Well, I am looking at it this way, if one has to receive bad news, this was the bad news to receive. My blood test results came back, at it seems, I have Type 2 Diabetes. Sigh. Bother. Well, into each life a little rain must fall... right? But gosh this year has been a pain. Have I mentioned how happy I will be on New Year's Eve this year? How much I will be smiling when the clock strikes midnight? LOL. I am a diabetic. I am a diabetic. I have Diabetes. No matter how I say it, or how many times I say it, it just sounds like it can't be right. I mean, while I admit I have a sweet tooth that goes straight to my soul, I don't really overindulge. I love my veggies. I could probably do better with getting more exercise, but jeepers, with my Fibromyalgia, it is so difficult. I do T'ai Chi and meditation to help with the stress, and yet, I have diabetes.
Still, there is a bright side to things, and I am focusing on that. My doctor tells me that we don't have to jump headlong into insulin. We are going to try managing it with some strict dieting, and glucose monitoring for the next 6 months. I will have to start checking my levels several times a week. Whew! The news could have been so much worse... I think. I have a class to attend, which is paid for through my HMO, which I am thrilled about, because that is where I learn how to take on this new challenge. :) I like taking classes, and educating myself. That is how I have come to terms with the majority of the difficulties I have had... by educating myself and taking out the mystery of what ailed or frightened me.
I will admit to a few tears after the phone call. Alan didn't see me cry, I waited until I was alone. He would have understood, but it was just such a personal thing, that I really needed to feel it all by myself. I am ok now. In fact, I made myself a bracelet. My doctor said I will need to carry a card, or get one of those ID bracelets to show I am diabetic, but that was not for me. I made myself a charm bracelet. I took some charms from other pieces of jewelry I own, that have some special meaning to me, and I bought some symbolic charms at Michael's, and I got a heart shaped ID tag at, where else? Petco. LOL. Well, if Elvis has to wear one for his Diabetes, then so do I. Now we match.
My Charm Bracelet Symbols...
Purple flowers - My garden and Alexandrite is also my birthstone
1 Green and 1 Gold cat bell - Every man I was ever involved with at one time or another referred to me as a "cat." Now I have bells. :) Also, we have 2 Saturn Ions, one in Green, and one in Gold.
A heart with a pearl in it - Pearl is my other birthstone
A purple heart with "Ever After" in it - Love
A cat holding a pearl - My Elvis
2 butterflies - They represent a metamorphosis, as do dragonflies. I am hoping to add a dragonfly charm, when I find one I like.
So, now the work begins. I don't know how I got Type 2 Diabetes, but I have it, and I am going to face it. I watched a friend of mine nearly kill herself, after she was diagnosed, by climbing so far into denial that she very nearly lost her life. I couldn't do anything, but watch helplessly as she ran head long into chocolate, and fatty foods, and well, all things bad for the diagnosed diabetic. One day, she could no longer live that way... and the road she had put herself on became very dark and very painful. I decided then and there, that if this ever happened to me, I would do my best to face it. And face it I will. Watch me. :) If I didn't, how would I ever look at Elvis again? He makes me brave. I still need to ask though... can this year be done now? I hate 2007! LOL.
Let the research begin...
"Razors pain you; rivers are damp; acids stain you; and drugs cause cramps. Guns aren't lawful; nooses give, gas smells awful; so you might as well live."
"My Charmed Life Bracelet"
July 27, 2007