A Photo A Day For 6 Months:Day 105~ 9 Years Ago Today
"You don't make a photograph just with a camera. You bring to the act of photography all the pictures you have seen, the books you have read, the music you have heard, the people you have loved."
Today is the 9th year I have been blogging. It doesn't seem like it could have possibly been that long, but it has. I had no idea what I was doing when I began my blog, I just knew it seemed like a good way to share about myself, and my therapist was overwhelmingly supportive of the endeavor. I think she would have approved of anything that would make me respond to life again. You see, due to a singularly mean spirited event that happened to me in 2000, I had spent roughly three years in a fully functioning, self induced coma. I was awake, and breathing, so to the causal observer I was fine, but to Alan and my therapist, I might as well have been in...well... a coma. After the event, which shall not be named, occurred, I shut down. And I did it so thoroughly that I developed Anhedonia. Let me tell you, Anhedonia is a pain like no other.
I don't want to spend too much time on this, because I couldn't be better now, but thinking back to the first day I started my blog, I know I wasn't sure it would do me much good, but I was willing to try, if for no other reason, then to prove how wrong both Alan and the therapist was for even suggesting it. But now, with that perfect backwards 20/20 vision, I know it was instrumental to my recovery. Anhedonia robs you of your ability to create. There is NO art. No developing recipes. No picking the perfect name for a pet. Hell, I couldn't even match up colors in my clothing when I was at my worst. Then one day, in the middle of the summer of 2003, I was swimming in my pool, and all kinds of emotions just began to swim over me. I was drowning in sadness, and happiness. I looked up and saw color again... the sky really was blue that day! huh...blue... go figure! I got out of the pool, went into the house, and checked out what this AOL Journals thing was all about.
And here I am. Plugging along. Anhedonia is only a stupid memory of my 3 year nap.
I have met so many wonderful people through blogging. I am thinking about them today. I miss my dear friends that have passed on. Pam. Kimberly. And of course, Steven. Steven was among my very first friends in the AOL Journals community. He began his journal, (sometimes) photoblog, just one day before I started Ellipsis. He was such a good photography teacher, he was helpful, and funny, and so understanding. He could tease with the best of them, but mostly he was a friend to whoever wanted to be friends with him. I miss him. So, so, much. I wish I could hop on over to his blog and say HAPPY ANNIVERSARY. But I can't. It's times like this when I think, well, Anhedonia has it's place. But then I quickly realize that just thinking that way, would do a terrible disservice to our friendship. Steven was not a defeatist, and he wouldn't encourage others to be that way either. He would verbally spank me for even considering that. He had a good soul, so I kinda think he knows how much I am missing him today, but he would be the first to tell me... "go find some light... go find some art. Stop dwelling on negative things."
So, that's what I did yesterday.
I found out Woody Allen was at a small grocery store on 24th and Florida in the city. Steven would have thought that was a hoot! Thinking of him, Alan and I grabbed a salad and headed for the Bay Bridge. It was a cool day, and we were both excited to have another chance at photographing the artist. When we got there, it was apparent we had left a little late, as the studio crew was in full packing up mode. I think Woody must have gotten there really early, and did the filming prior to the store's usual opening. Anyway, we had missed the boat, but because we are good with the idea of Plan B, we set about driving about the city looking for inspiration. Inspiration is one thing San Francisco is never lacking. Thank GOD.
As we drove along Mission street, at the end of the day, I spotted the two fellas you see in the photograph above. Aren't they great? It's actually a set of three "monstrous" faces and is called "Moonrise." The artist who created them is Ugo Rondinone. I have to go back and rephotograph them, because I was in the car when I spotted them and the third head was a out of my camera line. Personally, I adore them. They are whimsical and at the same time, I think I may have seen the one on the left in a nightmare when I was 3 or so. LOL. Anyway... they resonate with me. I would have them in my kitchen if I could. Yep... my kitchen... yes!
I love most public art. It gives any visitor to a city a much clearer impression of what the city is about I think. Art provokes thought. Thought... emotion. I like these two, and personally I would be quite comfortable sitting and talking to them, as both kind of remind my of some of my therapists from years past. No joke!