Saturday, December 17, 2005

Mondegreens

"We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made."

-Dan Quayle

It has been a long time since I posted an entry about Mondegreens. You know, misheard musical lyrics. I swear there are so many songs in my personal library of misheard lyrics, that always left me wondering, "what could the artist have had in mind when they came up with those lyrics. LOL. For years and years the theme song to both "All In The Family" and "Maude" left me scratching my head in wonder. It all made perfect sense one day when I found out that the last lyric to "Those were the Days," the theme to "All In The Family," wasn't "Gee our old salad ran late, those were the days" but was rather, "Gee our old La Salle ran great, those were the days." Yeah, that makes a lot more sense! LOL. I looked up some mondegreens today at the "Archive Of Misheard Lyrics", and here are some that I thought might bring you a smile. If you have a personal favorite lyric that you have misheard and want to share, feel free to leave it in the comments section. :) I would love to hear about your personal favorite mondegreen.

"I Try" By Macy Gray
Misheard Lyric: Dan stranger, you're weird.
Actual Lyric: Games, changes and fears.

"Killer Queen" By Queen
Misheard Lyric: A built-in remedy for Kruschev's virginity.
Actual Lyric: A built-in remedy for Kruschev and Kennedy.

"Jet Airliner" By Steve Miller Band
Misheard Lyric: Big 'Ol Jed left the light on.
Actual Lyric: Big 'Ol Jet airliner.

"Tub Thumping" By Chumbawamba
Misheard Lyric: I get no towel, but I get hope again, you never gonna give me a towel.
Actual Lyric: I get knocked down, but I get up again, you ain't never gonna keep me down.

"I'd Really Love To See You Tonight" By England Dan & John Ford Coley
Misheard Lyric: I'm not talking about Bolivia.
Actual Lyric: I'm not talkin' about moving in.

"Down On The Corner" By Creedence Clearwater Revival
Misheard Lyric: Brewster hides the waffle and people just gotta smile. Rufus forms a duck face and solos for a while. Beaufort playing the rhythm house on his Kalamzoo, and Willie goes into a dance and the devils on kazoo.

Actual Lyric: Rooster hits the washboard and people just gotta smile. Blinky thumps the gut bass and solos for a while, Poorboy twangs the rhythm on his Kalamazoo, Willie goes into a dance and doubles on kazoo.

"Against All Odds" By Phil Collins
Misheard Lyric: 'Cause we shared the laughter and the pain, and even shared the cheese.
Actual Lyric: 'Cause we shared the laughter and the pain, and even shared the tears.

"Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore" By REO Speedwagon
Misheard Lyric: Corndog winter's night.
Actual Lyric: Cold dark winter's night.

"Can We Still Be Friends?" By Todd Rundgren
Misheard Lyric: It's a strange, savoir-faire.
Actual Lyric: It's a strange sad affair.

"Like A Virgin" By Madonna
Misheard Lyric: Like a German, touched for the very first time, like a German when there's hard cheese next to mine.
Actual Lyric: Like a virgin, touched for the very first time, like a virgin when your heart beats next to mine.

"Lyin' Eyes" By The Eagles
Misheard Lyric: She drives on through the night all constipated.
Actual Lyric: She drives on through the night anticipating.

"Paradise By The Dashboard Light" By Meatloaf
Misheard Lyric: So open up your thighs, I've got a big surprise.
Actual Lyric: So open up your eyes, I've got a big surprise.

Yeah...not quite the same thing huh? LOL.

-OndineMonet
"Just Another Autumn Night"
San Francisco/Oakland Bay Bridge
December 8th 2005
Late Evening

Friday, December 16, 2005

John Scalzi's Weekend Assignment #90: Holiday Memories

"Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time."

-Laura Ingalls Wilder

Weekend Assignment #90: Share a treasured holiday memory. If it happened during the holiday season (which means, basically, from the day after Thanksgiving to the end of the Bowl games), it's eligible.

