The tears I feel today
I'll wait to shed tomorrow.
Though I'll not sleep this night
Nor find surcrease from sorrow.
My eyes must keep their sight.
I dare not be tear-blinded.
I must be free to talk.
Not choked with grief, clear-minded.
My mouth cannot betray
The anguish that I know.
Yes, I'll keep my tears til later...
But my grief will never go.
~Anne McCaffrey, Dragonsinger (Pern, #4)
Okay, I am okay. I was going to take a little time off, but I slept really well, and when I woke up today, my body wasn't in nearly as much pain as it had been. Sleep... solid sleep... is usually the key. I have to admit, getting stuff off my chest didn't hurt either.
I was pissed off. I am still pissed off. I expect I will still be pissed off come November 6th... Election Day. I do know that the process of blogging has been amazingly cathartic over the nearly 9 years I have been doing it. I processed the death of my mother. The death of some good friends. The death of the best cat ever.
But I have also shared my great joys. Dylan and Hendrix. My photography. The new friends I have made. The ridiculous situations I have found myself in. The amazing Twitter friends I have made, who make me smile every day.
You know... LIFE. It's an absurd system. When you hurt so bad you can't breathe... you have to get back up. When you are grieving, you have to get back up. When you are frightened... you have to get back up. When you miss a friend who you have lost... GOD DAMN IT...YOU STILL HAVE TO GET BACK UP.
Yeah, I am still pissed off. Until something is done, until one of the winner's running for president grows a pair of balls and stands up to the NRA I will be pissed off. Sometimes it feels like there isn't a moment to spare. If anything like what just happened in Aurora, Colorado, happened to Alan... look out. If it were to happened to me, again, look out. I will not roll over and die. If my death is inevitable, then so is the gunman's.
Never underestimate the power of a truly pissed off woman!
~Me :)
Please go now and take a look at the photography posted by my pal JR. Ooops... my awesomely talented pal JR. :)
JR
http://jrclinephotography.blogspot.com/2012/07/apadf6-70-72.html
4 comments:
<<< HUGS >>>>
I'm glad you are feeling better today. YAY!
I've worked through a lot of grief by blogging. When my wife of 27 years decided to divorce me and the children blogging is where I landed to release a lot of pain.
Sometimes I'm surprised I'm still blogging 10 years later.
That is a lovely rose photo. I like the point of view you selected.
Here is my link: http://jrclinephotography.blogspot.com/2012/07/apadf6-73.html
I have great respect for the power of a truly pissed off woman.
: )
I love the rose too..and your perspective. I may "borrow" the idea!
Hugs,
Nancy
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