John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #189: Amuse Me!

"It is a curious fact that people are never so trivial as when they take themselves seriously."

-Oscar Wilde

You know, I just had me a thought. I've been doing these Weekend Assignments for, what? Three and a half years now? Every Thursday, posting something to amuse you and give you something to post about over the weekend. And what do I get in return? Well, yes, I get paid. In cash, even. But where is the love? Where is my amusement? Where is my fun? Damn it, when do I get mine? Huh?

Weekend Assignment #189: Amuse Me, Damn It! Yeah, that's right. You amuse me for a change. Tell me a joke. Tell me a story. Show me a funny picture. Point to an good online video game. Suggest a good book or movie. Link me to a diverting YouTube or AOL video, like those soda/Mentos fountain things (but not that, I've already seen those). Anything, people, just as long as it's amusing. You know, something you think I would like. Like what, you say? Well, you know. Surprise me.

Extra Credit: Share your favorite pun. I love me a good pun.

-John Scalzi (By The Way)

Day 8 Of The 13 Diabetic Days Of Halloween!

Yep, I'm back from Nevada, and it is day 8 of my journey through the 13 Diabetic Days of Halloween. I wasn't sure how I might include the Weekend Assignment in with my series on how I am dealing with having diabetes during the Halloween season, but I found a away. And yes, at times it has been mighty amusing. I was actually chased by a good sized chicken the other day, while attempting to get in some walking time at a pumpkin patch. Having a chicken pecking at your pant leg will get you to walking at a moderate pace, I will tell you that!

It seems the chickens in Nevada are, well, let's just say, a bit temperamental. LOL. I don't think he cared for all the recipes I was talking to Alan about, which happened to have chicken as the main ingredient. I guess I was being a bit, "PI" or "Poultry Incorrect." I didn't get any photos of the red menace chasing me, because it is rather difficult to take a good photo, while a big chicken is stalking you... they aren't subtle about it... but I did get a number of other fun and amusing photos of the pumpkin patches I visited. So, here are the photos, and a few little Halloween themed jokes, which can be shared with the family, that I found on the Internet. John, I hope they make you laugh, or at the very least, bring you a smile. :)

Joke #1: why do witches use brooms to ride on?

Answer: Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy.

Joke #2: Why do mummies have trouble keeping friends?

Answer: They are too wrapped up in themselves.

Joke #3: What does a vampire never order at dinner?

Answer: A stake sandwich.

Joke #4: What do you get when you goose a ghost?

Answer: A handful of sheet.

Joke #5: How does a lady vampire flirt?

Answer: She BATS her eyes.

Joke#6: What is it like to be kissed by a vampire?

Answer: It sucks.

Joke #7: Why did the skeletin go disco dancing?

Answer: To see the boogyman.

Ok, so some of those are clunkers, but humor really is good for the soul. Thank you John, for lowering my blood sugar levels by encouraging me to get in touch with my silly side. Laughter is the best medicine. My glucose reading today, 2 1/2 hrs. after lunch was, 101! :)

Why did the vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal?

He heard it had a great circulation. :)

Extra Credit: "When she told me I was average, she was just being mean."

Halloween.com

-OndineMonet
"Mr. Happy Pumpkin"
Half Moon Bay, California
October 21, 2007
Afternoon