Extra Credit: Fruitcake:Ever, you know, had any?

-John Scalzi

Ok, so there aren't many holiday memories from when I was a child that I care to dwell on, that's ok, because I don't happen to believe that one has to reach all the way back into the deep, dusty archives of one's personal experiences to come up with a beloved memory...in fact some of the nicest ones can sometimes be the newest ones we make. As a matter of fact, I was given a pretty nice memory gift this past Wednesday, when I got a very well timed phone call from my Aunt Amanda, who lives in Virginia and who I am convinced is psychic.

I see my therapist every Wednesday, and this past session she thought it might be a good idea if I laid out my plans for the upcoming holidays. Was I coping ok? Was I sad or feeling misplaced? All valid questions. It can be a strange feeling to know that you are alone in the world. That what blood relations that are close by as far as geography goes, might as well be strangers. It's that family dynamic that usually makes me feel lost at the holidays. Seeing other folks embrace their brothers and sisters can be somewhat painful, but at the same time it also leaves me feeling hopeful in a strange way, because it is good to see that not all families were as fragmented as mine. Who would want a world like that? Ok...my family are circus people...someone has to be...right? LOL.

Actually, there is one member of my family, my last real blood relative, my Aunt Amanda who isn't a circus performer, she is a sweet, loving, kind hearted woman, who is full of energy and who loves me, faults and all. She even shares my wacky sense of humor. With my Aunt Amanda, all she demands of you is that you be yourself...whoever that may be, good or bad. She and I have always been close, and she has been there for me in times when I had lost everyone in my life except for Alan. She has always understood the scars left behind by my mother, because mom was her sister, and she knew all about mom's problems with mental illness. My Aunt has been a neverending source of love and strength for me. She loves me.

Last Wednesday she and I made another memory. Alan decided after my appointment that I would feel better if I went on a drive, as opposed to going right home after my appointment. He grabbed some lunch for us and took me up to Twin Peaks, in San Francisco for a quiet lunch and an afternoon with one of the most stunning views of San Francisco that can be seen. We were up there for about 45 minutes , when Alan decided to go and photograph some beautiful Red Tailed Hawks that were flying on the other side of the vista. I stayed in the car and shut my eyes, trying very hard to not notice how achy I felt and how sad the therapy session had left me. Then...my cell phone rang. It was Amanda.

"Carly...you ok honey? I have been thinking about you for a couple hours." I couldn't help it, I had to cry just a little. She always knows when I need a long distance hug. :) So far this Christmas that is my favorite new memory, the sound of my Aunt Amanda's voice on my cell phone...telling me she loved me...and that I will always have her love and acceptance, then asking me what silly thing I have done lately? We usually get a pretty good laugh sharing our mutual penchant for misadventures. LOL. She is a wonderful lady, and a fun person to make memories with, even across the miles.

Extra Credit: I LOVE Fruitcake. My favorite fruticake was made at a bakery in New Orleans. Sigh. There was nothing like it. They are rebuilding and hope to open up by next Christmas.

-OndineMonet
"The Guardian"
San Mateo, California
November 26th, 2005
Afternoon

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Squirrely At Christmas


"Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles."

-Unknown

Ok, so I am standing in the very narrow aisle of Albertson's grocerie store having the most bizarre conversation with Alan, when all of a sudden it dawned on me...I am a bit squirrelly at times. LOL. Now, I have been noticing for months that I have been losing words and mismatching my verbs and other assorted grammar boo-boos, and frankly it had me somewhat concerned. It all made a lot more sense when my doctor went over the list of symptoms for Fibromyaliga, and sure enough one of the problems one will experience will be difficulty in concentrating. This is also a symptom of Epstein-Barr, the difference is it doesn't take me 20 minutes or more to come up with common words when I am having an Epstein-Barr flare-up, but it does with the Fibromyalgia. Sometimes it can be even more severe, resulting in my not being able to get a whole sentence articulated, that's when I worry. Who wants to seem, "not quite right?" Right? This can be a very judgmental world.

