Happy Thanksgiving

"I celebrated Thanksgiving in the old fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land."

-Jon Stewart

Ah...in less then 24 hours I will be sitting in front of my television, crying my eyes out at the sight of Santa at the end of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. I have NO idea why, but truly, it always makes me all sentimental. LOL. Alan gets his best laugh of the year, watching my burst into tears at the sight of Old Nick. Sigh. LOL. Actually I do see the humor in it, it is a silly thing to cause the weepys. I don't know, it's just one more of my personality quirks. :)

I was thinking last night, as I sat at the computer anticipating the holidays, about how much I will miss Ellipsis. I guess I always will. With each new entry here I feel a little more at home and I know in my heart that this is where I will stay. I know, I know...it was my decision to make, and I accept that, but what is so hard to accept is how much I miss about AOL Journal Land. I did some blog jogging last night , visiting old friends that I miss like Slomo (Amy). I read early comments left in her archives and saw how friendships grew. I saw some comments that had been left by Frank ...sigh...has it really been almost 2 years since he passed away?

The hardest thing for me in life, is losing a friend. Sometimes relationships go through ruptures and they are never able to recover from that, sometimes you get very lucky and time does it's magic and healing can take place. I have been able to do that recently with a couple people I care a lot about. Time is such a blessing. I don't know why Amy stopped journaling, she had some pressures in life that got big, and sometimes one simply can't find the words to explain how very bad it hurts. I expect that is what happened for her. Still...I just miss her.

It was a week ago that sent my "Goodbye" letter to my journal family, telling them of my intention to no longer write on AOL. It never once occurred to me while composing that letter, to ever give up on a single person I would be sending it to, that's why at the end of the letter I asked everyone who wanted to know where I ended up, to drop me an email so I could put them on my contact list. Sigh. I was so completely delighted to see so many of my Journal Land family, and even a couple new faces, come by to say, "I'm still here...I followed you." :) I feel a love here that I haven't felt anywhere else.

I have a flaw, one that sometimes I would just give anything if I could change, I have one of those hearts that once I give a piece of it to someone, it's theirs forever. I have never been able to take the piece back, no matter how bad they treat me. It is always theirs, and if I love them, the love never dies. That can be painful when faced with the knowledge that sometimes love ends. Maybe, as I begin to fix Thanksgiving dinner, and work on getting the decorations up, I am remembering all of you...and not taking a single one of you for granted. Frank was a lesson about how soon we can lose someone, we never really got to know...and how bad it can hurt. One time, a couple years ago, I considered making a change to Blogspot. I had a couple friends who sent me an email telling me that they would follow me anywhere. :) I thought they were just being nice...now I know...they meant it. Thank you for still being here, a week after the exodus. I am thankful for you!

PS: The night of the VIVI Awards, I made a bet with my date for the night, and good friend Sam. Well, I won my bet, and what I won was amazing. Sam had to write an entry about autumn, that also featured a recent photo of him. He did post a recent photo of himself, but he also posted some of the most beautiful sunset photos I have seen this year. His friendship has meant a lot to me this past year, and I am so glad I won my bet, because we all get to see the creative side of a fine man and friend. Go check out his entry. Thanks again Sam, for being such a wonderful escort to the awards.

Dock Lines "The Fall Of 1967"

Love, Carly
"Happy Thanksgiving"
Berkeley, California
November 14th, 2005
Afternoon

Note: About the photograph. I was driving through Tilden Park last week and go figure, I came across some wild turkeys. LOL. God I love digital photography!