Saturday, February 01, 2014

Seeker Of Light

"No one lights a lamp in order to hide it behind the door: the purpose of light is to create more light, to open people's eyes, to reveal the marvels around."

~Paulo Coelho

I have been thinking about my friend Steven lately. I am not sure exactly why, maybe because we are in the middle of winter, and I know he would already be anxious for spring. He loved the color green, but he loved it when flowers burst forth with every color imaginable. He liked to photograph flowers, and butterflies, and he was amazing at it! His photos could absolutely take your breath away! I remember once, not long after we began our friendship, I told him that I was going to have to stop leaving comments on his blog, because I had ran out of adjectives.

He laughed.

And I, of course, continued to leave comments that never really conveyed just how impressed I was with his photography. 

I can't quite believe that it's been nearly 2 years since I learned of his passing. He died in October of 2009, just a week or so after his birthday, but I hadn't learned about it until 3 years later. People on the Internet come and go out of your life for a million different reasons. Some get tired of blogging and one day find themselves with nothing more to say. Some have busy lives, and make the decision to let real life lead them. Some, like my friend, pass away. 

I still think about Frank. What a force of nature he was. We didn't know each other long, but he made a big impression on me. He was so funny. So easy to talk to. Nice. He was a nice man. I still wish he would have listened to us and gone to the doctor! Pam. She died of lung cancer at 50. Well, she turned 50 just a week earlier. She was a great lady. She took time to help you if she needed it. She never made me feel unwelcome. She liked to cook, and she only used lower case i's because she said she didn't care enough to correct them! LOL. She had a way with the camera as well. Her death hit me hard, I think because we were close in age. Or maybe because she was my friend. Not sure which really. Maybe both.

Anyway, I don't mean to be maudlin. I am not sad really, in fact I was thinking the other day how much I have to thank Steven for, when it comes to my photography. His feedback and gentle guidance made me a much better photographer. I still have the hardest time remembering that he won't send me an email of encouragement out of the blue. He used to do that. Just out of the blue. I remember one day, back in the AOL Journals days, we in the community asked others to write a description of our blogs, from their point of view. Steven wrote mine.

 "Through the lens of Carly; wordsmith, photographer, and seeker of light."  


I used that description on my AOL Journal header for a long time. Well, until AOL closed that service back in 2005. I used it here for a long time as well, and then one day I decided to change things up a bit. I know he would have wanted me to move on. Still, the other day I was thinking about how much closer I tend to look at the backgrounds on my photographs, and how attracted I am to the natural light. I know it was because of him. His love a light lives on when I see something softly illuminated, or I see movement in butterfly wings. Sometimes, all I have to do is see the color green, especially the first real green you see when the earth has begun to have enough of all the darkness winter demands we endure. 

It's that first green that helps me seek the light.

Mood: Quiet But Grateful


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