I am taking things slow, following the wonderful advice that I have received from all of you who have either emailed me or left comments with suggestions. Shelly, is right, I have to learn to find my pace, I am new to this and I am in the early stages so I am still educating myself as how to proceed, there is no real reason why I can't lead a somewhat normal life if I want to. So, it's a support group after the first of the year, so I can give as well as get some support and a class in Tai Chi, to keep my muscles in shape. Today was a good day. I was thinking clearly, and I even took a trip to the top of Twin Peaks and got some lovely shots of the city. I am crossing my fingers that I will be able to go next week and do some night shots of San Francisco from Twin Peaks ...the view is stunning.

But sometimes, like at Albertson's the other day I have my moments which remind me of how human I really am. But even I can see the humor in being human, after all if you can't laugh at yourself...others will just do it for you. :) So, here is how the conversation went...

Alan: Carly, do you want to make some cookies or brownies this weekend?

Carly: Well, how about some double chocolate brownies with some chopped Peppermint Patties added on top during the last 5 minutes so they make the brownies taste all minty?

Alan: That sounds good.

Carly: Ok, let me look at the box to get the directions.

Alan: Ok, I will go and get some Peppermint Patties

(During this time in our story our heroine is reading the back of the box of brownies to get the very complicated directions.

Alan: Here are the Peppermint Patties

Carly: I can't believe the directions they have printed on the box! They must be owned by Stouffer's. Look at this...(Carly points to the back of the box) It says use 2 cups unwrapped York Peppermint Patties. What in the world are they thinking? I mean, what kind of recipe would call for leaving the wrappers on. Maybe because the foil would give it a fancy look. Shrug.

Alan:Ummm...Carly...let me see the box please.

Carly: See right there (Carly Pointing to the directions in question).

Alan: Umm...Carly...The directions are right.

Carly: How can THAT be?! Is this like your ridiculous explanation about how you sex a chicken.

(At this time, I hadn't noticed that there was a child of about 7 years of age with his mother standing directly behind me).

Carly: Remember how you tried to tell me that all you had to do was run your fingers between the chickens leg to make he or she flab their wings? Sheesh.

Small child of about 7 years of age: Well, wouldn't it make them flap their wings?

Alan: Laughing his butt off

Mother of the small child: Laughing her butt off.

Child of about 7 years of age: Laughing his butt off.

(Chortles all around).

Carly: Alan, lets get back to the situation with the Peppermint patties...shall weeeeeeeee!!!!!!???? Said Carly, unamused.

Alan: Honey, read the directions slowly.

Carly: Yadda Yadda Yadda...eggs...water...Yadda...OH! UNWRAPPED Peppermint Patties means you take them out of the wrapping. Oh, Never Mind! (Spoken as Emily Latilla).

Now about the squirrel...this past September, Alan and I went on a trip down the 17 Mile drive. The squirrels along the drive are very friendly and will come right up to greet you. They love little offerings of pretzels and cookies, well a lady who was sitting on one of the benches next to me was about to toss the little fella a cheese cracker, but dropped a Starlight Mint by accident. The squirrel LOVED it! It completely rocked his world. That was a fun day...and minty too. Ok, so I am a bit dingy these days...I am never boring. It's all just one more thing. :) I am happy this holiday season, and that is a very nice feeling. :) Thanks everyone. :)

-OndineMonet
"Minty Goodness"
Pacific Grove 17 Mile Drive
September, 2005
Afternoon

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Moon Before Yule

"The night walked down the sky with the moon in her hand."

