Sunday, November 05, 2017

Dark Horses

"A frightening possibility occured to him: maybe sometimes things didn't just go wrong and then stop; maybe sometimes they just kept going wronger and wronger until everything was totally fucked."

~Stephen King
"IT"
Last week, while we were in Quincy, enjoying the incredible beauty of the leaves, and sheer quaintness of the small town in Plumas County, in the middle of the stunning beauty, suddenly more than one thing stuck out to me as being quite ominous. The dark horse on their street lights, and the movie playing at what seemed to be their only movie theater, Stephen King's "IT." 

In past years, I found the street lights, of Quincy, kind of charming, but this year there was a certain feeling down in my bones, something feeding my fears and dread so deep, that I was thankful for the darkness, and loss of light to photograph the leaves we drove three hours to see. Last week, Quincy had a different feel. It was less quaint, and definitely more Derry, Maine, the town that Pennywise terrorized every 30 years.

Please don't get me wrong, the people of Quincy are quite lovely! They depend a great deal on leaf peepers and avid shutterbugs, such as myself, for a good deal of their tourist income. No, it was something in me, not them or really even the town. I don't know what to call it. Fear. Dread. Maybe even my good old friend depression, but something inside of me felt a cold chill when I looked at that horse, and then noticed through it, that IT would be playing all weekend.

I have been feeling those very feelings since before last year's election, with brief moments of respite, but I felt the same feelings again on Friday when I read about Donna Brazile's book regarding Hillary Clinton having rigged the primary against Bernie Sanders. And then when it was given validity by Elizabeth Warren, someone who I had considered a hero, but now I no longer feel I can trust. A Brazile's book has been widely debunked over this weekend, but I fear that some damage has been to the chances of two upcoming gubernatorial elections taking place next Tuesday in Virginia and New Jersey. 

How much darker will this country grow? Who are the good guys? Who are the bad guys? And how much longer until we find out who and what Pennywise actually is? Most of the time, I think of Donald Trump as Pennywise, because of his strong penchant for fear mongering. I know I now live in constant fear that the west coast will be wiped off the map, in the middle of the night by a nuclear missile from North Korea, but maybe Donald Trump isn't Putin's end game. Maybe it' something so unspeakable, I don't want to even speculate here, be carry around in my own conscienceness, and that I try to put out of my head whenever it yells... BEEP BEEP CARLY!

I don't know. 

God, how I wish I did.

One thing I do know, Donald Trump blocked Stephen King on Twitter some months back, so for now I know he is who I will listen to about defeating the fear, so that it's possible to defeat the clown. Alan and I are going next week to see the reboot of IT and maybe I will pick up some new tips, or maybe it's still the 1990 version, which was a pure masterpiece, that still holds the key of standing up to what scares us the most. I guess I will find out!

Quincy Scrapbook
October 28th, 2017

 #5 Leaf Of The Day
November 5th, 2017
Quincy, California

Mood:Weary
~Me

No comments: