away any time soon, but neither will the will of the 78,781,258 who just want to wake up to something other than a school yard bully who pitches mean tweets like spitballs. Maybe ignoring it is unrealistic at this point, but wallowing in it is unhealthy. It's a kind opioid, and the withdrawal will be painful. It's hard to make the decision to let go. It get it. As I have said, I am going to attempt my recovery, from casual political observation, by taking more photographs at ground level, lets see how long that lasts before the vomiting, chills and shakes, force me back into giving a shit.
This Matters.
~Carly
Stockton, California
November 16th 2020
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