-Frederic Lawrence

I have had a bit more energy the last couple days, I even went for a short drive by myself last night. The weather has been a bit warmer the last couple days, and so my joints haven't been as swollen, and except for one particularly bizarre conversation I had with Alan at the grocerie store last night, I have been feeling a little more clear headed. So, we decided to take a long drive late this afternoon to Tracy, California, to just get out and about the holiday shoppers. I took the camera with me, I always take my camera along when I leave the house, and as I gazed up into the late afternoon sky I saw the moon, peeking out from a buttermilk sky and I felt warm...inside and out. Even with Alan musing that the closer I get to the Full moon for December, the better I feel. The Full Moon for December with be on the 15th, and is called the "Full Cold Moon" or the "Moon Before Yule." Do you suppose the full Moon is making me feel better? I am wired differently, I tend to feel more depressed in the summer where most folks seem to feel it more in the winter. There I go again...always the nonconformist.

Dawn Came Too Soon
By Tomislav Kendjel

Graceful entwine
Of lovers divine
A shadow over the Moon

Alone in the dark
Light just a spark
Dawn will come soon

Caressing hands
Her eyes like deep wells
In them I will drown

A single tear
Nor sadness, nor fear
But a satisfied frown

Our midnight dance
A lover's glance
A waltz through the flowers in bloom

Music so clear
Quite like your tear
Moon casting an awkward gloom

Aux corps d' athlettes
Our soft silhouettes
Again, shadow over the Moon

I beg you, don't cry
I must say goodbye
For dawn came too soon.

-OndineMonet
"The Moon Before Yule"
Berkeley, California
December 13th, 2005
Late Afternoon

"Lovers In Moonlight" By Marc Chagall

Note: Click on the above image to see it in a larger version.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Art About Town...Sacramento

"The purpose of art is to lay bare the questions which have been hidden."

-James Arthur Baldwin

This past October, I went to Nevada for the first out of state getaway in almost 8 years. On the way we decided to stop in Sacramento to take some photographs of some of the public art displays about town. Sacramento has a lot of open art exhibits. One of the best places to visit is the Capitol Park, which surrounds the Capitol Building. The park is 40 acres filled with trees from around the world, a fantastic rose garden that fills the air with it's spicy, sweet scent, and of course art. Among some of the most poignant of the statues, is the Vietnam memorial which engraved with the names of Californians either killed or missing in action in Vietnam. The California Veteran's Memorial is dedicated to California soldiers who served from the Mexican-American war to the Persian Gulf war. Especially poignant is is the statue of a mother embracing a child with the words printed beneath it on a tiny plaque which reads..."We Honor Those Who Also Sacrificed."Of all the statues that I photographed that day, that is the one I think about the most.

-OndineMonet
"Art In Sacramento"
Late October, 2005
Early Afternoon

Monday, December 12, 2005

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Pictures With A Theme

"Besides the autumn poets sing
A few prosaic days
A little this side of the snow
And that side haze"

-Emily Dickinson

Your Monday Photo Shoot: Show us a series of pictures with a theme.

-John Scalzi

For this week's Monday Photo Shoot, I thought it would be nice to take a multiple look at the last few images of autumn. There is only a little over a week left of my favorite season, and I am afraid I miss it already. Everything seems so much more vibrant to me during this season. The sunsets, the animals, the flowers, the leaves, the harvest, even the cool water moving gently in the brooks, all seem to embrace life as if they know their time is limited. I love my camera. :)

-OndineMonet
"Views Of Autumn"
Autumn 2005

Confused Pasta At Christmas Time

"Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God...I could be eating a slow learner."

-Lyndon B. Johnson

I do a lot of things at my desk. I read, I research interesting things, I edit my photographs, I talk to friends. I drool over David Duchovny, I bake cookies, I fold laundry, I make greeting cards, I draw a devil face on George Bush. I wrap Christmas packages, I clean my oven, I stuff peppers, I play fetch with Elvis. I shop, I contemplate the universe, I sing into my Magic Marker and pretend it's a microphone. I send my friend Danny cryptic emails, and I sometimes eat at my meals at my desk, like tonight. Isn't this strange? I thought Rigatoni was tubular and long, but according to Stouffer's it is kinda shaped like Ravioli. So, I decided to research the mystery before eating my dinner.

