"The individual woman is required... a thousand times a day to choose either to accept her appointed role and thereby rescue her good disposition out of the wreckage of her self-respect, or else follow an independent line of behavior and rescue her self-respect out of the wreckage of her good disposition."
For the most part I am a pretty flexible, but ever since the good old days of dating, I have had a rule that once applied to all my boyfriends, but which now applies to everyone. It's simple. If I have an appointment with you, I ask that you show up on time. If you can't be on time, because lets face it, sometimes things happen, that's fine, but in that case, I ask you to get to the meeting, or at least call me, within 30 minutes. Period. I think in the year 2007, we have enough availability to phones, that there should be no reason to be late for an appointment, without being able to at least call the other person and explain our circumstances. Sound reasonable? It's easier now, then it was in 1987, to get in touch with someone, and I think I was being reasonable back then.
So, if I am waiting for you, and you don't show up, I will leave, and go onto other things, in the hopes that you are perfectly healthy, but otherwise engaged. Gone are the days where I sit by the phone, wait in the rain, or hope on a star that someone will show up when they promise to. I expect folks to keep their promises and their word. Sometimes in life we have to compromise, but we never have to compromise ourselves. For anyone. If we set a precedent for being treated with disrespect, we should expect to be treated that way from that point after. Sigh. Sometimes stuff happens. I had an appointment to meet someone this past week, and they didn't show up... or call. So, after 30 minutes I left, and drove back across the bay, back home to Berkeley. Frazzled.
It didn't help my mood, to come home to an email that implied that the confusion was partly my fault. As it turns out, after looking up the address where we were supposed to meet in the, San Francisco Merchants Directory, I found out I was 100% correct on the directions I had provided. Sigh. Being 100% correct, doesn't happen often. I wanted to send a really immature email and say... "Here... see... YOU WERE WRONG." But really, what would that have accomplished? In the end... things would still be what they are now. A really nice opportunity left hopeless. Sometimes being right, doesn't help matters one little bit.
By the way, this was the third time this same person had messed up what time we were supposed to meet. The first time I waited by the phone for a phone conference, they didn't call when they said they would. We rescheduled. The second meeting, they said they would call at 12:00, they called 20 minutes early.Then we had this third meeting, which was supposed to be in person. Oh well, I guess they just missed the opportunity to meet and know the wonder that is me. :( It must be the year... I blame it on 2007. This simply isn't my year. Can it be over now?
You tell me. Do you have a rule, for expecting folks to be on time? Do you go about your business if they don't show up? How long do you wait for someone, if you have a set time to meet? Is it just as rude to show up early for an appointment, as it is to show up late? If someone sets a pattern with being irresponsible with time, do you grin and take it, or do you eventually say something? Opinions please.
My 2017 Reading List
5 months ago