Friday, January 13, 2006

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #94: Evil Earworms

"Without music, life would be a mistake. I would only believe in a God who knew how to dance."

-Friedrich Nietzsche

Weekend Assignment #94: What's the worst possible song to get stuck in your head? You know: the song that once you hear it you cannot drive from your skull, even with an ice pick and a centrifuge. They have a word for that kind of song: "Earworm." We want to know what you consider to be the most evil earworm possible.

Extra Credit: Is there a song that can drive the evil earworm out?

-John Scalzi

Ahhh...music. This week's weekend assignment was chosen by AOL Journal Land's very own Editor Joe, and a fine fun weekend assignment it is! I have been haunted by many a tune, and YIKES, doesn't it always haunt one at the most inconvenient time possible? Cool idea for an assignment Joe! Now, speaking of being haunted by a tune, in late 2003 and most of 2004, I couldn't get "Take The Long Way Home," by Supertramp, out of my head. Ugg! Well, at least it was pleasant to hear day and night for months at a time. Thanks goodness it wasn't my choice for the worst song ever. Either to have to listen to one time, let alone over, and over, and over again, Unceasingly, unending, like a stuck needle on a turntable. No, THAT song would be the melodramatic wonder, MacArthur Park, as sung by Richard Harris. My whole life...I have NO idea what the heck it is about...

Spring was never waiting for us girl
It ran one step ahead
As we followed in the dance
Between the parted pages and were pressed
In love's hot, fevered iron
Like a striped pair of pants.

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh No!

Huh? I mean I kinda get the feeling that maybe the relationship wasn't working out. I think. Shrug. But what's with all the food references? Is he hungry? Is he a chef in a fancy restaurant? Maybe he is a fry-cook in a greasy spoon. Shrug. And what's with, "In love's hot fevered iron...like a striped pair of pants." Sigh. LOL.

Extra Credit: There is help for irritating earworms, yep help is as close as your nearest copy of Chuck Berry's humorous hit, "My Ding-A-Ling." It just makes one smile. Observe...

When I was a little biddy boy
My grandma bought me a cute little toy
Two silver bells on a string
She told me it was my Ding-a-Ling...

My Ding-A-Ling, my Ding-A-Ling, I want you to play with my Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling, my Ding-A-Ling, I want you to play with my Ding-A-Ling

When I was a little boy in grammar school
Always went by the very best rule
But everytime the bell would ring
You'd catch me playing with my Ding-a-Ling...

My Ding-A-Ling, my Ding-A-Ling, I want you to play with my Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling, my Ding-A-Ling, I want you to play with my Ding-A-Ling

Once while climbing the garden wall
I slipped and fell and had a terrible fall
I fell so hard that I heard birds sing
But held onto my Ding-a-Ling...

My Ding-A-Ling, my Ding-A-Ling, I want you to play with my Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling, my Ding-A-Ling, I want you to play with my Ding-A-Ling

Once while swimming cross turtle creek
Man them snappers right at my feet
Sure was hard swimming cross that thing
With both hands holding my Ding-A-Ling...

My Ding-A-Ling, my Ding-A-Ling, I want you to play with my Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling, my Ding-A-Ling, I want you to play with my Ding-A-Ling

Now this here song it ain't so bad
Prettiest little song you ever had
And those of you who will not sing
Must be playing with your own Ding-A-Ling!

Imagine having this song stuck in your head! LOL. :) Now imagine humming it to yourself while shopping at the grocerie store. Now, imagine singing the lyrics to yourself while shopping and not realizing your buddy, Rabbi Gold, is walking right behind you...Giggling...Hi again Rabbi Gold! ;) LOL. Be sure to pay a visit to Joe's journal, "Magic Smoke," to read his entry for this week's assignment. :)

-OndineMonet
"Musician In The Rain"
By Dorsineau

6 comments:

Karen Funk Blocher said...

Heh. I like MacArthur Park, in all its unmelodiousness and incomprehensibility! And I think I'm actually grateful that My Ding-A-Ling isn't on either of my Chuck Berry collections.

I'm gonna turn on my iPod now. For some reason, your My Ding-A-Ling lyrics have start Paul Simon seranading me with Loves Me Like a Rock.

Karen
6 1/2 hours last night - not as good as 8, but better than 5.

DesLily said...

gawd I remember "my dingaling"..i'm beginning to want to choke joe for this assignment.. too many people are coming up with songs and as soon as they say them i start hearing them in my head!! aggggggggggggggg it's friday the 13th.. do i need this too? lol

Julie said...

MacArthur Park is an interesting song... Maybe there is concern about the cake melting in the rain is all about the woman trying to win the man's heart with this special cake she had made just for him, and now it's in the rain, and the receipe is now floating down in the sewer? I dunno why or how the cake is outside in the rain either.. Is the rain really tears?! Hmm... Now I will be left wondering all morning..thanks!

Julie :)

Unhinged said...

Hah! I love, love, love MacArthur's Park (as it is sung by Donna Summer). And the Ding-A-Ling song has always drove me crazy.

You're nuts, Carly. NUTS.

;-P

redsneakz said...

ARGH! Now I'm going to be hearing MacArthur Park in MY head all bloody day.

Phinney said...

ok, this morning in PetSmart I heard THE most annoying earworm song ever. Linda Ronstadt singing Blue Bayou. EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW~!!! To get rid of the offending ear pollution, of course I listen to ANY song by Evanescence. If not available (for instance, if I'm in my CD-player-less vehicle...I turn on the most hard rock radio station there is and let it scream!