I went to the Stouffer's website and looked up the meal in the pasta section, and sure enough they did indeed package the product this way, It wasn't a mistake as far as they were concerned. Ok, but I wasn't satisfied quite yet, so I went to a pasta website that teaches one the proper shapes and sizes of the different pasta varieties, I Love Pasta, and there it was...the Rigatoni I always knew of, but there was no other variety of Rigatoni that looks like what is on the Stouffer's box. The mystery continues! The pasta was delicious by the way...even if it was a bit confused. Maybe it is a slow learner. Jeepers, now I know how LBJ felt. Sigh. LOL. I find the strangest things in my travels, who says you have to leave the house to find adventure? LOL.

-OndineMonet
"Confused Pasta At Christmas"
Berkeley, California
December 12th, 2005
Early Evening

Sunday, December 11, 2005

A Nest In Your Hair

"You cannot prevent the birds of sadness from passing over your head, but you can prevent them from making a nest in your hair."

-Chinese Proverb

As December 10th's go, yesterday wasn't the worst I have seen, in fact it was pretty much uneventful. Well, I mean nothing really unusual happened. Do you suppose that could be the curse in and of itself? Sigh. I am not in the best of moods as I type this entry. No, I am frustrated. Frustrated with myself, frustrated with AOL. Frustrated with learning the newly installed MSN which is now on my computer and will probably be our new ISP after I finish archiving Ellipsis. And oh yeah...I am frustrated with archiving Ellipsis. More then anything else, I am frustrated with the new diagnosis of Fibromyalgia.

I slept 8 full hours last night/morning, and woke up exhausted. I am not reaching that all important 4th stage of sleep. I try so hard to take care of myself, follow the doctor's instructions, but my joints are all swollen, my body aches so bad, my head hurts, I am hungry but don't have enough energy to fix meals for myself at times, so I just lie in bed or sit in a chair and let Elvis cuddle me to keep me warm. I am too young for this, too young to get as tired as I do. I went to Office Depot today, the first time I have driven alone in 3 weeks, and by the time I got home and had a salad, I couldn't take one more step. I was honestly too tired to lift the fork.

I feel bad even complaining, especially in light of the how brave so many in the land have been, while facing truly life threatening illnesses. I don't have a life threatening condition...but it certainly is life altering. I wanted to go and photograph something very special tonight...the Sausalito Lighted Yacht Parade. Tonight was the 17th year that the parade has taken place, and I couldn't go. Alan and I were going to leave when he came home from work, grab a quick bite and then head for Marin County. Nope.

Sigh. It frightens me that I was too tired to have gone. My camera is part of what helped me recover from Anhedonia. My camera is what helped me through the death of both of my parents. My camera is what has seen me through most of the painful moments in my life, and now...it is becoming difficult to plan on the wonderful day trips I pushed myself to take this year. If I had known then what I know now, I wouldn't have taken the first doctor's diagnosis as the absolutely only one available. I wouldn't have pushed myself to keep moving, because I thought it was Epstein-Barr and that is what you do with that condition, as opposed to Fibromyalgia, where that is the very worst thing you could do.

I don't know if I have the energy to learn MSN. I don't know if I have the energy to finish archiving Ellipsis. I know I can't judge everyday of the future as being like the last 24 hours. I refuse to feel sorry for myself, but at the same time...I do feel frustrated. I am going to shake things up a bit for myself today, I am going to sign off and make some Christmas cards to send out. I want to enjoy the holiday this year, it's very special to me this year. As frustrated and sad as I feel tonight, I am very aware of all the blessings I have been given this year. For one thing, I now have the proper diagnosis. :) Right?

-OndineMonet
"Marin County Autumn Sunset"
Marin Headlands
November, 2005
Early Evening

The small light in the center of the photo is the Point Bonita Lighthouse which sits on the cliffs of the Marin Headlands. To see the image larger, click on it and you will be redirected.